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Norvi's favorite FMLs
Today, while working as a hostess, one of my tattoos on my leg was showing. It's not uncommon for guests to comment on tattoos as we're high end and I'm one of two staff members with visible tattoos. What is uncommon is an elderly lady hiking up my skirt for a better view. I flashed everyone. FML
by Devlynfly / 02/24/2016 at 11:32pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work
Today, on a train, I nearly choked while sleeping with my mouth wide open. The little old lady sitting opposite me was entertaining herself by throwing little pieces of balled-up tin foil into my mouth. FML
by Anonyme / 04/24/2014 at 2:57am / France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur) / Transportation
Today, while driving, I saw a dog run across the road. Feeling sorry for the pup on a cold, rainy night, I pulled my car over to pick it up. Once in, it started freaking out so I turned on the light. It was then that I realized I'd just put a wild coyote on my passenger seat. FML
by molliciousj / 02/19/2014 at 12:09am / United States (Texas) / Animals
Today, my elderly neighbor along with our community church's priest came to my house and demanded to "give them the girl". The girl is my 3-year-old daughter, who has natural born red irises and is photo-sensitive. And yes, we are also Romanian. FML
by OakStake / 12/08/2013 at 5:07pm / United States (New York) / Kids
by Lilly / 10/02/2013 at 8:43am / United States (Arkansas) / Love
by Ggirl / 10/01/2013 at 3:41pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Norvi / 09/14/2013 at 1:51am / South Africa (Gauteng) / Health
Today, my superior gave me a box of ethernet cables which were previously attached to mainframes storing classified data. He requested I cut them in half so that the residual data would leak out. Not only does this guy make twice my salary, there was no convincing him otherwise. We cut them up. FML
by SparkOfJade / 08/13/2013 at 12:07am / United States (Maryland) / Work
by Anonymous / 07/28/2013 at 12:59am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I decided to change my hair color. After waiting in anticipation, I took a shower to rinse out the dye and reveal my new, blue hair. Rinsing revealed not only blue hair, but blue skin caused by the watered dye running over my body. I now look like a smurf, and it's not coming out. FML
by Anonymous / 01/27/2013 at 1:10am / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous
by anon / 01/13/2013 at 10:00pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by blacktyaffair / 11/09/2011 at 9:48am / United States (Texas) / Animals
by optimistic2628 / 10/19/2011 at 10:03am / United States / Kids
by Anonymous / 11/09/2010 at 8:31pm / United States (Texas) / Animals
Today, my girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me because she said I was more of a woman than she was. I yelled out, "I HATE YOU!" and started to cry. She then took a tampon out of her purse, handed it to me, laughed, and walked away. FML
by GirlishMan1883897 / 07/24/2010 at 6:53am / United States (Connecticut) / Love
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…
- Today, My two Co-Workers and I realized that we have been working for the same company for years as… Today, I went for an operation. Only to walk out with my gallbladder still there and the news I am… Today, my mom's guilt tripping reached a new level when she told me all she wanted for her birthday…