Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ObsessedWithMe

Offline (the 10/14/2014 at 4:28am) | Search for a member

ObsessedWithMe

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 703
  • Number of comments : 71
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About ObsessedWithMe : I'm actually really lame.

ObsessedWithMe's page activity

Visits<b>annonomys4582</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 2:38pm<b>suckstosuckgirl</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 9:50pm<b>waterski123</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 5:58pm<b>DOMEinic</b> - the 01/05/2014 at 8:18pm<b>Dipmunch</b> - the 12/17/2013 at 4:06am<b>last_kings84</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 11:37pm<b>i_lol_at_life</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 3:40pm<b>mazdatuner09</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 9:35am<b>mercrover</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 4:00am<b>zaag</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 2:03am<b>matt300</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 11:39pm<b>apollo436</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 11:17pm<b>TechFire</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 10:20pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 9:37pm<b>papayeya</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 8:14pm<b>Thursdayxo</b> - the 10/19/2013 at 3:08pm<b>DLS930</b> - the 10/07/2013 at 6:25pm<b>kievking</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 1:49pm

ObsessedWithMe's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of ObsessedWithMe's badges

ObsessedWithMe's favorite FMLs

Today, I was watching some pretty intense porn on my Macbook. I unplugged the second monitor so I could lie on my bed. Instead of defaulting to the screen, Airplay somehow synced it to the living room TV, where the rest of my family was watching a movie. FML

#20052962
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19332) - you deserved it (46998)

On 09/01/2012 at 7:14pm - intimacy - by WhyAppleWhy (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my dog, who has been specially trained to go for help when I'm having a seizure, went to alert my parents downstairs that I was having an emergency. The "emergency" was me masturbating. FML

#20052579
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33014) - you deserved it (10268)

On 09/01/2012 at 1:56pm - intimacy - by thewhompingwillow (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had to finally accept that my husband is too large for me. Normally, it'd be a bragging point, except my private parts can't handle it. After several infections brought on after vaginal tearing, I'm having to choose between being in perpetual pain, or giving up my sex life. FML

#20028986
325 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48091) - you deserved it (3420)

On 08/18/2012 at 10:48pm - intimacy - by sal (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I slammed the car door on my head while I was getting in the car. If that wasn't bad enough, my boyfriend is convinced I now have a concussion and insists on waking me up every hour to make sure I'm still alive. FML

#20001841
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18656) - you deserved it (5236)

On 08/04/2012 at 5:33am - health - by MAC. - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went on a fifth date with a guy, and he asked me if we could be boyfriend and girlfriend. Just after I said yes, he pulled out a contract and asked me to sign on the dotted line. FML

#19983177
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27286) - you deserved it (3052)

On 07/25/2012 at 9:03am - love - by Unlucky (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I had a few friends over. Wanting to seem cool, I yelled at my girlfriend to get me a beer. She chucked four bottles at my head. All my friends cheered her on. FML

#19957248
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6136) - you deserved it (70643)

On 07/19/2012 at 12:55am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the first time. About 2 hours later, he got to hold my hair while I puked, also for the first time. FML

#19312067
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20006) - you deserved it (6177)

On 03/20/2012 at 1:49am - love - by notsober - United States

Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML

#19276120
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28924) - you deserved it (18099)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:51am - misc - by daddy-o - United States (Utah)

Today, I caught my mother attempting to write a $1400 cheque. To whom? The proprietor of a "Christian charity fund" with whom she had been having Internet conversations. The proprietor's name, and that on the cheque, was "Herp McDerpington". FML

#18540980
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30965) - you deserved it (2403)

On 12/18/2011 at 12:18am - misc - by scammed - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my mom took a bright red sharpie and drew a red circle just above my breasts. She said, "If I can see this, ever, your shirt is either too low cut or too see through and it will be thrown away." FML

#17977433
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27477) - you deserved it (10719)

On 10/13/2011 at 8:10pm - misc - by Cassandra (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my brother in law got into a fight with my husband. My pregnant sister was yelling at her husband to stop beating my husband up. When I came into the room, I asked why they were fighting. You'll never guess who the real father of my sister's baby is. FML

#17977094
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64094) - you deserved it (3201)

On 10/13/2011 at 7:20pm - love - by Good sister (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, in the middle of explaining over the phone to my crush how I felt about him, I got a text from his best friend, who was apparently with him at the time. It said, "He doesn't like you, get over it. Stop rambling." FML

#17958014
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31032) - you deserved it (5331)

On 10/11/2011 at 3:32am - love - by poopooppachuu - United States (California)

Today, my six-year-old got in an argument with my four-year-old. I told them to go outside. The next thing I know, my son was standing in front of his sister's burning Barbie's Malibu Dream House, singing "Burn Baby Burn" and cackling madly. FML

#17884513
422 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32818) - you deserved it (9217)

On 10/02/2011 at 3:27am - kids - by TraumatizedMother (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was at my job in the Halloween store. I had to tell someone, "Please stop hitting the Bieber wig with that pimp cane." FML

Today, I went on a date with a guy who seemed to be quite the gentleman. I was proven wrong when he told me to "shut it" during dinner, stiffed me on the bill, and then left me at the restaurant so he could get his own taxi home. FML

#15102799
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28342) - you deserved it (4615)

On 02/24/2011 at 3:03pm - misc - by OhDear (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: