About PeteyPablo12308 : I\\\'m Peter. Im a college student and everything is good except that I live in Idaho... FML :-P I like men.
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Today, I helped my friend, who is a slob, move out of my house. I found the source of the funky smell she's been complaining about, under her bed. It was her vibrator. I found it with my bare hands. I had to bleach my hands twice and I still don't feel clean. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24236) - you deserved it (1496)
On 09/20/2012 at 8:05pm - intimacy - by MistressSuzuka (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I helped my friend, who is a slob, move out of my house. I found the source of the funky smell she's been complaining about, under her bed. It was her vibrator. I found it with my bare hands. I had to bleach my hands twice and I still don't feel clean. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24236) - you deserved it (1496)
On 09/20/2012 at 8:05pm - intimacy - by MistressSuzuka (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my 2-year-old told me he found a new finger puppet. It was a used condom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13002) - you deserved it (17593)
On 09/20/2012 at 3:00am - intimacy - by myself - United States (California)
Today, I went to get my nails done for the first time in a while. I don't like to go that much because two of my toes are connected, and I'm very self-conscious about it. The man painting my toes started laughing when he saw them and called all the other employees over to look. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21220) - you deserved it (1465)
On 09/17/2012 at 2:32am - misc - by twinkletoes (woman) - United States
Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his parents. My boyfriend is Japanese, and I wanted to introduce myself in Japanese so I'd asked him. Little did I know he'd taught me how to say, "Hello, I love your son's cock." I almost got kicked out of their house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22542) - you deserved it (3170)
On 09/16/2012 at 8:50pm - love - by painfetish8021 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I was shopping with my boyfriend, when he suggested that I might want to buy a new loofah. When I asked why, he admitted he's been using it to scrub his ass crack for weeks. I use that loofah to wash my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18135) - you deserved it (1605)
On 09/16/2012 at 3:48pm - health - by Derp McShitstain (woman) - United Kingdom (St. Helens)
Today, I got mad at my parents and threatened to run away. Things got so bad that I packed a bag and left, planning to hide in my front yard to teach them a lesson. It's been two hours, and I'm still standing behind a bush in front of my house while they make no effort to look for me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5753) - you deserved it (29971)
On 09/15/2012 at 11:37am - misc - by Rowan Curry - United States (California)
Today, I held hands with a male mannequin in a department store, just to remember what holding hands felt like. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18280) - you deserved it (4144)
On 09/12/2012 at 8:26pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, a creepy girl from my class wouldn't stop texting me and trying to call me. In order to get her to stop, I texted back saying that I was at my mom's house for a family dinner. She replied, "No you're not. I can see you right now." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26643) - you deserved it (3198)
On 09/12/2012 at 5:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my 2-year-old cat finally decided to start catching mice. Like any other cat would, she left it for me to find. I found it in the middle of the night, as my bare foot rolled its guts out of its ass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18284) - you deserved it (1361)
On 09/12/2012 at 2:31pm - animals - by shadokis (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, my cousin suddenly confided in me that he had tried to commit suicide by overdosing when he was 17. Shocked and not knowing how to respond, I blurted out, "Did it work?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (6266) - you deserved it (19536)
On 09/12/2012 at 1:40am - misc - by hahagirl (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, I was sitting in on a boring presentation at work. I yawned and shifted in my chair, accidentally sitting on my testicles. I shrieked in pain and spent the next five minutes choking back tears, while my boss told me to shut my mouth and stop fucking around. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14496) - you deserved it (5243)
On 09/10/2012 at 5:20pm - work - by kevcng (man) - United States
Today, I was out shopping, when I noticed a teenage girl with a double stroller picking up a pack of condoms. I couldn't help but mutter that it was a little late for those. A guy who must have been her boyfriend then stormed over and beat the shit out of me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11334) - you deserved it (47412)
On 09/10/2012 at 1:52pm - intimacy - by killmenow - United States (Washington)
Today, the girl I've secretly loved for years finally noticed me. That is, after I ran over her foot with my truck. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14033) - you deserved it (4359)
On 09/10/2012 at 12:26am - love - by Disappointed (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I snuck out to go see my girlfriend. When I got to her house, I left my bike out front and we went on a nice walk around the block. We passed a homeless-looking woman going the opposite way. About ten minutes later, the same woman passed us, on my bike. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13330) - you deserved it (6774)
On 09/09/2012 at 1:38am - misc - by crabmunch15 - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
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