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NeCKX

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NeCKX

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1940
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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NeCKX's favorite FMLs

Today, I was reading a book in German, which I don't know very well. Suddenly I reached a passage I had no trouble understanding. Excited, I showed my husband, saying I was finally getting the hang of it. He laughed and patted my head. Turns out, that particular passage was a quote. In English. FML

#18266824
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9174) - you deserved it (33162)

On 11/16/2011 at 7:37pm - misc - by dunicha - United States (Texas)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when he suddenly pulls out and says, "Pull my penis." So I pulled his penis and he farted. Then he started doing it again. FML

#18260975
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36389) - you deserved it (6895)

On 11/16/2011 at 12:27am - intimacy - by halloweed (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was following my friend to her house in my car, because I didn't know where it was. I'd been following her for at least an hour when she pulled into a gas station. Turns out I'd been following the wrong car. I have no idea where I am. FML

#18225132
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27653) - you deserved it (9408)

On 11/12/2011 at 1:43am - misc - by friedchicken - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was working the graveyard shift as a security guard. I fell asleep in my car doing paperwork around 2 am. When my supervisor came to check on me, he pounded on my window, wearing a "Scream" mask. I panicked and pepper sprayed him. Too bad my window was closed. FML

#18208389
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14620) - you deserved it (31256)

On 11/10/2011 at 6:40am - work - by copshop - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. My mum walked in and told him to pull out and show her that he was wearing a condom, and not just saying he was. FML

#18200253
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56871) - you deserved it (8430)

On 11/09/2011 at 7:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend drove me home. I mentioned how I had recently started my period and he freaked out, saying I would "leak" through my tampon onto his seat. He made me sit on towels all the way home. FML

#18196154
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36705) - you deserved it (5898)

On 11/08/2011 at 8:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my baby son latched onto my nipple for a feed, after a month of having to be bottle fed because he wouldn't latch. This would be fantastic, if it weren't for the fact that I'm his father, not his mother. FML

#18191670
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38981) - you deserved it (3859)

On 11/08/2011 at 9:01am - kids - by possiblyoverweight (man) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, as I was walking back to my dorm, I looked down and thought "I wonder why the ground is wet in just this one spot." Then I got hit with a water balloon. FML

#18180694
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25203) - you deserved it (3915)

On 11/06/2011 at 11:50pm - misc - by Kirby - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was dared to walk home through a rough part of town. My rep hung in the balance, so I accepted. A kid kicked a football in my direction, so I kicked it back at him hard. It hit him in the nuts, and the next thing I know, I'm running for my life from three bald, shirtless, six-packed thugs. FML

#18159887
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13080) - you deserved it (32515)

On 11/04/2011 at 9:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my father decided that since I'm 21 and have never had a girlfriend, he would buy me a book on how to talk to girls. The book is written by a 9-year-old kid. FML

#18154487
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28325) - you deserved it (6192)

On 11/04/2011 at 2:57am - love - by foreverashamed - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. The lights kept on going on and off. Why? The lights are activated by "clap on, clap off." It killed the mood. FML

#18150434
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33844) - you deserved it (9003)

On 11/03/2011 at 7:48pm - intimacy - by KayleeXLoVe21 - United States (New York)

Today, I went to my boyfriend's apartment to break up with him since he's always busy, and I haven't seen or spoke to him in almost 2 months. I arrived to find out from his landlord that he'd moved out 3 weeks ago, leaving a note saying that we were over. FML

#18135824
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26908) - you deserved it (7530)

On 11/02/2011 at 1:21am - love - by melikeyturtles - United States

Today, while spooning my spouse, I was awakened in the wee hours by a huge, junk-rattling fart. This has happened numerous times since she became a vegetarian. FML

#18135742
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28247) - you deserved it (3326)

On 11/02/2011 at 1:06am - misc - by steve-o - United States

Today, I learned the hard way that you should never use medical tape to secure gauze over a razor cut on your scrotum. FML

#18128181
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8444) - you deserved it (34796)

On 11/01/2011 at 10:52am - health - by pain - United States

Today, I got into my car after a long shift at work. When I looked in my rear view mirror, a horrifyingly evil face grinned at me from the back window. I leaped out of the car, only to be chased around by two people in clown masks. It turned out to be a prank set up by my co-workers. FML

#18112365
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28415) - you deserved it (3026)

On 10/30/2011 at 3:13pm - work - by Katrin - Norway



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