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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I'd just finished feeding my parrot and sweeping all the seeds under the cage. As I was walking away, my parrot whistled. I turned around to see him get up onto the food dish, pick up a clawful of food and toss it on the floor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19468) - you deserved it (3043)
On 10/06/2011 at 6:20am - misc - by kemando - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I came back home to find that my house had been robbed, one week after my neighbors. I was walking around my neighborhood to see if anything was suspicious, and discovered that my neighbors had put up a sign, reading: "Rob the neighbors, THEY don't have a security system." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25779) - you deserved it (1967)
On 10/03/2011 at 2:08am - misc - by TheAnnoyedNeighbor - United States (New York)
Today, my six-year-old got in an argument with my four-year-old. I told them to go outside. The next thing I know, my son was standing in front of his sister's burning Barbie's Malibu Dream House, singing "Burn Baby Burn" and cackling madly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27398) - you deserved it (8372)
On 10/02/2011 at 3:27am - kids - by TraumatizedMother (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I gave a man a cigarette. He spent the rest of the day so far following me around, telling me all about his medical history, and chasing after me when I got too far away. I couldn't get rid of him for hours. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16997) - you deserved it (6700)
On 10/01/2011 at 12:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I learned no matter how much your friends pressure you, you must never snort lines of curry powder. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6078) - you deserved it (43889)
On 10/01/2011 at 2:48am - health - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, as I was walking home from school with my guy friends, my dad pulled up by the sidewalk, offered me a handful of dollar bills and said, "Get in, baby." Only after we drove away and he started laughing did I realize I'll probably never hear the end of this at school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20953) - you deserved it (5505)
On 09/30/2011 at 10:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, my friends and I were having a conversation about which mythical creature would be the most unlikely to exist in the real world. They all collectively agreed that it would be a girl who is attracted to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27177) - you deserved it (3396)
On 09/28/2011 at 3:26pm - love - by Unluckiest Guy of the group (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I timed my walk to work perfectly so that I avoided getting sprayed by the rotating sprinklers along the street. As soon as I successfully passed the last sprinkler, a bus sped by me, hit a puddle, and covered me head to toe in muddy water. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25600) - you deserved it (2248)
On 09/28/2011 at 1:54pm - misc - by Daralea (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my mom instructed me to never scream when being attacked by a rapist. Apparently it would only anger him, causing him to chop my boobs off and superglue my eyes shut. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28877) - you deserved it (2345)
On 09/28/2011 at 2:47am - intimacy - by Sabraynay -
I agree, your life sucks (9372) - you deserved it (21413)
On 09/26/2011 at 10:51pm - health - by mimi - United States (Illinois)
Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32491) - you deserved it (2304)
On 09/26/2011 at 2:52pm - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I went out with a guy I really liked for the first time. He tried to hold my hands, only to be stopped by my mum, jumping out from nowhere saying "Oh no you don't!" before slapping him. This isn't the first time this has happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33066) - you deserved it (2318)
Today, my father was telling me that one of the benefits about his job was that the family could get discounts, then asked if I'd like some. My dad's a plastic surgeon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19516) - you deserved it (2068)
On 09/25/2011 at 12:17am - work - by ouch. (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, after five long years of having been together, my boyfriend told me that he wanted to take our relationship to the "next level". We now have a Sims relationship. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23051) - you deserved it (3340)
On 09/23/2011 at 6:24pm - love - by Anonymous - Germany (Berlin)
Today, desperate for my boyfriend to notice me for once, I started noisily masturbating while he was playing World of Warcraft. His response was to put his headphones on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31845) - you deserved it (9877)
On 09/23/2011 at 6:41am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Monday 20 May 2013
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