Naomiiiii

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Naomiiiii

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 22 September 1991 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1128
  • Number of comments : 28
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Naomiiiii : I'm awesome

Naomiiiii's page activity

Visits<b>LoneWolf2879</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 7:13pm<b>ninety</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 7:02pm<b>ratman775</b> - the 11/08/2015 at 3:18pm<b>nightwalker52</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 12:18am<b>SeraSea123</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 6:44pm<b>amc597</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 12:13pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 2:14am<b>adamrjprice</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 11:27am<b>idkwat2useasname</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 5:07pm<b>dizzybum</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 11:39am<b>swasher</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 3:01am<b>InfinityPlusOne</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 8:11am<b>kozzard</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 3:09am<b>LeroyJenkins27</b> - the 01/31/2014 at 5:50pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 11:59am<b>iamananglophile</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 12:34pm<b>holyfaqballs</b> - the 03/19/2013 at 8:29pm<b>IBJason456</b> - the 02/20/2013 at 5:54pm

Naomiiiii's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Naomiiiii's favorite FMLs

Today, I ran into a guy who I was completely in love with for months. After a couple of minutes, I realised he totally bores me senseless. What a waste of 4 months obsessing over that shithead. FML

by EmDa / 04/21/2011 at 10:44am / India / Love

Today, I went up to a girl at a bus stop and started chatting her up. Her response? "Am I being robbed?" FML

by Anonymous / 04/04/2011 at 2:15am / Mozambique (Maputo) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was out enjoying my daily jog, when out of nowhere, a group of kids in a passing car pelted me with ketchup-filled water balloons. FML

by Natalie / 04/01/2011 at 2:16pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I opened a cupboard and a brick fell on my head. The same brick my mum put up there to "keep it out of the way". FML

by EllieJ / 03/23/2011 at 11:22am / Health

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm / United Kingdom (Wiltshire) / Geek

Today, my mom banned me from watching The Simpsons and Family Guy because apparently, they're part of "the Devil's plan to corrupt God's children". FML

by Jonathan / 03/18/2011 at 5:40pm / Denmark (Midtjyllen) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. I started to moan right when I was about to climax. He got worried, stopped and asked, "Are you okay?!" FML

by thisblows / 03/16/2011 at 12:50pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend did the Austin Powers dance/strip-tease while dancing to 'I Touch Myself'. It was cute until he ripped off his shirt and revealed that he'd shaved his chest hair in the shape of a penis. FML

by Anon / 03/10/2011 at 10:08am / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML

by Anon. / 03/01/2011 at 6:51pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I was fired. My boss told me via email that it was because I "don't have enough experience with fun spiritual." Uh, what? FML

by Anonymous / 02/23/2011 at 5:36pm / United Kingdom (London) / Work

Today, I was eating a hotdog. My huge Siberian Husky, upon becoming aware of this, jumped up on me. He forced his tongue into my mouth and ate the food I was in the middle of eating. FML

by EpicUsername / 03/10/2010 at 8:14pm / United States (Illinois) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was going to have sex with my Hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say "fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was 'pollo frito'. I then had sex, constantly screaming 'pollo frito' for an hour. I later realized I was screaming "fried chicken." FML

by FML.. / 04/06/2009 at 3:51pm / China (Hebei) / Intimacy

Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 1:13am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy