Nutty4Muffs

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Nutty4Muffs

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : ,
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 873
  • Number of comments : 145
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Nutty4Muffs : I had something typed up here, but realized how fucking lame it was.

Nutty4Muffs's page activity

Visits<b>Tymaster5</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 8:58pm<b>year2015</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 9:24pm<b>Nooblah</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 6:42am<b>nineteen99</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 10:14am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 11:36am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/09/2014 at 5:03am<b>MeTheBeast</b> - the 10/05/2013 at 5:20pm<b>CoodBeeWorse</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 3:45pm<b>Mmenzziieee</b> - the 04/20/2013 at 2:35am

Nutty4Muffs's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

Nutty4Muffs's favorite FMLs

Today, my parents made a list of all the things they could have done had I not been born. FML

by theunborn / 06/19/2012 at 12:42pm / France (Midi-Pyrenees) / Intimacy

Today, I tripped and fell on the sidewalk. As I did, a car that was passing by stopped, made a U-turn, and then came back so the people inside could laugh at me. When they were done taunting me, they made another U-turn and continued back in their original direction. FML

by Anonymous / 06/18/2012 at 10:39am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at work when a co-worker decided it would be funny to email me from my boss's computer to tell me I had been laid off. It wasn't funny when I was fired for real after "skipping work without giving notice." FML

by Adam Jensen / 06/18/2012 at 12:39am / United States (Minnesota) / Work

Today, I decided to motivate myself to workout by looking at a picture of a guy with a six-pack on my computer screen while doing abs. My dad walked in after I finished and was still breathing heavily from working out. FML

by NotGay / 06/16/2012 at 1:45am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was cashiering, and a customer's change came to $5.51. She looked pretty stinking rich, so I just gave her $5.50. She demanded the extra penny, and I asked if she really needed it. She said, "No, but they do, asshole," and dropped her $5.51 in the charity donation box. FML

by ouch / 06/13/2012 at 12:00pm / United States (Florida) / Money

Today, I was at a big family reunion at my aunt's place. Before dinner, I went outside in the garden for a smoke. Through the kitchen window, I saw my cousin spit in the soup. Twice. My aunt patted his back and continued stirring. FML

by eww / 06/13/2012 at 2:13am / Austria (Wien) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was texting my girlfriend and asked her for a picture, expecting something provocative. She sent me a picture of her holding a positive pregnancy test. We had sex once. FML

by Anonymous / 06/09/2012 at 12:51am / United States (Mississippi) / Love

Today, after a very painful mouth surgery, I went home to take a nap. Then my nose started bleeding, so I stuck a tissue in it and fell asleep. When I woke up, I was so high from painkillers that when I saw the tissue, I thought it was a ghost. I screamed so loud I burst a stitch. FML

by LaurenB / 06/07/2012 at 2:12pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Health

Today, my husband and I were pulled over by a cop. He was still angry from our earlier argument over his constant freeloading, and when the cop told him we'd been doing 75 in a 55, he retorted, "Yeah? I did 75 in your mom last night, fuzzball." One more ticket I have to pay for. FML

by me / 05/18/2012 at 10:41pm / United States (Michigan) / Money

Today, I was at my job life-guarding, when a woman pushed the spine-board over, hitting me on the back of my head. She laughed, but I now have a concussion and a stiff neck, and my co-workers can't stop laughing at the "irony." FML

by Anonymous / 05/08/2012 at 10:00am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I realized that in my relationship with my significant other, the roles are switched. We went out for a nice dinner, I paid, and when we got home he "had a headache" and asked for an aspirin so he could go to sleep. FML

by Damnit / 11/17/2011 at 1:11pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in an elevator with my girlfriend when it suddenly stopped. Thinking of being spontaneous like in all the movies, I propped her up on the railings and started getting passionate. That's when the emergency phone rang. And I discovered there was a security camera. FML

by Anonymous / 11/05/2011 at 8:04pm / Reserved / Intimacy

Today, a neo-Nazi stopped me and commented on my blue eyes and blonde hair. He went on to explain that I could be "pure", and should follow him and other Aryans in the campaign to eliminate Jews, and other "abominations". Good thing he didn't see the Star of David necklace around my neck. FML

by KaySchrages92 / 10/24/2011 at 9:46pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to perform a skit in my class in which I have to wear tight spandex compression shorts. The class laughed pretty hard, and I felt like I had done a good job. Afterward, a girl I have a crush on said, "So the stereotype about Asian guys IS true." Through the fluorescent lights you could see my junk. FML

by spandex / 03/24/2009 at 2:47am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous