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Nessa0181

Offline (the 10/21/2014 at 7:35am) | Search for a member

Nessa0181

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  • Number of visits : 397
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Nessa0181's page activity

Visits<b>ClockworkPoleaxe</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 5:19am<b>Welshite</b> - the 12/05/2013 at 2:01pm

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Nessa0181's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife created a "Points Reward" system for the privilege of sex. 10 points for doing the dishes, 20 for the laundry, etc. How many points do I need before I can have sex with her? 2300. FML

#15430260
699 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70664) - you deserved it (15325)

On 03/22/2011 at 10:59am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I were play-wrestling on the bed, when he started to tickle me. I tried to pull away but he pushed me back down. I ended up hitting my eye on the corner of the nightstand. His comment was "this is why you shouldn't struggle." FML

#15177463
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27472) - you deserved it (7134)

On 03/02/2011 at 6:43pm - misc - by taiannalynn5 -

Today, my girlfriend told me on facebook to stop calling/texting her because she lost her phone. Right under her post was "sent from facebook for iPhone." FML

#13543408
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36663) - you deserved it (4134)

On 10/21/2010 at 10:25pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was sitting in a lecture about the history of the KKK and the problems it has caused, when the weirdest and quietest kid leans over my shoulder and says "I'd burn you first..." and winks. FML

#13455190
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32567) - you deserved it (3210)

On 10/15/2010 at 2:00am - misc - by racist - United States

Today, I went into a music store to look into getting a new guitar. I picked up one that I was interested in and tried it out quietly. A sales representative approached me and asked me to "stop the noise and leave the guitars for serious customers." I've been playing for almost ten years. FML

#10777263
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32014) - you deserved it (5412)

On 05/26/2010 at 2:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, the bartender pulled me aside and told me that she saw my date slip something into my drink. Who was my date? My husband of four years. FML

#8790917
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31480) - you deserved it (2328)

On 03/03/2010 at 12:37am - misc - by holycrap (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my girlfriend told me she lost her phone and not to call or text her. After about three hours, I text her phone, asking if she found it yet. I got a reply, saying "Nope." FML

#5586348
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40532) - you deserved it (5188)

On 10/01/2009 at 4:07pm - misc - by dumbass (man) - United States (Pennsylvania) - moderated by Kevin Nealon

Today, I was at work and my mother texted me. The text read, "You take a nice picture." To which I responded, "what picture?" I then got a reply saying, "The one on your speeding ticket showing you going 73 in a 55 mph zone. You are even smiling." FML

#5337998
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8768) - you deserved it (40458)

On 09/18/2009 at 7:28pm - misc - by asdfas (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my girlfriend, who is a dog trainer, was telling me all about the techniques she uses at work. I commented on how the dogs must be stupid to fall for such simple tricks, to which she replied "They worked on you." FML

#5203249
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10257) - you deserved it (42168)

On 09/12/2009 at 8:00am - love - by TrainedBF (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, while having sex I realized two things. First, I can't remember the last time my boyfriend gave me an orgasm, and secondly I think the curtains slightly clash with the duvet cover. I was more annoyed with the second one. FML

#4527001
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44766) - you deserved it (9679)

On 08/14/2009 at 2:33pm - intimacy - by vicgal - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I received a "diamond ring" in Mafia Wars (a facebook app) from my boyfriend of 3 years. Along with the ring came a message. It read, "Will you marry me?" He was serious. FML

#3827229
376 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55070) - you deserved it (9145)

On 07/17/2009 at 8:56am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was waiting for the train. It arrived, I got on and the woman behind me stepped on the back of my shoe. My shoe came flying off and landed in the gutter between the train and the platform. The doors closed, the train pulled away. FML

#1252077
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52485) - you deserved it (2815)

On 04/23/2009 at 10:09am - misc - by Kate (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while walking to class enjoying the warmer weather, a bee flew down my shirt. I'm allergic to bees so I freaked out and started ripping my clothes off. By the time I was done, I was half naked and there was no bee in sight. Turns out, it was the string on my jacket hood. FML

#724794
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50818) - you deserved it (30573)

On 03/31/2009 at 2:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had my car stolen. When the police found it, pretty much everything inside was missing. For some reason, I had left 6 pairs of shoes in my back seat. Whoever stole my car thought it would be funny to take one shoe from each pair. I now own 6 unmatched shoes and my car smells like sex. FML

#570871
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84187) - you deserved it (5727)

On 03/24/2009 at 1:44am - intimacy - by proudestmonkey (man) - United States (Colorado)



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