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NuTrees's favorite FMLs
by nickthetank / 12/31/2011 at 4:21am / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Intimacy
Today, I left work early, and discovered I was locked out of my house. I subsequently had to use a spoon I found on the ground to smash the bathroom window. I cut my leg on the glass when I climbed through. While inspecting the wound, I felt a lump in my pocket. It was my house key. FML
by Anonymous / 12/29/2011 at 10:07pm / China / Miscellaneous
by OH COME ON / 12/29/2011 at 10:48am / United States (New York) / Health
by Anonymous / 12/28/2011 at 12:03pm / United Kingdom (Sheffield) / Miscellaneous
Today, I locked my keys in my car at a gas station. A man stopped to help me with a wire hanger. After about 20 min in the freezing weather, he was getting close to unlocking it when I looked over at the passenger door to see that it was unlocked. All the doors were unlocked but the driver's side. FML
by GeriGeriBoBeri / 12/28/2011 at 3:59am / United States / Transportation
Today, after spending months learning how to play the guitar and memorizing the music to my girlfriend's all-time favorite song, I performed it for her. Her response? "Well, you kind of ruined that song for me now." FML
by tommy / 12/20/2011 at 5:41pm / United States (Georgia) / Love
Today, I had a meeting at work with my board of directors for a potential promotion. When one of them told a joke, I politely let out an amused snort. Then, I noticed my director's white shirt and tie covered in red splatter. I nose bled all over the director of my company. FML
by Marie / 06/08/2009 at 2:51pm / United States (Arizona) / Work
- 1Today, after two weeks of trying to convince my parents to go to my high school graduation. They… 2Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 3Today, my flatmate came home from a date with the same guy that I have been in love with since high…