About Mooish : I am young, part cyclops and part mermaid.
I speak English, Spanish, some German, and mostly fish.
When I am supposed to be doing stuff I am probably on FML.
Thanks for stalken!
- Mooish.
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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I accidentally decoded the system my parents use for talking about sex while I'm around. It's a substituion cipher, using literary references. As they're both lit. professors, this has me perpetually grossed-out and wondering, "Are they really talking about Anne Frank, or anal fisting?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (18813) - you deserved it (1653)
On 08/26/2012 at 5:21am - misc - by ewww (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I found myself trying to explain to my puppy why I'm still single. I think I just found out why. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13206) - you deserved it (3972)
On 08/18/2012 at 7:02pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my family and I went to the movie theater. There weren't enough free seats near the front, so I sat a few rows back with my grandpa. He kept throwing our snacks at my parents' heads all through the movie. He claimed he'd been asleep the whole time, and I'm now grounded. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19588) - you deserved it (1621)
On 08/17/2012 at 8:39pm - misc - by wow, thanks (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. He now argues that he should keep the dog. We only dated for three months, and I've had the dog since I was ten. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26844) - you deserved it (1359)
On 08/14/2012 at 5:06am - love - by cclllc (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, yet again, I had to dye my hair brown in advance of the new school year, because my school doesn't allow "unapproved" colors, even if they're natural. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22243) - you deserved it (1327)
On 08/13/2012 at 1:50pm - misc - by youmothERFUCKErs (woman) - United States
Today, out of habit, after scratching my balls, I then smelt my hand. It was at that moment I realized most of my gym was staring at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4326) - you deserved it (30645)
On 08/08/2012 at 10:00am - misc - by FutureMarine3658 - United States (Utah)
Today, my soon-to-be stepson, 13, decided that he and I needed to spend "more quality time" together. His idea? We should start "bonding" by taking a bath together. When I said no, he told me I was being unfair, and that if I really loved him, I'd do it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22535) - you deserved it (1546)
On 08/03/2012 at 4:21am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend opened my refrigerator and began her standard moan: "You're a pig, you never clean up. Look at that egg, it makes me want to throw up, it's gone black, it’s covered in fuzz, IT'S GOT HAIR ON IT!" I got up to check it out. It was a Kiwi fruit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29686) - you deserved it (2916) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 08/02/2012 at 9:00am - love - by opinaise - France (Midi-Pyrenees)
Today, my son got to my great grandfather's old stopwatch, which had been valued at a very high sum, and broke it by twisting the hands in reverse. He says he was trying to time travel. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14950) - you deserved it (2078)
On 07/29/2012 at 2:49pm - kids - by oink oink fuck off - United Kingdom (Doncaster)
Today, I used a man's shirt as a pillowcase and sprayed it with cologne so I wouldn't feel alone in the night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17042) - you deserved it (6450)
On 07/18/2012 at 10:21am - love - by MaeMoss (woman) - United States
Today, I shaved my legs for the first time in three weeks. It took half an hour, three disposable razors, and I cut my legs up so badly they look worse then they did when they were hairy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6664) - you deserved it (20139)
On 07/15/2012 at 10:42am - misc - by Taylor - United States (New York)
Today, I was so out of it from a lack of sleep and an accidental antihistamine overdose, I tried to offer my cat a cup of tea, and actually got pissed off when he didn't reply. It took me a good five minutes to understand what just happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16569) - you deserved it (4291)
On 06/20/2012 at 10:09am - animals - by anonymous - United Kingdom
Today, my grandmother threatened to kill herself with a banana. She then got angry with me when I didn't attempt to get the banana away from her. My mom punished me because I didn't take the situation seriously enough. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23145) - you deserved it (2058)
On 06/18/2012 at 7:38am - misc - by DwarfFrog - United States
Today, I learned that shaving while feeling upset is a very bad idea. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11743) - you deserved it (3945)
On 05/22/2012 at 6:35am - health - by Anonymous - Philippines
Today, it was my birthday. I was heading back to my apartment and I heard noises inside the door. Assuming it was the surprise party I'd hinted at, I flicked on the lights as two heavy guys pushed past me. I was robbed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23238) - you deserved it (1216)
On 05/10/2012 at 8:28pm - money - by Anonymous - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
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