NuTrees

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NuTrees

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 24 August 1992 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3074
  • Number of comments : 222
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About NuTrees : Im only here for the popcorn

NuTrees's page activity

Visits<b>EevieBear</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 7:42pm<b>Torvaltz</b> - the 04/20/2016 at 12:30pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 12:03am<b>marshm610</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 12:45pm<b>kuraifenshi</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 7:11pm<b>anonymousyogi1</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 10:34pm<b>Ramisme</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 7:06pm<b>threer</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 1:34pm<b>RawrPancaked</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 2:30pm<b>imightbeobama</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 4:39pm<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 11/06/2015 at 11:31pm<b>DatBacon28</b> - the 10/09/2015 at 5:40am<b>IridianShadow</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 4:20pm<b>firefox9778</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 2:17am<b>zetasquared</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 1:07am<b>Flippier999</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 6:27am<b>tournamentdecide</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 5:24pm<b>TimeBandit17</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 7:22pm

Fucked!<b>TimeBandit17</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 1:22am

NuTrees's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of NuTrees's badges

NuTrees's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a dream I was on the toilet taking the longest piss known to man. Unfortunately, it was partially true. FML

by geez_wth / 05/06/2012 at 7:54am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, feeling desperate, I asked my dad for advice on how to get a girl. He asked me why I want to even date. I panicked and said I just wanted to make someone happy. He told me that if I wanted to make someone happy, I should "just start by getting a goddamn vasectomy". FML

by AnonymousUser / 05/04/2012 at 8:01pm / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, I received a text from the guy I'm into, thanking me for helping him drunkenly stumble back to his apartment last night. He ended it with, "How long did you stay?" Apparently, he doesn't remember confessing his secret love for me, or the fantastic kiss that followed. FML

by Aus / 04/26/2012 at 10:43am / United States / Love

Today, I had to explain to a potential client that I wouldn't represent him, because suing his neighbor for calling him a pansy would get us laughed out of court and likely get me disbarred. His response was to get violent and threaten to sue me for violating his civil rights. FML

by A Henderson / 04/25/2012 at 4:50pm / United States / Work

Today, due to nervousness, I threw up while proposing to my girlfriend. FML

by Anonymous / 04/23/2012 at 5:51am / United States / Love

Today, I found out that my lovely amazing boyfriend likes to pee in everything other than the toilet. This includes: Hawaiian punch jugs, the sink, empty cans/bottles and out of my window. FML

by Anonymous / 04/23/2012 at 12:44am / United States / Love

Today, my boyfriend said he was going to give me breakfast in bed before he left. He walked over, threw some granola bars on the bed next to me and left. FML

by still hungry / 04/21/2012 at 9:04am / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I had to explain to my neighbor that not all black people are lactose intolerant. His eyes still bulge out every time I eat cheese. FML

Today, while driving home, I realized I forgot my house key. Luckily, when I arrived home, someone had already broken into my house. Guess I didn't need the key. FML

by yuuupyup / 04/17/2012 at 8:55pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was Skyping with this kid, when his girlfriend started arguing with him. They do this every other week, and there was a bet on when they'd finally break up. I egged the guy on and told him not to take her shit. She ended up dumping him. Now I feel like an asshole, and all for a lousy $20. FML

by c*nt / 04/13/2012 at 7:14pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I was bragging about how I had lost 10 pounds. Grinning, I pulled my shirt up and tried to show how big my jeans were on me. Instead, the button flew off my pants. FML

by Anonymous / 04/13/2012 at 6:32am / United States / Health

Today, I caught myself staring at my grandmother's cleavage. FML

by bman / 04/07/2012 at 2:41am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, I was fooling around with my husband on the bed. I was excited as he lifted my arms up in a seductive way, only to roll deodorant under my armpits. FML

by SG / 03/24/2012 at 8:14am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I got back to work at my hospital after some sick leave. The first jackass to waste my time was a guy with leg lacerations. This, he claimed, was because he tried to break a samurai sword over his leg as part of a bet. It's day one and already I want to kill myself. FML

by Simms / 03/13/2012 at 10:32pm / United States / Work

Today, I hooked up with my ex-girlfriend, after she confessed to still being in love with me. I logged into Facebook after she left, only to find her status set to "I think I just made a big mistake." FML

by Anonymous / 03/13/2012 at 7:12pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy