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Niqhtware

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Niqhtware
  • Town/Country : Toronto, Canada
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 8 September 1992 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 928
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Niqhtware : I like turtles.

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Niqhtware's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at Target with my mom and we finished purchasing our items. We had gotten a fan so I said, "This thing is too big to fit in." First thing my mom yells? "THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!" and starts laughing hysterically in front of the entire store. FML

#3692539
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44212) - you deserved it (11185)

On 07/12/2009 at 2:25pm - misc - by embarrassed (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I asked a buddy of mine if he wanted to see a movie. He said he was busy that day, so I decided to go alone. Midway through, the couple behind me is making out and kicking my seat. I turn around, and it's my ex-girlfriend making out with my buddy. FML

#3601601
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47570) - you deserved it (2700)

On 07/09/2009 at 1:49am - misc - by frankfukhergood - Canada

Today, I had sex with this guy who I like very much. As he went to leave I decided to give him one last thrill. So I reached down his pants and started to rub and stroke him. He abruptly pulled my hand out, when I asked why, he points behind me, my mom watched the whole thing. FML

#3143292
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21016) - you deserved it (53212)

On 06/23/2009 at 11:14am - intimacy - by wastedlove (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was cashiering at Target when an old woman came into my checkout line. Her items? Variety pack of pleasuring condoms, a bottle of KY sensual lube, and two colorful thongs. As I'm scanning these, she leans in and whispers, "I love toys." FML

#3129056
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46269) - you deserved it (2661)

On 06/22/2009 at 8:21pm - work - by the_captain (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was taking calls at the helpdesk I work at. The caller was a man, and while helping him with his issue he suddenly stopped to tell me I had a nice soothing voice. Then he told me to say something else. As I continued to help him, he started making moaning noises. I'm a guy. FML

#2372451
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48721) - you deserved it (2782)

On 05/28/2009 at 12:52pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I kissed my husband and said "I love you." Thats when our 5 year old son said to my husband "How can you love her so much if she's so ugly?" FML

#2158640
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51702) - you deserved it (2681)

On 05/21/2009 at 8:20pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was at the water park with my boyfriend. We were getting on a two-person tube slide. As I went to sit in the front I noticed the lifeguard looking me up and down, what I assumed was him checking me out. I found out I was wrong when he said, "Heaviest in back." FML

#2040967
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42999) - you deserved it (7060)

On 05/18/2009 at 1:48am - health - by barbie (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of 2 years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML

#1604682
305 comments

I agree, your life sucks (247875) - you deserved it (14287)

On 05/03/2009 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was fingering my girlfriend. When suddenly she started crying at the peak of her orgasm, when I asked what was wrong, she replied. "I-I-I MISS HIM!" She was crying about her ex boyfriend. While I was inside her. FML

#1453860
315 comments

I agree, your life sucks (137012) - you deserved it (10240)

On 04/29/2009 at 11:47am - intimacy - by fingerfuckd (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got a text from my girlfriend saying she needed more phone credit, so I bought her more and got another message saying "Great, now I have enough credit for this..." as she spelled out a three page message breaking up with me. Yes, I paid for her to break up with me via text. FML

#1219528
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65966) - you deserved it (5659)

On 04/22/2009 at 11:26am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I bought a brand new flat screen TV. When I brought it home it didn't work. Furious, I walked into Best Buy and yelled at a guy in a tucked in blue polo and khakis. I asked him why it didn't work and he said he didn't know. I kept screaming. He didn't have a nametag. He didn't work there. FML

#1101827
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9102) - you deserved it (91636)

On 04/18/2009 at 10:44pm - misc - by asdfghjkl (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I finally got some sleep after an exterminator came yesterday and took care of our roach problem. I woke up and kissed my boyfriend good morning. Frowning, he told me I had something stuck on the corner of my mouth. It was a roach leg. Where is the rest of the roach? FML

#1056557
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (86234) - you deserved it (3809)

On 04/17/2009 at 2:43pm - misc - by wellesleybanana (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had a really cute waitress at lunch. I decided to leave my number and a $50 bill for a $15 check. When I left the restaurant I realized I still had the $50 but a $1 bill was missing from my wallet. I've been getting threatening text messages all day. FML

#829368
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14275) - you deserved it (55817)

On 04/06/2009 at 1:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)



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