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Olivxr

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Olivxr

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1261
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Olivxr : I'm lazy.

Olivxr's page activity

Visits<b>Owlnight321</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 11:32pm<b>britneycheyene</b> - the 12/01/2013 at 8:47pm<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 11/27/2013 at 4:40pm<b>Fiestasaur</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 12:41pm<b>24jfred</b> - the 10/05/2013 at 2:57pm<b>vampirefairy_07</b> - the 09/28/2013 at 10:57pm<b>rawr_ily96</b> - the 07/21/2013 at 10:49pm<b>bvbarmy4ever</b> - the 06/30/2013 at 1:11am<b>darthgab</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 5:39pm<b>Firefighter319</b> - the 01/07/2013 at 10:27am<b>lovelybetty</b> - the 01/07/2013 at 4:34am<b>meeju</b> - the 01/07/2013 at 1:19am<b>devildog562</b> - the 01/06/2013 at 10:26pm<b>justernie22</b> - the 01/06/2013 at 9:50am<b>chuckpanda</b> - the 01/06/2013 at 9:05am<b>ydi_4_suking</b> - the 01/05/2013 at 11:10pm<b>hutch66</b> - the 01/05/2013 at 7:55pm<b>Wiringify</b> - the 01/05/2013 at 7:39pm

Olivxr's FML badges

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Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

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Olivxr's favorite FMLs

Today, I accidentally decoded the system my parents use for talking about sex while I'm around. It's a substituion cipher, using literary references. As they're both lit. professors, this has me perpetually grossed-out and wondering, "Are they really talking about Anne Frank, or anal fisting?" FML

#20042325
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23919) - you deserved it (2078)

On 08/26/2012 at 5:21am - misc - by ewww (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, at the water park, my grandmother's boob slipped out. Every time I close my eyes, I see her dangling breast in my mind. FML

#20029280
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28770) - you deserved it (2489)

On 08/19/2012 at 1:25am - misc - by JMG - United States

Today, while life-guarding, I had to explain to teenage boys that shoving objects up each others' butts and complaining that someone was giving them anal was inappropriate at a family facility in front of kids under the age of 10. FML

#19995362
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22380) - you deserved it (1391)

On 07/31/2012 at 9:54pm - work - by kaitlyna15 - United States (Washington)

Today, I decided I need to get a life. I reached this epiphany when I failed to take notice of my friend calling me, until he started calling out my Xbox gamertag. FML

#19991008
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6535) - you deserved it (21062)

On 07/29/2012 at 4:20pm - misc - by kumbuck3t15 (man) - Mexico (Baja California)

Today, my bra burst apart in the middle of class. I then had the privilege of asking my male teacher if I could borrow his stapler to put it back together. FML

#19067640
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27221) - you deserved it (3957)

On 02/13/2012 at 7:28pm - misc - by chlolivia (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got circumcised by my girlfriend's braces. FML

#18661455
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52391) - you deserved it (10714)

On 12/31/2011 at 4:21am - intimacy - by nickthetank (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I spent the day crying, and ate McDonald's for my Christmas dinner. FML

#18613200
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40702) - you deserved it (5075)

On 12/26/2011 at 1:33am - misc - by Holly Jolly (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I stayed up until 4 am. I was waiting for both my cats to fall asleep, so I could play Santa and stuff their stockings in secret. FML

#18605439
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17112) - you deserved it (50326)

On 12/25/2011 at 6:39am - animals - by Anonymoose (woman) - Switzerland (Zurich)

Today, I was out clubbing, when some bloke at the bar started trying to pick fights with everyone. Trying to defuse the situation with humour, I said, "I used to be a tough guy like you. Then I took an arrow in the knee." The next thing I know, I have a broken nose. FML

#18593025
325 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14823) - you deserved it (37309)

On 12/23/2011 at 9:49pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, I found out that, when mad at us, my son picks the tops off his shoulder-pimples and sprinkles them in our food. FML

#18559363
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42694) - you deserved it (5103)

On 12/20/2011 at 2:45am - kids - by Pimpleeater (woman) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I caught my mother attempting to write a $1400 cheque. To whom? The proprietor of a "Christian charity fund" with whom she had been having Internet conversations. The proprietor's name, and that on the cheque, was "Herp McDerpington". FML

#18540980
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31024) - you deserved it (2408)

On 12/18/2011 at 12:18am - misc - by scammed - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I found out that if a cop asks you if you have any weapons, and you reply by saying "only these guns" while flexing your biceps, they won't take it very well. And neither will the cops down at the station. FML

#18444451
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11683) - you deserved it (44327)

On 12/06/2011 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I got trapped in an elevator with a chicken. FML

#18334722
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28368) - you deserved it (3704)

On 11/24/2011 at 5:35am - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I popped a boner while my braces were being tightened. FML

#18309491
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33838) - you deserved it (6899)

On 11/21/2011 at 5:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I was involved in a car accident and hit my head on the dash. I now have huge, very sore knot on my head. My boyfriend now takes every opportunity to poke it and scream "Look! A baby unicorn!" FML

#18280377
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29126) - you deserved it (3749)

On 11/18/2011 at 10:26am - misc - by southernpride93 - United States (Florida)



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