About NessieMonster188 : For all those FMLers who care to read this:
-I am a former Canadian. So before you begin to complain to me about below freezing weather, please consider I lived in an igloo for quite some time and my only means of transportation were by moose and polar bear.
-I may only be a teenager, but this does not give you the right to treat me as some immature delinquent. Surprisingly enough, I could be the total opposite.
-I'm nice to everyone, but please note I have a short tolerance when someone annoys me constantly. Don't say I didn't warn you.
-I am a rubix cube for the colourblind: impossible to figure out.
-In my free time I like to write poetry, play American football, race cars, and watch anime
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Socialite
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, one of my closest friends informed me that she wasn't going to invite me to her wedding, because I'm too shy and not enough fun, and she doesn't want her 200 or so guests to feel uncomfortable. I was the one who set the happy couple up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42465) - you deserved it (2844)
On 05/23/2013 at 9:45am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)
Today, my nose started running while in bed with my boyfriend. I kept trying to wipe it off with my arm to avoid ruining the moment. My boyfriend then looks up at me in horror. Turns out it wasn't mucus; it was blood. And it was all over his neck, his shirt, and his silk sheets. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48159) - you deserved it (8788)
On 05/07/2013 at 3:29am - intimacy - by Sirah90 (woman) - United States
Today, I was proposed to, under the condition that I "get thin" first. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42126) - you deserved it (6984)
On 04/06/2013 at 11:19pm - love - by ziggers10 - United States
Today, I was walking my dog when he stopped in the middle of the street and took a dump. I looked around furtively but saw nobody, so I just kept walking. I stepped in it on the way back home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7560) - you deserved it (67578) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I was talking to my boss and he said I was awesome. He went to fist bump me and I missed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22871) - you deserved it (5863)
On 03/20/2013 at 10:31am - work - by missedfistbump - United States
Today, for the sixth time in a row, I was driving my kid to school and he made me late for work. Why? He was whacking off instead of getting ready. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33598) - you deserved it (3678)
On 03/20/2013 at 7:07am - intimacy - by Why son, why? (man) - United States
Today, four days after our fridge-freezer broke down, my husband staggered home with three bags of ham. He drunkenly bought it with most of what little money we have, so now not only is our food budget gone, we also have a metric cunt-load of ham, and nowhere to store it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25645) - you deserved it (2647)
Today, I was outside at a café and looked at my phone. When I did, a woman halfway across the patio started screaming at me, demanding I tell her who I was texting and why. She then sprinted over, furious at me for apparently badmouthing her to somebody. All I did was check the time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31807) - you deserved it (2236)
On 03/17/2013 at 7:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)
Today, I advised my daughter to not drink a Coke before bed. She smiled at me and reassured me that it could be balanced out with sleeping pills. I'm raising a future drug addict. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26480) - you deserved it (4863)
On 03/17/2013 at 6:25am - kids - by hejdixjeln - United States (Illinois)
Today, a technician from my ISP came to my house to replace my router. He asked for a glass of water, one thing led to another, and for some reason I'll never fully understand, we ended up having sex. Looks like porn logic is not so far off the mark after all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14232) - you deserved it (49656)
On 03/09/2013 at 1:50pm - intimacy - by je_regrette_tout (woman) - Sent from mobile version
Today, I walked into my near pitch-black bathroom and saw a person staring back at me. I woke my whole family up with my screams. The person was my reflection. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9230) - you deserved it (21562)
On 02/22/2013 at 12:35am - misc - by shelbylove115 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I had to use a dictionary before I realized I was being flirted with. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19362) - you deserved it (7470)
On 02/14/2013 at 6:01am - love - by lex - United States
Today, a girl came up to me on the street and said, "You have like no swag, bro." Feeling clever, I said, "At least I have a high school education." She then took out her work ID, showing me that she was a surgeon, flipped me off, then walked away saying, "This is totally going on Facebook." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23783) - you deserved it (21632)
On 02/11/2013 at 10:26am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my little sister chased me around the house with a mallet, giggling like a maniac. I ended up having to pin her to the ground, rip the mallet out of her hand and lock her in the bathroom. This isn't the first time. My mom still insists it's perfectly normal. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27671) - you deserved it (2200)
On 02/10/2013 at 11:17am - kids - by littlemiss - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I found a cup full of urine in the bathtub. No one in my family knows where it came from. This is the second time it's happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23994) - you deserved it (1530)
On 02/08/2013 at 10:36am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Friday 24 May 2013
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