About Nimmrodel : Im a pretty happy person most of the time.
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Nimmrodel's favorite FMLs
Today, I picked up on a telemarketer and started speaking in Portuguese. It turns out that this particular telemarketer spoke it as well. Every time I hung up, he called back. Telemarketers get really excited when they find out someone else speaks their language. FML
by Anonymous / 04/19/2011 at 11:05pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by B / 04/18/2011 at 4:09am / United Kingdom (Essex) / Kids
by Anonymous / 04/17/2011 at 11:12pm / United States (South Carolina) / Intimacy
by wellhellothere / 04/17/2011 at 3:25am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
by rastafarimon / 04/17/2011 at 1:56am / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy
by uncool / 04/16/2011 at 2:11am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I bumped into an old school friend. I'd heard she was pregnant so the first thing I did was congratulate her. Not only was she not pregnant, but the reason she managed to get so fat was because of comfort eating due to her miscarriage last month. FML
by Anonymous / 04/13/2011 at 9:06pm / United Kingdom / Health
Today, I freaked out when the remote wouldn't unlock my car. I stood in the rain trying to open the door. Unsure of what to do next, I called my boyfriend. He told me to "put the key in the door". I had forgotten about that option. FML
by andimanastudent / 04/13/2011 at 5:44pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Transportation
Today, I was watching TV and started freaking out thinking I forgot to tell my boyfriend happy anniversary. I wrote him a text and after it sent, I realized the date is mine and my ex's anniversary date. FML
by Zebracat / 04/13/2011 at 2:15am / United States / Love
Today, the girl I was babysitting was being disrespectful to me, so I took away her stuffed animal and told her that she couldn't have it back until she apologized. She ended up sneaking onto my laptop and deleting all the pictures I'd saved from my recent vacation to Europe. FML
by Got_any_grapes1 / 04/11/2011 at 1:23pm / United States (Florida) / Kids
Today, I realized that my boyfriend does not stop by my apartment to give me a kiss between classes. He is actually stopping by between his classes to steal my condoms because he is too cheap to pay for them when he cheats on me. FML
by Carmen / 04/11/2011 at 12:57pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy
Today, I bought myself a brand-new 52" flatscreen. It was only in my house for 2 hours before my toddler had a tantrum, threw a toy right into the screen and wrecked it beyond repair. I paid to have a nice TV for 2 hours. FML
by ac32 / 04/11/2011 at 12:05pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids
by anonymous / 04/10/2011 at 11:26pm / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I've stopped smoking, lost 30 pounds, taken several painful tests, and checked my ovulation…