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Omit

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  • Number of visits : 843
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Omit's page activity

Visits<b>NickyK</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 12:20am

Omit's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of Omit's badges

Omit's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked into my upstairs bathroom to find my mom's new boyfriend eating soup, naked on the toilet. In shock, I stepped back and fell down a flight of stairs, backwards, and hit my head on wall, leaving a dent in it. FML

#19984594
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25636) - you deserved it (1983)

On 07/26/2012 at 1:14am - misc - by Lilragu97 - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, everyone found out about the strange but intense fetish I have for women physically lifting me. It all came out when my friend, a female bodybuilder, decided to grab and pick me up for a laugh. I came in my pants, in front of about twenty people. FML

#19983416
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38333) - you deserved it (8189)

On 07/25/2012 at 12:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, everyone found out about the strange but intense fetish I have for women physically lifting me. It all came out when my friend, a female bodybuilder, decided to grab and pick me up for a laugh. I came in my pants, in front of about twenty people. FML

#19983416
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38333) - you deserved it (8189)

On 07/25/2012 at 12:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I went on a fifth date with a guy, and he asked me if we could be boyfriend and girlfriend. Just after I said yes, he pulled out a contract and asked me to sign on the dotted line. FML

#19983177
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27348) - you deserved it (3054)

On 07/25/2012 at 9:03am - love - by Unlucky (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I told my son to go clean his mess of a room. He yelled, "Dobby has no master! Dobby is a free elf!" and walked off. He turned 18 a week ago. FML

#19983117
321 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26133) - you deserved it (12395)

On 07/25/2012 at 6:54am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my dad sat me down for a talk. After the talk, he wasn't my dad anymore. FML

#19942597
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39764) - you deserved it (1845)

On 07/15/2012 at 8:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was having a funny conversation with a guy I had met on Xbox. I told him the state I lived in, and he said, "Don't tell me that, I might stalk you." He wasn't kidding. He has somehow found out my phone number, and my address. He says he's going to send me flowers. FML

#19828397
273 comments

Today, I decided to motivate myself to workout by looking at a picture of a guy with a six-pack on my computer screen while doing abs. My dad walked in after I finished and was still breathing heavily from working out. FML

#19795313
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24071) - you deserved it (6646)

On 06/16/2012 at 1:45am - misc - by NotGay (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, it was my birthday. When my crush spotted me in the hallway and wished me a Happy Birthday, my nerves got the best of me and I blurted, "You too". FML

#19795247
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25961) - you deserved it (4658)

On 06/16/2012 at 12:58am - love - by thefailwhale (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I tried to go to the gym, but I ended up watching cat videos on YouTube for three hours. FML

#19791305
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9764) - you deserved it (34446)

On 06/15/2012 at 7:27am - health - by latino14 - United States (Maryland)

Today, Child Protective Services came to my house, because my 7-year-old son told people at school that he was uncomfortable sleeping in his uncle's bed. I had to explain to them that the uncle in question died 2 years ago, and that's why it felt weird. FML

#19713901
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31150) - you deserved it (2354)

On 06/01/2012 at 3:02am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while in the bathroom, I started absent-mindedly drumming on my thighs. I didn't stop to think that people outside would think I was masturbating. FML

#19655658
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21378) - you deserved it (6874)

On 05/21/2012 at 1:56am - intimacy - by morethanredhands -

Today, I was at the laundromat when a huge, tattoo-covered man wearing nothing but denim booty shorts and a wife-beater sat down beside me. He stared at me for a while, before telling me all about how I reminded him of his "first prison bitch." FML

#19644212
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25217) - you deserved it (1935)

On 05/18/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, while sitting at a red light, I guiltily nibbled on a chocolate bar and looked around to make sure no one saw me cheating on my diet.  A police car pulled up, I panicked, stepped on the gas, and ran the light. FML

#19609899
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8642) - you deserved it (47890)

On 05/12/2012 at 12:27am - misc - by Snickers (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl, so I put an extra 30 pounds on the bar, I lowered, pushed... and pooped. FML

#19572377
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13171) - you deserved it (41407)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:49am - health - by authorsubmit - United States



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