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NeCKX

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NeCKX

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1857
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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NeCKX's favorite FMLs

Today, on the bus, a little boy gave me the dirtiest look, pointed at my pregnant stomach, and menacingly said, "I know what you did." FML

#21205823
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50619) - you deserved it (6626)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:03am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had dinner for the first time with my boyfriend's parents. It was awkward enough without his mom asking, "So, what do you do for fun, besides my son?" FML

#21173084
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46383) - you deserved it (5580)

On 06/13/2014 at 5:27am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up screaming like a little bitch. I'd been having a bizarre dream where I was having sex with Homer Simpson, when he suddenly had a heart attack and fell on me, crushing me to death. I think my brain needs a douching. FML

#21171240
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46422) - you deserved it (6986)

On 06/11/2014 at 6:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was at a buffet with my kids and husband. As my boys got up to get more food, I told them they'd better come back with something green on their plate. They both came back with mint ice cream and got a high-five from my husband. FML

#21154562
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46414) - you deserved it (27781)

On 05/28/2014 at 12:28pm - kids - by outsmartedbykids (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my guide dog sneezed so hard that it slammed its head on the floor and knocked itself out. I have to trust this dog with my life. FML

#21117679
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51495) - you deserved it (4518)

On 04/20/2014 at 12:03am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Idaho)

Today, I told my husband to give our dog a bath while I was at work. When I returned home, I found my dog, along with my husband, in the bath together. FML

#21074688
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40325) - you deserved it (9336)

On 03/01/2014 at 3:23am - animals - by lacy - United States (Kentucky)

Today, after getting back from my interior design class, I told my husband that I learned the golden rule for home decor: "Have nothing in your houses that you do not know to be useful or believe to be beautiful." He looked at me dead in the eyes, and didn't say a word. FML

#21068258
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36136) - you deserved it (6273)

On 02/22/2014 at 6:01am - misc - by housedoctor (woman) - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, I was out with my girlfriend at a club. As a slow dance began, a guy approached and asked, "May I cut in?" My girlfriend surprised me by saying, "Sure!" As I was about to protest, the guy cut me off and said, "Sorry miss, I was asking him." FML

#21059471
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46373) - you deserved it (6551)

On 02/13/2014 at 8:31pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was getting ready for a night out with the girls, and without any hint of trickery, just wanting an honest answer, I asked my boyfriend how I looked in the dress I chose. He immediately dropped to his knees, yelled, "NOOOOOOOOO!" and calmly left the room. FML

#21024776
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37686) - you deserved it (8276)

On 01/11/2014 at 6:13pm - misc - by -_-" (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML

#21023934
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46289) - you deserved it (8711)

On 01/10/2014 at 9:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I joined my friends out birthday clubbing. After I'd gotten a little drunk, a few guys asked for my number. I rattled off random numbers, until I accidentally said my mother's. Guess who woke up to a text at 2:17 in the morning, containing a picture of a penis. FML

#21022033
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26947) - you deserved it (35110)

On 01/08/2014 at 7:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I found a great recipe for dinner, and emailed it to myself with the subject "Dinner tonight". Hours later, I'd forgotten all about it, opened my emails, saw the subject line, and thought someone was asking me out to dinner. I got really excited until I saw the sender address. FML

#21019190
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45285) - you deserved it (14152)

On 01/06/2014 at 3:57pm - misc - by Mels (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, like every other day for many years, I have a phobia of bananas. This evening, the phobia came to a head when I had a nightmare in which I was stabbed to death by a gang of walking bananas. FML

#21015899
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41585) - you deserved it (7870) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/03/2014 at 6:28pm - misc - by Elisa_LmR (woman) - France

Today, my French wife chose the name of our unborn baby girl. She wants to call her Fanny and won't change her mind. FML

#21015236
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42566) - you deserved it (4807)

On 01/03/2014 at 6:03am - kids - by noway (man) - France (Pays de la Loire)

Today, I watched my father attempt to light a cigar with the stove and end up burning off some hair and eyebrows. He tried to play it cool, said, "Haircuts are too expensive these days anyway." and walked out, his head smoking. This man is a college professor. FML



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