About PeteyPablo12308 : I\\\'m Peter. Im a college student and everything is good except that I live in Idaho... FML :-P I like men.
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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Today, I discovered that I have been falsely accusing my sister of stealing my makeup. How do I know this? Because I found said makeup in the trunk of my boyfriend's car, next to a bag that had fishnet tights and red stilettos in it. Oh, and the stilettos are his size, in case you were wondering. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23621) - you deserved it (1809)
On 08/03/2012 at 2:22am - misc - by SingleAgain (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I was sitting under a rather large house plant in my dining room, minding my own business when a spider lowered itself right in front of my face. It startled me, causing me to gasp, which resulted in me inhaling the spider. I then spent 3 minutes choking on it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20414) - you deserved it (2236)
On 08/02/2012 at 5:08pm - misc - by danonno (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, after spending five years regaining contact with my estranged father, I finally met him. I tearfully dropped my luggage and ran to hug him. He belched and told me to get in the car, because he had diarrhea. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17587) - you deserved it (1707)
On 08/01/2012 at 8:06pm - love - by daddydaughterWTF - United States (Florida)
Today, my 17-year-old daughter's friend told her that superglue works well as lip gloss. She tried it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20313) - you deserved it (3057)
On 07/31/2012 at 1:36am - kids - by mcase - United States (California)
Today, I received my best compliment of the year so far when an ER doctor commented positively on the clarity of my urine sample. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13039) - you deserved it (1304)
On 07/30/2012 at 10:50am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I went to a corner store to re-stock my chocolate stash. A guy from work walked in to see me and the cashier arguing about the amount of candy I was trying to buy with a jar of pennies. He took one look at me and said, "That time of the month, eh?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (7204) - you deserved it (18664)
On 07/30/2012 at 2:59am - misc - by fmlgrl (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I went to the store to buy some new shirts. I tried them on and none of them fit. When I walked out to return the shirts, everybody was staring at me. I looked down to see why. I'd forgotten to put my original shirt back on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6349) - you deserved it (13112)
On 07/30/2012 at 12:40am - misc - by hoaloha - United States (Arizona)
Today, I was taking a walk when I noticed an elderly man on the ground, unmoving. Being a registered nurse, I tried to give him CPR. As my lips touched his, he hacked a loogie and spat it into the back of my throat. I swallowed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27402) - you deserved it (3672)
On 07/29/2012 at 11:24pm - misc - by guy - United States (Ohio)
Today, I went to my favorite burger joint. Upon taking the first bite of my burger, I dislocated my jaw, and the waiters had to call 911. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16761) - you deserved it (1905)
On 07/29/2012 at 1:15am - health - by cherknobil (man) - United States (California)
Today, I began to daydream about going on a diet and losing some weight. As I did so, I unknowingly reached for a giant bag of chips and ate the whole thing. Now, I have stopped daydreaming and am sitting alone and depressed. And I'm all out of chips. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7504) - you deserved it (20302)
On 07/29/2012 at 1:12am - misc - by daydreamer (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, at work in a nursing home, I had to kill imaginary dogs in the lunch room, because they were evil and trying to eat everyone. This started with just one person seeing them, to all 30 of them screaming and freaking out. I spent 45 minutes killing imaginary dogs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20558) - you deserved it (1388)
On 07/25/2012 at 5:05pm - work - by justlittleoldme - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I saw a news story about how wearing flip-flops is dangerous. I scoffed at the ridiculous study and went about my business. Three hours later I accidentally ripped off my toenail. While wearing flip-flops. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8315) - you deserved it (14788)
On 07/23/2012 at 10:08pm - health - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I went to buy some beer using my fake ID, when the cute cashier and I started flirting. When he asked me how old I was, I said without thinking, "Nineteen." FML
I agree, your life sucks (4694) - you deserved it (46099)
On 07/23/2012 at 4:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, while bussing at my restaurant job, I felt a cold, wet animal slither down my leg. I started shrieking loudly and dancing dementedly to get it off, and everyone in the restaurant turned to stare. Then I realized there was a hole in my pocket and some quarters had slid out down my leg. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14247) - you deserved it (5013)
On 07/23/2012 at 11:41am - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)
Today, my neighbor called me on vacation to tell me that she let my mother into my house to feed my fish. I don't have fish, and my mother passed away 3 years ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25893) - you deserved it (1786)
On 07/22/2012 at 11:48pm - misc - by My_Name_Is_Zach -
Monday 17 June 2013
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