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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 864
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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MrVanAwesome's page activity

Visits<b>TelephoneChoir</b> - the 10/08/2016 at 8:19am<b>BonerFart</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 3:55pm<b>mikey12212</b> - the 03/22/2016 at 2:44am<b>UnidentifiedFun</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 7:13am<b>Blesst</b> - the 11/12/2015 at 7:06pm<b>MissMayLaw001</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 11:22am<b>saucybugger101</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 4:43pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 8:17am<b>besosforme</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 4:25am<b>Nubbington1402</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 7:22pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 6:42am<b>badbitch23</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 7:57pm<b>CreepinCow</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 12:15pm<b>PrinceOfBritain</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 11:20pm<b>JustForRetorts</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 11:14pm<b>RockyRacoon</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 11:33am<b>XmasaX</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 10:43pm<b>MissyPastaCreeps</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 8:34pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 2:17pm<b>derp_taco</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 5:33am

MrVanAwesome's FML badges


You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

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MrVanAwesome's favorite FMLs

Today, a parent was too busy texting to notice her child had run in front of a moving truck. She did however see me grab the child's backpack to yank him back out of traffic. She then screamed at me for "manhandling" her child and demanded I be fired. It's not even my school; I'm a part time sub. FML

by bad samaritan / 10/22/2012 at 11:51pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I saw my music teacher, who I considered one of my role-models, on TV. Too bad it was because she'd robbed a church. FML

by musicthief / 10/22/2012 at 6:51pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, as my girlfriend and I were making out, I slowly took my clothes off and revealed my body to her for the first time. She looked, smiled, and said reassuringly, "Aww, don't worry. I know how it's supposed to look." FML

by whatswrongwithit?:( / 09/30/2012 at 3:37pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, my dad told me I'm no longer allowed to see my boyfriend. Apparently there is a deer camera above my driveway that snaps pictures whenever it senses movement. Too bad I didn't know that when I was giving my boyfriend head in the driveway. FML

by Username / 08/31/2011 at 3:36am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my sister presented me with an "official pet killer" award after yet another goldfish under my care died of unknown causes. FML

by fish killer / 03/25/2011 at 5:52pm / United States (Illinois) / Animals

Today, at work, a coworker started to tell me about his weekend, without me even asking. Halfway through his story, I started to daydream and lost track of time. Bored, I told him, "Hey man, I'll call you back, I've got to get back to work." Then I remembered I wasn't on the phone. FML

by PFCdavila / 03/22/2011 at 11:46pm / United States (North Carolina) / Work

Today, my six year old told me I have a big nose. When I told her that she hurt my feelings, she laughed and said "Don't be silly mummy, ugly people don't have feelings." FML

by uglywoman / 12/14/2010 at 3:21am / Australia (Queensland) / Kids

Today, I fell asleep and dreamed that I had won $500,000. In my dream, I used this money to buy a new MP3 Player, and then put the rest in a term deposit. Even in my dreams, I'm the most boring person I know. FML

by boring / 05/10/2010 at 6:14am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Money

Today, I ran out of my usual hand lotion that I use for 'me time'. I instead decided to try and us my after shave lotion as a replacement. Apparently, my member doesn't agree with one of the ingredients, and has now swollen to the size of my fist. FML

by Metime / 11/04/2009 at 11:17pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Intimacy

Today, I got written up at work for making a customer feel bad. I made him feel bad by laughing uncontrollably at him when he asked if we sold real light sabers. FML

by Timmah / 08/31/2009 at 1:18am / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, my sister came over for a visit. I was going to surprise her with the news that I had spontaneously gotten a cat. The first thing she told me when she came in was that she ran over my neighbor's cat. None of my neighbors have cats. FML

by catlady5569 / 08/27/2009 at 4:13am / United States (Washington) / Animals

Today, I was going on a first date with a girl I really like. We were going to see the new Harry Potter movie, and she told me she was getting all dressed up. It was only after I picked her up I realized she meant that she was dressing nicely. I was dressed as Harry Potter. FML

by harrysolo / 07/18/2009 at 9:26pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous