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Pham0023

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Pham0023
  • Town/Country : Huntington Beach, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1126
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Pham0023 : Here to have a good laugh :)

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Pham0023's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend called me over to her house. When I knocked, no one responded to the door. I decided to check the back yard and found her sunbathing by the pool. I kneeled by her and placed my hand on her butt, kissing her neck. What I heard next, "So this is what you do with my daughter." FML

#17753266
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29768) - you deserved it (17166)

On 09/15/2011 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I caught my pregnant wife trying to suck milk from her breasts. FML

#17749622
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29832) - you deserved it (5467)

On 09/15/2011 at 3:34am - health - by Scott - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend proposed by painting his chest with "marry me?" and an arrow going down. The ring was attached to his penis with a string. FML

#17743940
292 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35102) - you deserved it (4804)

On 09/14/2011 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by ohmaigawd (woman) - Argentina

Today, I paid a repair man $65 to come to my house and fix my washer. He walked in, looked at the washer, bent over and removed a large steel bolt with a bright red tag sticking out the side saying "Remove before use." He then looked at me and said "all fixed." FML

#17742715
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7553) - you deserved it (36896)

On 09/14/2011 at 5:55am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I tried to scare a new college friend by sneaking up behind her wearing a mask. It worked. And so did her lightning fast reflexes developed from multiple martial arts championships. My 2 cracked ribs, broken nose and bruised ballsack can now be added to her list of achievements. FML

#17649868
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9283) - you deserved it (44240)

On 09/03/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by only1bigdogme - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my grandmother updated her will. Previously, it denied inheritance to family members with non-white spouses, and any mixed-raced children. Now it does the same with politically correct terminology. She then bragged about how accepting she is in front of my Korean husband and our daughter. FML

#17336031
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28659) - you deserved it (3066)

On 08/01/2011 at 8:59pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I have to take medicine that gives me painful, violent farts. Tomorrow, I have to either get fired or go work in an office that's dead silent. How silent? Last week I heard my coworker drop a paperclip, three desks away. FML

#17305922
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34501) - you deserved it (3003)

On 07/30/2011 at 2:58am - work - by Tootie (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, in health class, I raised my hand and asked if you could get an STD from dogs. I have officially now ruined any extremely small chance I had of being popular. FML

#17304355
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8170) - you deserved it (53879)

On 07/30/2011 at 12:38am - animals - by loser4life - United States (Colorado)

Today, while walking home, the gods were kind enough to grace me with the sight of an old man jogging past me in nothing but a pair of short shorts. The image of his balls swinging to and fro underneath like a pendulum has been forever burned into my retinas. FML

#17298408
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26851) - you deserved it (4577)

On 07/29/2011 at 2:26pm - misc - by someone - United States

Today, a bunch of guys at work chased me down a corridor with a Febreze spray for smelling like I'd been "sleeping in a hollowed-out horse's carcass" and having "the personal hygiene of a billy goat." FML

#17283766
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7980) - you deserved it (47451)

On 07/28/2011 at 4:15am - work - by Champion the wonder horse - United States

Today, my 4 year-old daughter's favorite expression became "shit balls." FML

#17283152
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28108) - you deserved it (14936)

On 07/28/2011 at 1:39am - kids - by anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my friends and I went to the strip club for my birthday. I now know how my sister is paying for her new car. FML

#17233282
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50467) - you deserved it (6023)

On 07/23/2011 at 8:09pm - misc - by assante2010 - United States (Maine)

Today, I learned that when you piss on a hornets' nest from a window, the hornets will go after the source of the stream. It can also cause you to fall through your friend's second story window. FML

#17176803
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7493) - you deserved it (50715)

On 07/19/2011 at 12:41pm - misc - by freakfreak12345 - United States (Maine)

Today, I was on a hot date. After we finished supper we went back to his place. My stomach started to feel upset so I politely asked where is bathroom was so I could "powder my nose". After ten minutes of agonizing diarrhea, I looked down and noticed he was out of toilet paper. FML

#17134367
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33685) - you deserved it (4170)

On 07/16/2011 at 9:18am - misc - by anonymous - Canada

Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML

#17109043
424 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29012) - you deserved it (86340)

On 07/14/2011 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by gir - United States (Tennessee)



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