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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 710
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Obamas_daughter's page activity

Visits<b>NoNotTheFace</b> - the 10/04/2011 at 1:35pm

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Obamas_daughter's favorite FMLs

Today, my engagement ring was seized by the police, and my fiancé was arrested on larceny charges. Both in the same visit. FML

by madison77 / 11/21/2011 at 6:26pm / United States / Love

Today, I carpooled with my co-worker whose girlfriend has left him. The radio was playing the song "Jar of Hearts." He then began to sing intensely, and broke down crying. FML

by Anon / 11/14/2011 at 3:45am / United States (Nevada) / Work

Today, I bought weed for the first time. The dealer was an undercover cop. FML

by honeybadger123 / 11/13/2011 at 8:11pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I realized I have to choose between being unemployed or putting up with my perverted boss who desperately wants me. I'm a guy and so is he. FML

by Anonymous / 11/09/2011 at 12:20pm / Romania (Mures) / Work

Today, I discovered my sister has a crystal meth problem when she set fire to our house. FML

by Anonymous / 11/08/2011 at 11:11pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend sent me a sexy picture of herself in my boxers. I thought it would be funny to take a picture of myself in the thong she left in my room and send it to her. She thought it would be funnier on Facebook. FML

by kdeeeceee / 11/05/2011 at 3:25am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, for the first time in years, I broke down in tears, over a Hallmark commercial. FML

by Anonymous / 11/04/2011 at 3:38pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, it was my first time taking blood on the ward. The doctor saw that I was nervous and gave me a violent old man with schizophrenia who thought I was there to kill him. FML

by sakura_girl / 11/04/2011 at 7:59am / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boyfriend admitted that the only reason he remembers my eye color is because it's the same shade of his shit after he's had a salad. FML

by poopcoloredeyes / 10/31/2011 at 4:06pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, while standing in line at the supermarket, I reached past my wife to get a pack of gum. She jokingly did the "battered wife flinch" to get a laugh, and smiled at me from behind her hand. The cop staring at us obviously didn't notice the smile and definitely didn't think it was funny. FML

by spacemanspiff78 / 10/31/2011 at 11:07am / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned that all of the anonymous Valentine's gifts I received throughout high school were sent out of pity by my sister. FML

Today, while in the car with my mom, she gave me a lecture about how bad of a driver I am. During that process she ran a red light and hit a car. FML

by Anonymous / 10/31/2011 at 12:12am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

Today, I punched myself in the face while trying to eat a GoGurt. FML

by yum yogurt / 10/30/2011 at 4:15pm / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw my upstairs neighbor outside getting the mail. She asked how my day was, and then apologized that the sound of her baby's crying through the walls kept me up last night. Apparently she heard me when I yelled at 2am for her fucking demon spawn to shut up. FML

by Deborah / 10/27/2011 at 2:41am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, there was no toilet paper left, so I asked my grandmother if I could use her Kleenex tissues. I found out too late that they were Vicks vapor rub tissues. My crotch has been burning for the last half hour. FML

by lanikai610 / 10/26/2011 at 2:35pm / United States / Health