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Monster27

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Monster27

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5513
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Monster27's page activity

Visits<b>ughlifesuck</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 10:14am<b>styles829</b> - the 10/04/2015 at 1:04pm<b>Chinhull</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 9:13am<b>mds9986</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 12:45pm<b>photographer49</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 5:15pm<b>rareawesomeness</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 12:24am<b>BeastlyNoob9696</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 8:43pm<b>jsjelly07</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 11:23pm<b>melbear772</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 9:37pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 5:35pm<b>SaharaZinc</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 11:15pm<b>killjoys_forever</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 11:33am<b>beamdaddy48</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 3:26pm<b>WillowB47</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 1:28am<b>elgallero</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 11:45pm<b>PerSueTwo513</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 2:44pm<b>AlwaysWatching</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 9:54pm<b>TheKingKen</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 11:20am

Fucked!<b>mds9986</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 6:46pm

Monster27's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

See all of Monster27's badges

Monster27's favorite FMLs

Today, I was out with my brother and his group of very cute friends at a Cheesecake Factory. When the server came to take our orders, she asked me what kind of sauce I liked. Like a complete fuckwit, I blurted, "I like creamy white stuff." The guy across from me choked on his water. FML

Today, my dad sat me and my sister down and give us a "talk". More like an angry irrational rant. He forbade us from being gay, marrying a Muslim or a black person, demanded kids from both of us, and threatened to disown us if we didn't. Where's my free will? FML

#21511511
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22363) - you deserved it (2012)

On 01/04/2016 at 7:21pm - misc - by this is impossible (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my friend took me tandem skydiving. When it was time to jump, he began crying, said he'd cut our parachute cords, then said "Goodbye, cruel world!" and pushed me off the plane with him strapped to my back. I pissed myself and cried like a bitch. He thinks his "prank" was hilarious. FML

#21500058
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26207) - you deserved it (2683)

On 12/04/2015 at 3:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend told me that he doesn't know why I think deepthroating is so uncomfortable. To prove his point, he grabbed my dildo and effortlessly slid it down his throat. FML

#21479432
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31620) - you deserved it (5615)

On 10/13/2015 at 3:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my clinical instructor told me to stop being so negative, to get over myself, and to focus on nursing school. I'm only distracted because 3 days ago I was told I might have colon cancer. FML

#21476796
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24333) - you deserved it (1358)

On 10/06/2015 at 11:29am - health - by edavis1993 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I walked into my room and watched as my fanatically religious mother sniffed the used tissues in my trash bin to make sure I wasn't masturbating. FML

#21472718
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31547) - you deserved it (2006)

On 09/25/2015 at 9:10pm - intimacy - by Thank God I Flush Them Down The Toilet (man) - United States (California)

Today, I screamed like a little girl and scrambled to climb atop the toilet seat when I saw a cockroach running around our bathroom. My 5-year-old nephew came in, slapped it to death and said not to be scared, because he'll always protect me. FML

#21458825
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25422) - you deserved it (6718)

On 08/21/2015 at 11:25am - kids - by MyBallsForSaleOnEbay (man) - Malta

Today, I found out the girl I met online, who I spent hours talking to every day for the past 2 months, and who I fell in love with is actually my gay roomate. He says if I could fall in love with "her", I can fall in love with him. It doesn't work that way, dickhead. FML

#21457909
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28615) - you deserved it (4397)

On 08/19/2015 at 2:32am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I let out a huge fart during a job interview. I was the one conducting the interview. FML

#21455368
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20966) - you deserved it (4903)

On 08/12/2015 at 9:18pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, my parents sent me to the hospital because they thought I had diabetes. One of the symptoms is that you a pee a lot. The only reason I go to the bathroom so often is so I can masturbate. FML

#21449844
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18613) - you deserved it (28003)

On 07/31/2015 at 1:38am - intimacy - by doodoobref - United States (Arizona)

Today, my mom told me that she heard me and my best friend in my room grunting and talking about how hard we were. She said she loved me and accepted me no matter what. Thanks mom, but we were working out. FML

#21445547
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25715) - you deserved it (5376)

On 07/22/2015 at 4:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I brought my best friend home and told my dad we were going to study together. He loudly replied "Woah!", stumbled around for a few seconds like he was drunk, then apologized and said the "sheer amount of gayness" between us had overloaded his gaydar. We're not gay, dammit! FML

#21429349
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26943) - you deserved it (3377)

On 06/21/2015 at 2:04am - misc - by notgay (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first ever blowjob and she surprised me by deciding to swallow. Or so I thought. When she came up to kiss me, she spat my man-milk into my mouth and almost pissed herself laughing when I freaked out and nearly threw up. FML

#21428553
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33482) - you deserved it (13986)

On 06/19/2015 at 12:17pm - intimacy - by shmarf (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was sick, and my voice was really low and raspy. A cute guy smiled at me and said hi, so I said hi too. He looked shocked and said, "Sorry bro, thought you were a girl." I am. FML

#21421148
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29676) - you deserved it (2136)

On 06/05/2015 at 8:21am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, I saw a real, erect penis for the first time. My brother's, while he was jerking off. He doesn't know I saw, because he was holding a pair of panties over his face with his other hand. I'm trying like hell to act like I'm not mentally scarred. FML

#21411971
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35507) - you deserved it (3712)

On 05/18/2015 at 12:58pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia



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