About MurphyS94 : Name's Jessica.
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MurphyS94's favorite FMLs
by quickfingers100 / 05/22/2011 at 5:31am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 01/15/2011 at 9:38am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had a blind date. When I arrived at our meeting place, I spotted my date, because he was the only one in the bar wearing a nametag. I walked up to him and asked, "Are you John?" He responded, "That depends. Are you Jen?" When I said yes he said, "Then no," and left. FML
by lifesux / 12/31/2009 at 12:33pm / United States (New York) / Love
Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML
by offbeans / 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm / United States (California) / Kids
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- Today, I was called by my one night stand. She informed me she was pregnant with my child, i asked… Today, like every other day, I woke up and made myself a cup of coffee using my French press. After… Today, a customer threw a cup of cole slaw at my face at the restaurant I work at for "not serving…