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Today, I had to repeat my order in Starbucks three times because the barista was staring at my chest. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19081) - you deserved it (10020)
On 01/13/2011 at 11:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland
Today, I was cleaning one of my elderly patient's teeth. After finishing and reminding her to floss, I realised she had died. Supposedly she was dead for a good 20 minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53906) - you deserved it (3801)
On 12/02/2010 at 8:20am - love - by mrdentist -
Today, I realized I've been playing too much Call of Duty. I started screaming, "Spawn, b*tch! Spawn!" at my microwavable pizza while it was in the microwave. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9844) - you deserved it (44510)
On 11/13/2010 at 12:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, while at dinner, I told my boyfriend that I wished he liked sushi. He replied, 'I wish you liked anal.' FML
I agree, your life sucks (15868) - you deserved it (27897)
On 11/12/2010 at 11:31am - intimacy - by lisacasabonita (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. After removing my underwear, he started singing "In the jungle, the mighty jungle..." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20675) - you deserved it (37523)
On 07/21/2010 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by Wawawiwa (woman) - Namibia (Windhoek)
Today, I was asked to take care of my 3 year old little brother. After 15 minutes of him screaming and me trying to keep him entertained, he started throwing his toy cars at me. He hit me in the mouth, and I started to bleed. My parents yelled at me for "not controlling him." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20045) - you deserved it (2559)
On 03/01/2010 at 2:09pm - kids - by moneyman22 - United States (New York)
Today, I got a random text from a woman containing many naked pictures of her. Apparently she meant to send those to her boyfriend whose number is one digit from mine. The bad part? My girlfriend was using my phone when I received that message. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35412) - you deserved it (1813)
On 11/22/2009 at 3:23pm - misc - by anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I was at a party with my boyfriend of one year when an attractive girl walks over. She asks him, "Is this your girlfriend?" He replied "That depends... are you single?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (35327) - you deserved it (2501)
On 11/22/2009 at 12:49pm - love - by Rejected. (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)
Today, I got a call from my parents' divorce lawyer. When I answered the phone, she thought I was my mother and told me the details about my parent's divorce. I'm a 13-year-old boy who sounds like a woman and just learned that my parents are separating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52875) - you deserved it (2424)
On 08/07/2009 at 11:57pm - misc - by madaskueuchiha (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was having sex with this girl I met in stats class when my roommate walked in. He started applauding and said, "$20 bucks for me! I knew you weren't gay!" Him and my other roommate had a bet. They are my best friends. FML
I agree, your life sucks (71824) - you deserved it (6225)
On 03/31/2009 at 11:35am - intimacy - by CBBP (man) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I was telling my boyfriend I had fake orgasms all the time to piss him off. He replied: "that's okay, I'm f***ing three other girls." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42248) - you deserved it (103928)
On 03/05/2009 at 1:01am - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my grandmother patched up my $300, vintage, limited edition, designer jeans because she thought I'd accidentally ripped them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32283) - you deserved it (74228)
On 03/04/2009 at 12:40am - money - by ch (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I forgot to do my French homework, but since it was an online worksheet, I told my teacher my internet wasn't working. I told her with an e-mail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53332) - you deserved it (585887)
On 02/28/2009 at 2:07pm - misc - by ihavepinkbackpac (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was a TA for a history class and the class was taking a test. About halfway through, I noticed one kid had a small piece of paper in his hand. I ran up the row, grabbed his test, and ripped it into four pieces. Then I took the note from him. It said "I believe in you, -Mom." FML
I agree, your life sucks (55598) - you deserved it (324136)
On 02/26/2009 at 10:30am - work - by Noname - United States (Michigan)
Today, after a party, I brought a girl to the flat I share with my 2 best friends. While we are doing it, she asks me "You're not afraid your friends could hear us?". The only answer that spontaneously came out of my mouth: "Don't worry, they're used to it". FML
I agree, your life sucks (12705) - you deserved it (63305)
On 10/27/2008 at 12:57am - intimacy - by Daemon - Sent from mobile version
Monday 20 May 2013
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