Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Okamigurl

Offline (yesterday at 8:29pm) | Search for a member

Okamigurl

5Fucked!

OkamigurlOkamigurl
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 2 April 1990 (25 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4344
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Okamigurl : I'm the kind of girl everyone gets along with. I am happy and perky most of the time, I do like proper grammar but most of the time I won't correct you on it. Don't be a douche bag and I won't have to be a witch with a"B"and tell you to, "shut the front door!" Toodles! ;^)

Okamigurl's page activity

Visits<b>bmba94</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 8:15pm<b>paravoz</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 2:19am<b>pudding4me</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 11:59pm<b>evans3232</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 11:49pm<b>Scryll</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 10:19pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 4:32pm<b>Matheo</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 3:55pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 3:37pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 10:09am<b>Gillett</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 9:10am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 7:22am<b>Mc_Knapkins</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 7:05am<b>sarah5745</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 5:40am<b>_Marco_Polo_</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 5:34am<b>the_rad_brad47</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 4:16am<b>Raxy</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 4:08am<b>abattior</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 5:47am<b>ligerzero459</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 10:02am

Fucked!<b>martin8337</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 10:32pm<b>Matheo</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 9:55pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 4:09pm<b>Gillett</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 3:13pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 1:23pm

Okamigurl's FML badges

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of Okamigurl's badges

Okamigurl's favorite FMLs

Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML

#18733573
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21621) - you deserved it (41489)

On 01/07/2012 at 5:27am - intimacy - by Danny - Australia

Today, I told my parents that I wanted to donate blood. My dad helpfully interjected, "Sorry, they don't accept blood from gingers." FML

#18678605
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32234) - you deserved it (8034)

On 01/01/2012 at 8:22pm - health - by GingerJ (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my 9 month old son realized he is just as tired as I am. His solution is to cry loudly. My solution was to cry along with him. FML

#18631898
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31509) - you deserved it (4752)

On 12/28/2011 at 3:14am - kids - by anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had to share a car with my dad and stepmother. My stepmother managed to get hammered at lunch and spent the hour-long car trip drunkenly mistaking the heating controls for the radio. FML

#18599124
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21220) - you deserved it (2135)

On 12/24/2011 at 3:04pm - misc - by ambled - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I learned if you've slept with your soon to be step-brother you should tell your family. If you don't, he may blurt it out while drunk at a family barbecue. FML

#18594969
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15717) - you deserved it (38959)

On 12/24/2011 at 1:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my mother was watching me play Pokémon. She walked over to the TV and pulled the plug before ranting about how shameful it is that her 17 year old daughter plays Pokémon. She then sat down at the computer and started playing Farmville. FML

#18594471
279 comments

Today, I invited a few of my co-workers over to play video games. Within an hour, my wife had gotten drunk, grabbed my controller, told me to "get back in the kitchen", and described to everyone in blood-chilling detail how she took her first boyfriend's virginity. FML

#18591891
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30668) - you deserved it (3608)

On 12/23/2011 at 7:26pm - misc - by ThinZ (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I saw my dad sitting in the car alone, blaring classical music, blowing up beach balls. FML

#18583551
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23370) - you deserved it (3883)

On 12/22/2011 at 9:58pm - misc - by bellerz14 - United States

Today, I was wanking and starting thinking about why the Simpsons are yellow, and how that came to be. I haven't been laid in 4 years and my ADD is so crippling that I can't jack off. FML

#18567252
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32438) - you deserved it (5961)

On 12/21/2011 at 1:18am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my boyfriend started freaking out about how his penis floats in water. Baths with him will never be the same again. FML

#18566485
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26675) - you deserved it (3746)

On 12/20/2011 at 11:32pm - intimacy - by bathtime (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my boyfriend started freaking out about how his penis floats in water. Baths with him will never be the same again. FML

#18566485
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26675) - you deserved it (3746)

On 12/20/2011 at 11:32pm - intimacy - by bathtime (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, someone put dog turds underneath all the decorative reindeers' butts in my front yard. The chief suspect is my curmudgeonly, holidays-hating fuckball of a neighbor. Last week he repositioned them in very suggestive poses. FML

#18565100
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22845) - you deserved it (5483)

On 12/20/2011 at 9:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot and heavy. She had her shirt off, and commented on the small size of her breasts. Trying to make her feel better, I said I dated smaller breasts. She replied by saying she'd dated bigger penises. FML

#18561391
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16643) - you deserved it (52939)

On 12/20/2011 at 12:57pm - intimacy - by Ryan - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was working on the computer when my dad walks in, pointing his finger at me like a gun. Before I could even ask, it turns out he was aiming a rubber band at me. The doctor says I'll be able to take off my eye patch in a couple of days. FML

#18549843
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31552) - you deserved it (2397)

On 12/19/2011 at 12:03am - health - by suhleedah18 - United States

Today, my five-year-old daughter told me she was going to throw up. I told her to rush to the bathroom. I followed her a few seconds later, only to find her sitting on the toilet and vomiting onto the floor. FML

#18534964
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34418) - you deserved it (6200) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/17/2011 at 10:42am - kids - by espylone - France



FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #17
  • It's here! Yep, time once more to delve into the darkest corners of the FML postbag and check out the stuff that never would've seen the light of day, had we not had a vicious streak in our brains. It's…

Tuesday 25 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: