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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Philosophic

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Philosophic
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 577
  • Number of comments : 90
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

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Philosophic's favorite FMLs

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. He suddenly pulls away, and goes, 'OMNOMNOMNOM' then continues kissing me. FML

#8938821 (196)

I agree, your life sucks (15363) - you deserved it (14942)

On 03/09/2010 at 1:43am - love - by anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was invited by my boyfriend's parents for dinner at their house. The dinner went well I thought, until I was getting ready to leave. Before I could make it out the front door, I could hear them discussing their disappointment that their son would ever consider someone like me. FML

#8920959 (103)

I agree, your life sucks (20290) - you deserved it (1378)

On 03/08/2010 at 3:27pm - love - by justpeachy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, there was a flood at my friends house. As a result, their cat shelter had to be evacuated, and my mother decided to help. I came home to 23 cats in my bedroom. I'm highly allergic. My face has now swollen up to the size of a football, and I have an important job interview tomorrow. FML

#8847652 (148)

I agree, your life sucks (17327) - you deserved it (1284)

On 03/05/2010 at 5:02pm - animals - by FsuesLife - United Kingdom (Essex)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was quite happily glossing my new bathroom door, when my useless, alcoholic, housemate came rolling in, knocked the paint over, stood in it and without realising, walked it all the way down the stairs. I had just had a brand new carpet fitted. FML

#8819773 (75)

I agree, your life sucks (16019) - you deserved it (2175)

On 03/04/2010 at 7:49am - misc - by Heather (woman) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)

Today, I discovered my employer is advertising for a contractor position within my team performing basically the same role as myself. Except the pay is seven times more. FML

#8815543 (51)

I agree, your life sucks (13903) - you deserved it (1005)

On 03/04/2010 at 12:30am - work - by YankeeDoodle (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I managed to fall face-first into a used condom. FML

#8801488 (249)

I agree, your life sucks (25288) - you deserved it (3672)

On 03/03/2010 at 4:18pm - misc - by uHazFailedTotall - Norway (Rogaland)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boyfriend stole a guy's cookie. As revenge, he stole my iPod. FML

#8800810 (124)

I agree, your life sucks (15490) - you deserved it (2221)

On 03/03/2010 at 3:35pm - misc - by ROLLY - United States (Florida)

Today, my bank card got declined. There should have been $1200 on it, so I went to the bank to check my balance. It was $14. I called the cops, and it turns out my boyfriend has been making $100 withdrawals and purchases everyday for the past three weeks. He wasn't going to tell me. FML

#8800772 (195)

I agree, your life sucks (16415) - you deserved it (3404)

On 03/03/2010 at 3:31pm - money - by mallory - Canada

Today, my throat is really swollen so I can only drink liquid. I noticed home-made ice-lollies in the freezer and had one. It tasted funny. Turns out my little brother had peed in one of those ice-lolly box and put it in the freezer. FML

#8796433 (168)

I agree, your life sucks (22227) - you deserved it (2114)

On 03/03/2010 at 10:09am - health - by icegirl (woman) - Iceland (Gullbringusysla)

Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML

#8751188 (453)

I agree, your life sucks (33671) - you deserved it (6914)

On 03/01/2010 at 5:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had to catch a shuttle bus. I awoke to the sound of a car horn. I ran out in my boxers and saw a bus take off down the road. I chased it, thinking I had missed my bus. I realized I hadn't only when I saw frightened kids in the back of the bus. FML

#8751170 (119)

I agree, your life sucks (4714) - you deserved it (11915)

On 03/01/2010 at 5:04pm - work - by militiousroflcopter (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was asked to take care of my 3 year old little brother. After 15 minutes of him screaming and me trying to keep him entertained, he started throwing his toy cars at me. He hit me in the mouth, and I started to bleed. My parents yelled at me for "not controlling him." FML

#8748145 (132)

I agree, your life sucks (18802) - you deserved it (2397)

On 03/01/2010 at 2:09pm - kids - by moneyman22 - United States (New York)

Today, I was on the city bus, and there was a woman and her child sitting behind me. I began to feel tugging on my jacket so I leaned forward, assuming the child was pulling at my jacket. I sat back and felt the tugging again. After a couple of minutes, I heard the mother say "stop chewing on that!" FML

#8746322 (105)

I agree, your life sucks (16881) - you deserved it (1539)

On 03/01/2010 at 11:59am - kids - by nd.11 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I learnt that if you accidentally sit on a hamster, instead of dying, it bites your testicles. FML

#8742333 (298)

I agree, your life sucks (6543) - you deserved it (25421)

On 03/01/2010 at 4:13am - animals - by ItHurtsLIkeHell (man) - Malaysia (Pulau Pinang)

Today, I was at the gym with my boyfriend. He is a bit feminine, but it has never really bothered me. Until I realised I was lifting heavier weights than he was. FML

#8742158 (243)

I agree, your life sucks (18140) - you deserved it (6204)

On 03/01/2010 at 3:53am - love - by Delilah (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)