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Niqhtware's favorite FMLs
by rileycrash / 05/19/2011 at 10:08pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by Username / 05/19/2011 at 6:46pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, it was my first day as an animal control officer. My first dispatch was to collect a dog that had been hit by a car. I had to clean up my dead dog on my first day of a job that barely pays rent. FML
by Anonymous / 05/18/2011 at 10:48pm / United States (Georgia) / Work
Today, I was at Walmart with my mom, when a guy next to me let out a series of vicious farts. Assuming it was me, my mom chewed me out in front of the guy and made me apologize. The man looked at my mom and said, "Children, they're so immature." FML
by nicknick2 / 05/18/2011 at 12:08pm / United States (Delaware) / Miscellaneous
Today, my girlfriend of 1 month came over and told me she wanted to talk to me. We sat down on the couch and she told me she was pregnant and that it was mine. I reminded her that we've never slept together. FML
by Jackedup / 05/18/2011 at 3:57am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by anonymous / 05/17/2011 at 1:34pm / United States (Mississippi) / Money
by Username / 05/17/2011 at 12:05am / Miscellaneous
by pyroman1127 / 05/16/2011 at 3:34pm / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous
by Bobby M / 05/16/2011 at 12:33pm / Ireland (Carlow) / Health
Today, I skipped school and stayed home without telling my parents. My mom came home on her lunch break with another man, and had sex in our living room. I'm stuck in my room, listening to my mom cheat on my dad. FML
by ali grace / 05/14/2011 at 7:15am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by Monika / 05/05/2011 at 5:04pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids
by missmirror / 05/02/2011 at 7:00pm / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/29/2011 at 2:29am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/27/2011 at 12:21pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, my energetic 10-month-old decided to stay up four hours past bedtime. After I FINALLY got…