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YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (3334) - you deserved it (14317) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, a guy asked me out and said he was going to take me to a fancy restaurant where they make the food in front of you. I love Japanese food, so I was really excited. We went to Subway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8665) - you deserved it (1387)
On 04/11/2012 at 12:54pm - love - by mista_sandy (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my ex-husband officially became my step dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22448) - you deserved it (1053)
Today, I woke up super glued to the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6574) - you deserved it (2594)
On 04/06/2012 at 10:26pm - misc - by Tanner - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was making love to my boyfriend, when he said "I love you, baby." I told him to go deeper, but instead of doing so, he decided to completely kill the mood by stopping and saying it again in a Barry White type voice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5102) - you deserved it (2311)
On 04/01/2012 at 2:38pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States
Today, I visited my gynecologist. As she had her fingers inside me she decided that was the perfect time to say, "I absolutely love your socks!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (5724) - you deserved it (844)
On 03/31/2012 at 12:22am - health - by GetHardOrGoHome - United States (Ohio)
Today, I spent 3 hours trying to read my dog's mind. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3921) - you deserved it (20660)
On 03/28/2012 at 2:57am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I failed my driving test. I rammed into the parallel parking poles, ran a stop sign, and stopped at a cross intersection. My instructor called me an idiot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1455) - you deserved it (12285)
On 03/27/2012 at 10:38pm - misc - by Brittany (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I had a terrible nightmare involving zombies slashing and eating at my face. I woke up in terror and urine, and found the slashing was very real: it was my cat pawing my face for me to feed him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5793) - you deserved it (1035)
On 03/25/2012 at 1:21pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I was on the train ride home from a trip to Florida, and I gave my mom a call. While we talked, I made an offhand comment that all my friends back home must miss me. She knowingly asked if I meant my Sims and my cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5493) - you deserved it (1265)
On 03/20/2012 at 3:15pm - misc - by lyla - United States
Today, I had a conversation with another patient in my gyno's waiting room. It was about her getting pregnant in a truck while passed out drunk, her therapist's frequent use of a "For Dummies" books, and how she had waxed and oiled everything to impress our doctor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4702) - you deserved it (596)
On 03/19/2012 at 6:37am - misc - by PatientInWaiting (woman) - United States
Today, a little girl looked at me and yelled "Mommy look, there's a real leprechaun!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (7091) - you deserved it (624)
On 03/17/2012 at 8:48pm - kids - by Redhead4life (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, my fiancé came home drunk with some girl. Then he told her that I was his sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12984) - you deserved it (962)
On 03/16/2012 at 6:38am - love - by elisabeth_pwnes - Norway (Vestfold)
Today, I had just finished up at work. I was standing on a street corner, waiting to cross to get to my car on the other side. I had three people pull up beside me and ask me how much I charged. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16839) - you deserved it (6284)
On 03/15/2012 at 4:44pm - love - by W45T3D_Y0UTH (woman) - Canada
Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18863) - you deserved it (10359)
On 03/14/2012 at 3:51am - misc - by daddy-o - United States (Utah)
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