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MzMegs

Offline (the 01/29/2016 at 3:08am) | Search for a member

MzMegs

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Phoenix, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 21 July 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6173
  • Number of comments : 147
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About MzMegs : I'm Meghan. Married 12.13.2015

MzMegs's page activity

Visits<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 11:36pm<b>ghostriley</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 8:10pm<b>kissychick</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 6:43pm<b>airassault</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 4:41pm<b>doge750</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 5:39pm<b>Zoldyck</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 11:40pm<b>BWARD51</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 6:34pm<b>ScarletSarah</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 2:04pm<b>Raelthelamb</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 4:57pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 1:32pm<b>xxprincesskayxx</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 10:32pm<b>ashieee143</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 7:32am<b>ChrisPavs</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 2:09am<b>iPixelCheese</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 3:46pm<b>pizzzzza</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 9:57pm<b>caaxo</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 2:53am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 9:21pm<b>nataliewby</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 9:32pm

Fucked!<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 7:44am

MzMegs's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of MzMegs's badges

MzMegs's favorite FMLs

Today, I heard that a boy in my class had written a song about me. Intrigued, I went to see him perform. I spent 3 excruciating minutes listening to a song about 'the girl of his dreams', his tear-filled eyes staring into mine the whole time. I have to sit next to this freak for the next 2 years. FML

#17488999
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16700) - you deserved it (53411)

On 08/16/2011 at 9:20am - love - by worried (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, my boyfriend and I tried to give his cat medicine. Unfortunately, it reacted in a way it never had before: clawed his arms to bits, bit him so hard a tooth fell out, peed everywhere, including on me, and pooped on the carpet. FML

#16574286
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33408) - you deserved it (5768)

On 06/09/2011 at 3:20am - animals - by CatLady (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I signed up for an online dating site. In order to prove I was human and complete my registration, I had to pass a CAPTCHA. Coincidentally enough, the words in it were "depressed" and "loser". FML

#16515986
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33298) - you deserved it (7418)

On 06/05/2011 at 4:31pm - love - by Jakub89 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my toilet decided it wouldn't take any more shit from me, and flooded the bathroom. FML

#16299538
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39951) - you deserved it (6336)

On 05/22/2011 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up to a mosquito feeding on my morning wood; probably the only thing that will ever suck my penis. FML

#16277810
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63739) - you deserved it (11069)

On 05/21/2011 at 5:07am - intimacy - by no one - United States (Alaska)

Today, I woke up face-down in my grandfather's driveway, soaking wet with no pants, glitter in my hair, and holding an empty Skippy peanut butter jar. No one will tell me what happened. FML

#16258570
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36606) - you deserved it (21992)

On 05/19/2011 at 9:38pm - misc - by Devon (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I was brushing my teeth. As a bent down to spit my mouthful of toothpaste into the sink, my cat decided it would be a good time to stick his head right where I was spitting. I spit a huge glob of toothpaste on his head. He then shook it off all over me and the walls. FML

#16157104
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27972) - you deserved it (8212)

On 05/13/2011 at 11:41am - animals - by toothpastecat (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my fire alarm startled me so badly that I shit myself. FML

#16081373
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40304) - you deserved it (12623)

On 05/07/2011 at 6:27pm - misc - by Mel (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, after being annoyed one too many times by my students' whiney attitudes, I accidentally blurted out, "Quit being such a bitch," to the superintendent's daughter. FML

#16017887
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23999) - you deserved it (44481)

On 05/02/2011 at 10:30am - work - by MathTeacher (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, while buying groceries, I noticed that the lady in front of me had left a box behind. I grabbed the box and ran out the door after her. After turning around to find three employees chasing me, I noticed I had just stolen the donation box. FML

#15929536
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32835) - you deserved it (16721)

On 04/26/2011 at 12:45am - misc - by magicman - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out the hard way that I'm the "lucky" type of woman who can experience intense orgasms in certain positions: in the middle of group yoga. FML

#15896670
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46907) - you deserved it (7317)

On 04/23/2011 at 10:55am - intimacy - by nightDREAMERms (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I watched my dog chase his tail for ten minutes, thinking "wow, dogs are easily entertained." Then I realized that I'd been watching my dog chase his tail for 10 minutes. FML

#15762337
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19719) - you deserved it (39563)

On 04/12/2011 at 10:20pm - animals - by Anonymous -

Today, I went to a baseball game. It was windy, so I decided to get my hat from the car trunk. When I opened it and reached in, loose papers started flying everywhere. Panicked, my dad slammed the trunk shut on my fingers. Entering the stadium, I discovered it was free hat day. FML

#15647807
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34262) - you deserved it (5514)

On 04/05/2011 at 3:46am - health - by oww (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML

#15583575
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27517) - you deserved it (34913)

On 04/01/2011 at 12:32am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was sitting beside a very cute girl on a 3 hour bus trip with my class. She fell asleep, head on my lap. She woke up because my erection was jabbing her in the cheek. FML

#15532710
485 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58772) - you deserved it (29181)

On 03/28/2011 at 4:13pm - intimacy - by dickface - Canada (Ontario)



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