About OneGirlsLife : College sucks. Work sucks.
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Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
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OneGirlsLife's favorite FMLs
Today, I was exhausted due to staying up all night practicing for the most important performance of my orchestral career. I decided to take a nap to energize myself in preparation of the evening and woke up just in time to realize I'd missed the entire concert. FML
by bruhskoni / 05/30/2015 at 10:25pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, while waxing my bikini line, my husband thought it would be funny to scare me which caused me to close my legs. I am now sitting in the sink with my best friend pouring hot water "down there" trying to remove the wax. FML
by helpme / 07/15/2013 at 1:25pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation
by anonymous / 03/20/2013 at 1:42am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband had a vasectomy this past summer after our son was born and only took one of the two tests. I haven't cheated. He refuses to believe me or get his spunk checked again. FML
by Totallyscrewed / 02/10/2013 at 12:17am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/30/2012 at 7:42pm / United States (Ohio) / Health
Today, my dad was teaching me how to drive. He told me that stop signs with white outlines are "optional." I ran through the next one I saw and got pulled over by a cop. My dad is making me pay the ticket for being "that stupid." Thanks dad. FML
by Dinger1992 / 10/23/2012 at 9:19am / United States / Money
Today, my young son and I were in line at Subway. I guess he got bored and started to insult the teenage girl behind us. I tried to get him to stop, but he wouldn't listen. Eventually the girl punched him in the face and left. As my son cried uncontrollably, everyone else there clapped. FML
by Bratty son / 10/23/2012 at 12:25am / United States (California) / Kids
by monkers / 10/06/2012 at 3:12am / Canada (Alberta) / Health
Today, I was really impressed with the man I've been in a relationship with for over 2 years. He had finally really cleaned his apartment. Everything was washed and fixed, even my stuff was cleared from open surfaces. All so his lover would not find out about me. FML
by Anonymous / 09/30/2012 at 2:29am / Norway (Oslo) / Love
Today, after months of believing my house is haunted, and years of being scared of the dark, I finally had to admit to myself that the only way I can go to the bathroom in the middle of the night is if my cat follows me and sits outside the door. I'm 23. FML
by Anonymous / 09/22/2012 at 8:37pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by sasquatch / 09/08/2012 at 12:03am / United States (New York) / Intimacy
Today, wanting to be romantic, I came home with flowers, and told my girlfriend I love her and that I never want us to fall apart. Before I could finish my second sentence, she farted, said, "Aww, that's so sweet" and quickly excused herself to the bathroom. FML
by Anonymous / 08/14/2012 at 8:12pm / United States / Love
Today, my fiancée showed me her wedding plans. It will be themed on one of her video games, the best man will be dressed as an alien warlord, and the vows talk about how we'll beat the odds and be blessed by the "Goddess Kalahira". Apparently, I have no say in this. FML
by cestquoicebordel?? / 08/14/2012 at 6:50pm / France / Love
Today, it's garbage day. My mom accidentally threw away a receipt she needed to return something and told me to go get it. While I was looking for it, a cop gave me hell for "stealing recyclables on private property." This all happened in my front lawn. FML
by Anonymous / 08/14/2012 at 2:12pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my son displayed an interest in chess, and asked me to teach him to play. Five minutes in, I captured his queen. He screamed "SCREW THIS STUPID GAME", slammed his fist down on his pieces, and started crying because of the pain. He's fourteen years old. FML
by Anonymous / 08/13/2012 at 8:55pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids