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Niqhtware

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Niqhtware
  • Town/Country : Toronto, Canada
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 8 September 1992 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 925
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Niqhtware : I like turtles.

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Niqhtware's favorite FMLs

Today, I celebrated my birthday with a few friends at home. As I bent down over my cake, my friend pushed my face into it. The baker should have told me she put in a stick to support the cake. FML

#15914816
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33387) - you deserved it (2886)

On 04/25/2011 at 1:01am - misc - by Mr. Headshot -

Today, I was on a three hour flight to Los Angeles for a corporate meeting. The woman next to me instantly fell asleep and snored louder than a freight train, while the kid behind me made a hobby of thashing my seat from behind. When I peered over and asked him to stop, he spat in my face. FML

#15887024
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31077) - you deserved it (2992)

On 04/22/2011 at 2:43pm - work - by Ashleigh - United States (Connecticut)

Today, at work, I spent half an hour trying to convince an elderly customer that no, I wasn't a messenger sent by the devil to take her soul to hell. FML

#15857597
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30611) - you deserved it (2981)

On 04/20/2011 at 10:15am - work - by rawr -

Today, I told my son that his grades are dropping and his behavior is getting out of hand. To which he replied, "Yeah, so is your weight." FML

#15843459
333 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35364) - you deserved it (14967)

On 04/19/2011 at 2:38am - kids - by randa -

Today, I had to take a mandatory drug test with the doctor present. Nervous, I couldn't get myself to pee in the cup right away. When I finally did, I couldn't stop myself from overfilling the cup and getting pee all over myself. FML

#15811020
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26367) - you deserved it (7617)

On 04/16/2011 at 6:20pm - health - by overflowing - United States (Texas)

Today, while relaxing in the kitchen drinking coffee, my dad suddenly rushed in, knocking me over and causing me to spill boiling hot coffee all over myself. Then, my dad thought it would be a good idea to grab the sprayer from the sink and douse me with cold water in order to "put me out." FML

#15805377
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24974) - you deserved it (3267)

On 04/16/2011 at 8:46am - misc - by inalotofpain (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after receiving the third call this week from teachers about my son falling asleep in class, I decided that it would be a good idea to hide his Xbox controllers. He decided it would be a good idea to hide my diabetes medication. FML

#15805325
384 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41414) - you deserved it (16676)

On 04/16/2011 at 8:35am - health - by bbedlock (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I ran a red light in front of a cop and got pulled over. My friend thought it would be funny to throw a knife in my lap and scream "Help me officer, he has a knife!" FML

#15773415
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38523) - you deserved it (5132)

On 04/13/2011 at 6:57pm - misc - by FrOsTy25 -

Today, at 6am I was waiting for the tram to go home from my late night job. A homeless man came up to me and offered to buy me a beer because "guys like us have to stick together." FML

#15754863
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24967) - you deserved it (3474)

On 04/12/2011 at 12:02pm - misc - by ihaveahome (man) - Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha)

Today, my dad set my hair on fire while cooking. He then tried to convince me that it spontaneously combusted. FML

#15748072
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24540) - you deserved it (2252)

On 04/11/2011 at 11:07pm - health - by ILiveWithMorons (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I realized that my boyfriend does not stop by my apartment to give me a kiss between classes. He is actually stopping by between his classes to steal my condoms because he is too cheap to pay for them when he cheats on me. FML

#15740141
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54160) - you deserved it (4055)

On 04/11/2011 at 12:57pm - intimacy - by Carmen - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, a stoned man tried to break into my house. Naked. FML

#15719480
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35518) - you deserved it (3973)

On 04/10/2011 at 2:05am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I finally confessed my feelings to my long time crush. He was the only one I've been able to muster up the courage to open up to. He replied "lmao" and hasn't texted back since. FML

#15700119
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31622) - you deserved it (5920)

On 04/08/2011 at 9:39pm - love - by notfunny - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was making love to my wife from behind. As we both reached climax at the same time, she threw her head back in ecstasy just as I buckled forward with pleasure. We slammed our heads together, effectively ending our orgasms. FML

#15636235
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37371) - you deserved it (10492)

On 04/04/2011 at 2:29pm - intimacy - by Abyssal (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I had diarrhea in a public bathroom. When I was finished, I noticed that someone had pissed all over the toilet paper. FML

#15630869
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38501) - you deserved it (4002)

On 04/04/2011 at 1:26am - health - by Anonymous -



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