NomOnShroomz

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NomOnShroomz

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 2734
  • Number of comments : 344
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About NomOnShroomz : Don't do drugs kids, they're all mine. I'm serious, I'll find you. Actually no, I'm to busy getting totally baked so I'll send Rico. That's right, be scared.

















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STOP! jk keep scrolling












wow are you really still scrolling?












a bit more












almost got the bacon













jk no bacon :p

NomOnShroomz's page activity

Visits<b>jr8q20</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 11:19pm<b>jill97</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 4:04am<b>jpd25</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 8:15am<b>facelick</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 7:13pm<b>shaunr40k</b> - the 12/10/2015 at 7:53pm<b>Jkalia</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 4:36pm<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 10/19/2015 at 8:32am<b>explodedtaco</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 8:28am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 4:46pm<b>One_Way</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 3:00am<b>thefmlman2011</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 6:11pm<b>WeakYoungTeen</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 5:20pm<b>Kidjazzin</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 7:35pm<b>senor_octubre</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 12:04pm<b>Mezzacarina</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 11:03am<b>S13rra01257</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 11:01pm<b>HuskyisCool</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 8:29pm<b>davisjenny81</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 1:19pm

Fucked!<b>jr8q20</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 5:19am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 10:46pm<b>senor_octubre</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 6:04pm

NomOnShroomz's FML badges

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Perfectionist

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NomOnShroomz's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom learned how to use the text messaging on her smartphone. I've received 37 already, and she calls after every single one to make sure I understood her. FML

by Anonymous / 11/02/2011 at 11:15am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom learned how to use the text messaging on her smartphone. I've received 37 already, and she calls after every single one to make sure I understood her. FML

by Anonymous / 11/02/2011 at 11:15am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I overheard my dad telling his work buddy that he's disappointed in his kid. I assumed he meant my brother, for flunking out of school. He meant me, for quitting sports to focus on my studies. FML

by Anonymous / 11/02/2011 at 10:43am / United States (Minnesota) / Kids

Today, I overheard my dad telling his work buddy that he's disappointed in his kid. I assumed he meant my brother, for flunking out of school. He meant me, for quitting sports to focus on my studies. FML

by Anonymous / 11/02/2011 at 10:43am / United States (Minnesota) / Kids

Today, I yelled at my boyfriend for smoking in the house, because I didn't want the house to smell like smoke. While doing so, I knocked over a candle and lit the couch on fire. FML

by S. Bauer / 11/02/2011 at 9:50am / Portugal / Love

Today, at work I asked a cute, albeit slightly large customer, her name. Being hard of hearing, I thought she said "Porky" and asked her about it. Turns out she'd said Courtney. FML

by Anonymous / 11/02/2011 at 3:12am / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I went to my boyfriend's apartment to break up with him since he's always busy, and I haven't seen or spoke to him in almost 2 months. I arrived to find out from his landlord that he'd moved out 3 weeks ago, leaving a note saying that we were over. FML

by melikeyturtles / 11/02/2011 at 1:21am / United States / Love

Today, while spooning my spouse, I was awakened in the wee hours by a huge, junk-rattling fart. This has happened numerous times since she became a vegetarian. FML

by steve-o / 11/02/2011 at 1:06am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my fiancé decided he wants to buy an engagement ring for his mother, so that she doesn't feel left out. FML

by heatherjo / 11/02/2011 at 12:49am / United States / Love

Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, I heard a notification on my iPhone. I thought nothing of it until we were done, and then I checked it out. My mom had posted on my Facebook, telling me that if I didn't keep it down, she was going to come up to my room. FML

by ugadawgs09 / 11/02/2011 at 12:32am / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy

Today, I was trying to get my boyfriend in the mood so I held his hands against the bed, and whispered, "Have you been a bad boy?" Thinking he'd say something kinky back, he replied "Yes Santa" then burst out laughing. FML

by HOe HOe HOe / 11/01/2011 at 10:36pm / United States (Hawaii) / Intimacy

Today, I got my period. Last week, I fell out of a window and landed between my legs on a bush; I have massive swelling down there, and stitches over the ripped flesh. Now I'm bleeding out my period on top of the lingering wounds down there. It hurts even to pee, let alone menstruate. FML

by stitchesupmyass / 11/01/2011 at 5:50pm / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, my license to carry a gun expired because my manager forgot to renew it. As I'm an armored car guard, this is a problem. In order to keep getting hours, my company transferred me to the coin vault. I just finished moving 15000 lbs of boxed coins. By hand. I'm stuck doing this for a month. FML

Today, I was hurriedly doing laundry. I threw a second load in the dryer and slammed the door shut. All of a sudden, I heard scratching and whining coming from the dryer. My cat probably hates me now. FML

by benji / 11/01/2011 at 3:02pm / United States (Michigan) / Animals

Today, I went grocery shopping. Being a bartender, I had a huge wad of dollar bills from cash tips. As I was counting them at the register, I looked at the cashier and joked, "You probably think I'm a stripper or something." He looked me up and down and said, "Uh... hell no." FML

by bakedplum / 11/01/2011 at 1:52pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous