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Niqhtware

Offline (the 08/31/2014 at 6:11pm) | Search for a member

Niqhtware

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 8 September 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1244
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Niqhtware : I like turtles.

Niqhtware's page activity

Visits<b>Jishiku</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 4:45am<b>NickaPLZ</b> - the 02/14/2013 at 1:22pm<b>eccentrix</b> - the 07/18/2012 at 3:52am

Niqhtware's FML badges

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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Niqhtware's favorite FMLs

Today, I was breaking into a house when three police cruisers pulled up. They ran my social, my license plates, and asked me twenty minutes worth of questions, before allowing me to go back to work. I work as a locksmith; the homeowner had lost their keys. FML

#18968105
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34986) - you deserved it (3230)

On 02/01/2012 at 11:11am - work - by ABBenzin (man) - United States

Today, I was driving back home with my family. I had to sit quietly for half an hour, all while pretending I didn't notice my sister playing with herself under the coat on her lap. FML

#18891781
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41145) - you deserved it (3374)

On 01/23/2012 at 5:36pm - intimacy - by jjs51 (man) - United States

Today, a man crashed into my car. He then got out of his car, dug a toothbrush and toothpaste out of his bag, and tried to brush away the damage. FML

#18851761
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27052) - you deserved it (1930)

On 01/19/2012 at 7:17am - misc - by toothpaste (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I started a new medication, not paying much notice to the one side effect: "unusual vaginal secretions". They're unusual alright, they glued my underwear to my skin. FML

#18812557
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33000) - you deserved it (3749)

On 01/15/2012 at 4:00am - intimacy - by involuntary waxing - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I started a new medication, not paying much notice to the one side effect: "unusual vaginal secretions". They're unusual alright, they glued my underwear to my skin. FML

#18812557
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33000) - you deserved it (3749)

On 01/15/2012 at 4:00am - intimacy - by involuntary waxing - Canada (Alberta)

Today, this girl I liked made her Facebook status "Nobody texts me anymore, message me numbers?" I commented that I texted her. She deleted it and changed it to "Nobody that I care about texts me anymore, message me numbers?" FML

#18811640
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37881) - you deserved it (3406)

On 01/15/2012 at 1:24am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was on the train listening to my iPod on shuffle. The "Oompa Loompa" song came on, and slightly amused, I started humming it. It wasn't until I noticed that the man next to me was a midget that I understood the horrified looks I was getting. FML

#18716043
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33127) - you deserved it (9174)

On 01/05/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by lorahayes (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I was going over to my friend's house for the first time. A creepy-looking old man answered, and smiled at me. I asked "Is this the right house? Does Isaac live here?" He replied "Yes, he's in the basement. Would you like a drink?" Right then, Isaac called and asked me where I was. FML

#18671217
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46683) - you deserved it (3234)

On 01/01/2012 at 2:34am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him for the first time. His response was to smile and pat me on the head. FML

#18533113
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27497) - you deserved it (4430)

On 12/17/2011 at 1:49am - love - by teejayrn - United States

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML

#18483356
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48537) - you deserved it (7725)

On 12/11/2011 at 6:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while standing completely still at Walmart, I was hit by a drunk man on a Jazzy Scooter. He laughed, said it was an accident, gunned the scooter and took out two more people. FML

#18459479
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23284) - you deserved it (2295)

On 12/08/2011 at 9:48am - misc - by skidmark (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I dressed up as Santa Claus for my employees' children. After seeing all the others, my daughter's turn arrived. She sat on my lap, put her lips to my ear, and whispered softly: "I want a new dad." FML

#18418543
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55234) - you deserved it (5529) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/03/2011 at 11:24am - kids - by perenoel - France

Today, I saw my dad for the first time in ten years. He was stealing my car. FML

#18409313
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41914) - you deserved it (2272)

On 12/02/2011 at 1:15am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, after three days of getting stared at by my neighbour from the window, I realized that she wasn't alive anymore. FML

#18406735
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43201) - you deserved it (3239)

On 12/01/2011 at 9:02pm - health - by unknown52 - Netherlands (Overijssel)

Today, I caught my mother trying to text on her iPhone, with her nipple. FML

#18364433
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37516) - you deserved it (3088)

On 11/27/2011 at 6:46am - misc - by Anonymous - Denmark (Hovedstaden)



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