About MyLifeIsDerp : Im that Token black guy who is good at.. pretty much everything. Gaming is a big one.
MyLifeIsDerp's FML badges
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
MyLifeIsDerp's favorite FMLs
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I was getting pretty horny, and I thought some dirty talk would turn him on. Amid my panting, I breathed the words, "Fuck me." He then stopped and said, "Excuse me, I don't like hearing that language." and wouldn't continue until I corrected myself. FML
by Anonymous / 12/24/2012 at 8:32am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
by heya / 12/24/2012 at 5:09am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
Today, my mother has stooped to a new level of "hiding" Christmas gifts. She now just dumps them in the middle of the floor and says, "Don't look at them." If she even thinks I'm glancing in the direction of the pile, she will burst into a manic rage, and yell at me for "ruining the surprise." FML
by Mandy93 / 12/20/2012 at 8:57am / Germany (Rheinland-Pfalz) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated, and he started to go down on me. In excitement, I accidentally drove a knee into his face. No amount of fondling his diddlestick made him forgive me for his bloody nose and swollen eye. FML
by Anonymous / 03/16/2012 at 4:23pm / Ireland / Intimacy
- « Previous page
- Next page »
- Today, my boyfriend of 4 years told me he's unhappy with his life. He's basically with me because I… Today, I met the man of my dreams. Hot, funny, smart, sensitive, he guesses at what I need before I… Today, at 16, I had my first swimming lesson. I have to do it for physiotherapy and really didn't…