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Okamigurl

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Okamigurl
  • Town/Country : My Mind, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 2 April 1990 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 2186
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Okamigurl : I'm the kind of girl everyone gets along with. I am happy and perky most of the time, I do like proper grammar but most of the time I won't correct you on it. Don't be a douche bag and I won't have to be a witch with a"B"and tell you to, "shut the front door!" Toodles! ;^)

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Okamigurl's favorite FMLs

Today, I gave birth to my daughter in a hospital corridor. The nurse who took me to my room afterward tried to comfort me by saying there've been worse incidents; she said that two years ago, a lady gave birth in the parking lot. That was me too. FML

#20521872
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47775) - you deserved it (3180) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/25/2013 at 2:47pm - health - by laprochainefoisjerestealamaison (woman) - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)

Today, I was holding the door open for a friend. She told me to wait a second because she had to finish a text. Nearly a minute passed before I asked why she wouldn't come inside to finish typing. We were at a Chinese restaurant. She thought the "No MSG" sign meant you couldn't text inside. FML

#20519764
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28520) - you deserved it (3189)

On 02/24/2013 at 2:53am - misc - by cls_x (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I met my new class. There are two Kevin Smiths. Neither will agree to a nickname, they have the same hair color, and their middle names both start with J. They have told me to call them Kevin 1 and Kevin 2. They both want to be Kevin 1. FML

#20512577
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35103) - you deserved it (2803)

On 02/18/2013 at 7:26pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I took an afternoon nap, and when I woke up, it was pitch black outside. Still groggy, I went downstairs, only to see my dad sporting a shocked expression and a suspiciously powder-white beard. He actually almost convinced me that I'd just woken up from a five year coma. FML

#20510255
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26379) - you deserved it (5708)

On 02/17/2013 at 12:56am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was visiting my 8-year-old nephew. He told me he learned about fire safety, so I asked him what he'd do if there were a fire right now. He pushed me out of the way and I fell, then he ran over me and out the front door, leaving me on the floor in pain. FML

#19555079
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14191) - you deserved it (2680)

On 04/30/2012 at 8:22pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while putting on a load of laundry, I squeezed the detergent bottle and it made a noise like a woman's orgasm. After laughing, I realised that I'm probably too immature to be washing my own clothes. FML

#19521311
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8179) - you deserved it (21090)

On 04/24/2012 at 10:03am - intimacy - by mmmtortilla (woman) - Spain (Pais Vasco)

Today, I woke up to a really cold feeling down below. I opened my eyes and saw my girlfriend grinning like a maniac and holding my crotch-sausage between two scissor blades. I screamed in terror like a little bitch, and she says I'm never gonna live this down. FML

#19506149
426 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38693) - you deserved it (3514)

On 04/21/2012 at 1:38pm - intimacy - by Hakimstah (man) - Lebanon

Today, I tried to put together some flat-pack furniture. I wound up in my underpants, screaming stuff like, "Fuck you, fucking Ikea bastard" at pieces of confusing plywood. FML

#19488517
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8622) - you deserved it (16755)

On 04/18/2012 at 3:18am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had to put one of my preschool students in timeout for masturbating during nap time. FML

#19486028
323 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35856) - you deserved it (3390)

On 04/17/2012 at 8:07pm - intimacy - by lindsaykay - United States

Today, my wife sent me to the store to pick stuff up so we could make BLTs. I got the bacon, but couldn't remember what else went into them, so I bought an avocado and napkins. When I got back home, my wife very slowly and sarcastically explained what BLT stands for. FML

#19424336
280 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6267) - you deserved it (44659)

On 04/07/2012 at 3:40pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I cleaned my computer screen for the first time in ages. When I turned it on a few hours later, I spent an embarrassing amount of time trying to figure out why the brightness was suddenly so painfully high. FML

#19424189
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5329) - you deserved it (21908)

On 04/07/2012 at 3:12pm - misc - by strokingitasitype (man) - Canada (Newfoundland)

Today, my ex-husband officially became my step dad. FML

#19421919
386 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82650) - you deserved it (4000)

On 04/07/2012 at 4:20am - love - by ladylarni - Australia

Today, during sex, my boyfriend stops and asks if he can eat a sandwich while we do it. FML

#19414574
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20882) - you deserved it (3078)

On 04/05/2012 at 10:11pm - intimacy - by Krissy (woman) - United States

Today, since I'm too broke to get a new one, I had to duct tape my bra. FML

#19303310
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24893) - you deserved it (2887)

On 03/18/2012 at 8:51pm - money - by liver (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a little girl looked at me and yelled "Mommy look, there's a real leprechaun!" FML

#19296318
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18850) - you deserved it (1691)

On 03/17/2012 at 8:48pm - kids - by Redhead4life (man) - United States (Florida)



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