Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Ms_ValS

Online | Search for a member

Ms_ValS

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 23 July 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4726
  • Number of comments : 160
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Ms_ValS's page activity

Visits<b>cmac86</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 10:11am<b>CaptainRR</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 4:29am<b>martin8337</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 12:03am<b>_batwoman_</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 11:53pm<b>Steve95401</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 11:51pm<b>orneryvixen</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 2:01pm<b>WaltzingPhanthom</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 9:49am<b>bigmike3000</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 2:19am<b>tanishpradhan</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 12:12am<b>Dgarcia2014</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 11:48pm<b>gabechriswill</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 3:23pm<b>Apretendbiscuit</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 3:35am<b>sexymomo1234</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 1:35am<b>Ghilliebro</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 1:30am<b>artistswife</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 1:09am<b>steeler088</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 10:46pm<b>FutBol_Fan_30</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 3:58pm<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 3:56pm

Fucked!<b>martin8337</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 6:03am<b>WaltzingPhanthom</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 3:49pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 2:45pm<b>Shmatterhorn</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 8:07am

Ms_ValS's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

42

You see, sonny boy, moderating FMLs is a bit like running a marathon.

See all of Ms_ValS's badges

Ms_ValS's favorite FMLs

Today, during a series of violent sneezes due to a cold, I bit my tongue. My tongue is now so swollen I cannot close my mouth and am drooling profusely. I have to get ready to go to my job as a cashier. FML

#20704938
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43094) - you deserved it (3568)

On 06/04/2013 at 2:47am - health - by samaram (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend of two years, whom I supported through the death of his father, and whose invalid mother I also took care of, suddenly dumped me. The fact that I've put on a little weight due to recent stress disgusts him, and he "can't date a chubster". FML

Today, my mother and I got into an argument, and she told me to go to my room. I refused, prompting her to slap the shit out of me. I'm 29, and she was visiting me at my own house. FML

#20654425
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59047) - you deserved it (6024)

On 05/10/2013 at 3:28pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I decided to end things with my boyfriend, thinking it would be fine since things have never been at all serious between us. He cried for hours before having his grandmother text me to say how heartless I am. FML

#20654207
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43464) - you deserved it (8052)

On 05/10/2013 at 12:48pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway

Today, I finally started exercising. I'm a rather obese person and I'm super pumped up to finally get off my lazy butt and lose some weight. Locking myself in my room, I first started with a very simple exercise: jumping jacks. I farted each time I jumped. I jumped 10 times. FML

#20640437
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46225) - you deserved it (11381)

On 05/04/2013 at 4:11am - health - by thatonesilentkidinclass (man) - Philippines (Batangas)

Today, my school took part in a standardized state test. After finishing, I decided to take a nap, only to be awoken by the test monitor, who wanted me to leave. Apparently, I was ferociously farting in my sleep and was disturbing the people still taking the test. FML

#20618481
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56999) - you deserved it (12767)

On 04/24/2013 at 3:14pm - misc - by Skyler - United States

Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML

#20612550
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32836) - you deserved it (112814)

On 04/22/2013 at 3:19am - misc - by Anon - Singapore

Today, I had phone sex with my boyfriend. He had an asthma attack. FML

#20592968
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59944) - you deserved it (10849)

On 04/15/2013 at 5:09am - intimacy - by JRLJLS (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML

#20582197
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47536) - you deserved it (4891)

On 04/09/2013 at 2:01pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to visit some family out of state for my niece's birthday. I couldn't think of what to get an 8-year-old so I got her a Barbie doll. Everyone else got her money, iPods, game consoles, etc. When she got to mine she asked "how do I turn it on?" Then threw it away when she couldn't. FML

#20568124
318 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47151) - you deserved it (4859)

On 03/31/2013 at 9:32am - kids - by The_Black_Jesus - United States

Today, my 19-year-old son told me his girlfriend is pregnant, and was diagnosed with an STD. He's sure that he's the father. He's also sure he doesn't have an STD, because he's a virgin. I had to give him the sex talk that his school never did, as well as explain to him that his girlfriend is a cheater. FML

#20565460
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44680) - you deserved it (15147)

On 03/29/2013 at 1:18pm - misc - by fucked by sex ed (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my superstitious girlfriend of 4 years sneezed in the middle of my proposal. She claimed it was a sign from the universe for us to break up and then immediately left. FML

#20550300
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44797) - you deserved it (3388)

On 03/19/2013 at 12:40am - love - by lanz4949 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while on a crowded public bus, a cute girl asked if she could sit next to me. Problem is, I didn't hear correctly and thought she asked if anyone was sitting next to me. I answered no, causing her to walk off angrily and earning me several disgusted stares from other passengers. FML

#20530703
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33348) - you deserved it (7058)

On 03/04/2013 at 9:23am - misc - by Anonymous - Taiwan (T'ai-pei)

Today, while mopping floors at the police station, an inmate pissed on the floor, demanded that I suck his dick, begged me for a glass of water and finally informed me that he would kill my family. I said nothing and he started weeping softly. I laughed, but slipped in his piss and broke my arm. FML

#20529783
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37888) - you deserved it (12696)

On 03/03/2013 at 5:21pm - work - by JimmyT (man) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, after a long work shift, I was so tired that I took a nap in my car to avoid driving half-asleep. When I awoke, there was a huge truck in front of me. I thought I'd fallen asleep while driving and was about to die. I only realized it was stationary after I pissed myself. FML

#20529430
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33591) - you deserved it (5638)

On 03/03/2013 at 12:37pm - misc - by FUCKKKS (man) - United States



FML's blog

  • FML's Question Time #2: School
  • We tried this before and it went pretty well, so here's another blog section for everyone to have give their opinion on a popular but controversial subject. OK, we're not debating a…

Thursday 23 April 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: