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Omit

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  • Number of visits : 806
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Omit's page activity

Visits<b>NickyK</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 12:20am

Omit's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of Omit's badges

Omit's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I were making love for the first time, when out of nowhere my cat meowed from the doorway. My boyfriend sighed, pulled out, and exasperatedly called me a selfish bitch for not having put my cat outside. FML

#19564569
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29187) - you deserved it (4814)

On 05/02/2012 at 6:06pm - intimacy - by S12Sophia (woman) - France

Today, I was looking through my Internet browsing history. Apparently my wife had searched "How to have an affair without getting caught". FML

#19484156
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35564) - you deserved it (2280)

On 04/17/2012 at 2:11pm - love - by Jason199615 - United States (Missouri)

Today, I have been awake so long I hallucinated a llama in my living room. I have a medical condition that keeps me from sleeping properly. I've run out of medication. I still see the llama. FML

#19482788
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31387) - you deserved it (2655)

On 04/17/2012 at 5:38am - health - by SeeingLlamas (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, a guy asked me out and said he was going to take me to a fancy restaurant where they make the food in front of you. I love Japanese food, so I was really excited. We went to Subway. FML

#19449601
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30686) - you deserved it (5099)

On 04/11/2012 at 12:54pm - love - by mista_sandy (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I went to a basketball game. A very pretty woman sat next to him. During the third quarter, the kiss cam came on. But it didn't show him and me, it showed him and the other girl. And they kissed. FML

#19426684
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44473) - you deserved it (3088)

On 04/07/2012 at 11:19pm - love - by jordyn173 - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was escorted out of the building for getting in a scuffle at my anger management class. FML

#19424276
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6673) - you deserved it (23781)

On 04/07/2012 at 3:30pm - misc - by breakfast tea (man) - Hong Kong

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through a text message. In retaliation, I started typing a long list of everything I hate about her. Just as I pressed the send button, she text me again saying "Just joking. You know I'd never leave you. Love you babe :)" FML

#19211804
320 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39702) - you deserved it (27447)

On 03/04/2012 at 12:02am - love - by Autocorrected (man) - Philippines (Bulacan)

Today, someone actually thought it was appropriate to compare my mother's death to the death of their cat. FML

#19125744
203 comments

Today, I went to the gas station, paid the clerk, and drove off without pumping any gas. FML

#18921610
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12673) - you deserved it (34187)

On 01/26/2012 at 11:46pm - money - by ChevRooon - United States

Today, I accidentally slammed a door on my own arm flab. FML

#18915455
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13149) - you deserved it (28303)

On 01/26/2012 at 11:45am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, a kid came trick or treating to my house. When I told him Halloween was nearly two weeks ago, his reaction was to savagely kick me in the shin and run off screaming obscenities. This is the same kid who broke down in tears when I gave him candy on the real Halloween. FML

#18222610
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27530) - you deserved it (2472)

On 11/11/2011 at 9:04pm - kids - by Username - United States (Maryland)

Today, I cut my penis on a desk fan. FML

#18217902
379 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18387) - you deserved it (77397)

On 11/11/2011 at 10:53am - intimacy - by dumbassbuffet (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I went to a dinner party. I had a bad stomach, so I made a dash to the bathroom and forgot to lock the door. While I was in, I heard some voices outside. In a panic, my reflex was to get up and lock the door. I did so, while simultaneously shitting all over myself. FML

#18205995
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25879) - you deserved it (10157)

On 11/09/2011 at 10:15pm - health - by stinkypants - India

Today, I found out that my 20-year-old boyfriend won't touch my boobs because he is afraid his parents will find out. FML

#18203488
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42366) - you deserved it (5068)

On 11/09/2011 at 5:48pm - intimacy - by Great... (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I went over to my friend's house. We were teasing each other, when she stood up and began to jokingly walk away. Trying to be cute, I tried to pull her onto my knee. I miscalculated and she ended up sitting right on my boner. FML

#18098530
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29950) - you deserved it (17615)

On 10/28/2011 at 7:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oklahoma)



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