Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Okamigurl

Offline (yesterday at 8:28pm) | Search for a member

Okamigurl

5Fucked!

OkamigurlOkamigurl
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 2 April 1990 (25 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4352
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Okamigurl : I'm the kind of girl everyone gets along with. I am happy and perky most of the time, I do like proper grammar but most of the time I won't correct you on it. Don't be a douche bag and I won't have to be a witch with a"B"and tell you to, "shut the front door!" Toodles! ;^)

Okamigurl's page activity

Visits<b>bmba94</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 8:15pm<b>paravoz</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 2:19am<b>pudding4me</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 11:59pm<b>evans3232</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 11:49pm<b>Scryll</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 10:19pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 4:32pm<b>Matheo</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 3:55pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 3:37pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 10:09am<b>Gillett</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 9:10am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 7:22am<b>Mc_Knapkins</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 7:05am<b>sarah5745</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 5:40am<b>_Marco_Polo_</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 5:34am<b>the_rad_brad47</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 4:16am<b>Raxy</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 4:08am<b>abattior</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 5:47am<b>ligerzero459</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 10:02am

Fucked!<b>martin8337</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 10:32pm<b>Matheo</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 9:55pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 4:09pm<b>Gillett</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 3:13pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 1:23pm

Okamigurl's FML badges

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of Okamigurl's badges

Okamigurl's favorite FMLs

Today, while putting on a load of laundry, I squeezed the detergent bottle and it made a noise like a woman's orgasm. After laughing, I realised that I'm probably too immature to be washing my own clothes. FML

#19521311
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10978) - you deserved it (26447)

On 04/24/2012 at 10:03am - intimacy - by mmmtortilla (woman) - Spain (Pais Vasco)

Today, I woke up to a really cold feeling down below. I opened my eyes and saw my girlfriend grinning like a maniac and holding my crotch-sausage between two scissor blades. I screamed in terror like a little bitch, and she says I'm never gonna live this down. FML

#19506149
430 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45566) - you deserved it (4171)

On 04/21/2012 at 1:38pm - intimacy - by Hakimstah (man) - Lebanon

Today, I tried to put together some flat-pack furniture. I wound up in my underpants, screaming stuff like, "Fuck you, fucking Ikea bastard" at pieces of confusing plywood. FML

#19488517
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10488) - you deserved it (19810)

On 04/18/2012 at 3:18am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had to put one of my preschool students in timeout for masturbating during nap time. FML

#19486028
327 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39405) - you deserved it (3742)

On 04/17/2012 at 8:07pm - intimacy - by lindsaykay - United States

Today, my wife sent me to the store to pick stuff up so we could make BLTs. I got the bacon, but couldn't remember what else went into them, so I bought an avocado and napkins. When I got back home, my wife very slowly and sarcastically explained what BLT stands for. FML

#19424336
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7895) - you deserved it (50347)

On 04/07/2012 at 3:40pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I cleaned my computer screen for the first time in ages. When I turned it on a few hours later, I spent an embarrassing amount of time trying to figure out why the brightness was suddenly so painfully high. FML

#19424189
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6704) - you deserved it (25359)

On 04/07/2012 at 3:12pm - misc - by strokingitasitype (man) - Canada (Newfoundland)

Today, my ex-husband officially became my step dad. FML

#19421919
387 comments

I agree, your life sucks (91663) - you deserved it (4607)

On 04/07/2012 at 4:20am - love - by ladylarni - Australia

Today, during sex, my boyfriend stops and asks if he can eat a sandwich while we do it. FML

#19414574
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29563) - you deserved it (4598)

On 04/05/2012 at 10:11pm - intimacy - by Krissy (woman) - United States

Today, since I'm too broke to get a new one, I had to duct tape my bra. FML

#19303310
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26681) - you deserved it (3059)

On 03/18/2012 at 8:51pm - money - by liver (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a little girl looked at me and yelled "Mommy look, there's a real leprechaun!" FML

#19296318
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23998) - you deserved it (2425)

On 03/17/2012 at 8:48pm - kids - by Redhead4life (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I washed my sheets. They wouldn't dry quick enough, so I had to use my old Buzz Lightyear sheets. My new girlfriend took it upon herself to become a damn psychic and pay me a surprise visit right there and then. FML

#19293658
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20493) - you deserved it (3784)

On 03/17/2012 at 12:22pm - love - by babysheets (man) - Uruguay (Montevideo)

Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML

#19276120
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31994) - you deserved it (19454)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:51am - misc - by daddy-o - United States (Utah)

Today, I was sitting on the couch with my fiancé, when he jumped up and viciously sat on my face. I then heard, smelled, and tasted the most violent, horrific fart known to man. I still can't get the taste out of my mouth, and he can't stop laughing. I'm getting married to this guy. FML

#19275580
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28436) - you deserved it (13365)

On 03/14/2012 at 1:18am - love - by anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was shaving naked in my cold bathroom before showering. My wife walked up behind me, yelled "Shrinkage!" and flicked the head of my penis as hard as she could. FML

#19261628
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34145) - you deserved it (4419)

On 03/12/2012 at 12:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I asked my boss for a raise. He gave me a cupcake. FML

#19235270
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23814) - you deserved it (3626)

On 03/07/2012 at 8:08pm - work - by Janitor (woman) - United States (Utah)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: