Monjara

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Monjara

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2675
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Monjara's page activity

Visits<b>refticon</b> - the 04/03/2016 at 5:42pm<b>constipation</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 8:46pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 6:19pm<b>hippodankamus</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 1:16am<b>Allornone</b> - the 05/14/2013 at 11:24pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 12:19am

Monjara's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of Monjara's badges

Monjara's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML

by Jon / 01/18/2010 at 3:26pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my mom and dad. It wasn't my dad. FML

by Anonymous / 12/27/2009 at 7:49am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, I had to look at my positive ebay feedback to feel loved. FML

by Anon. / 11/28/2009 at 7:22am / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Love

Today, I found out that the plant in my kitchen that I have been watering for almost 2 years is fake. FML

by IlikeGreenPlants / 11/25/2009 at 9:41pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to pretend to give birth in a play. I wanted to make it a realistic as possible but ended up crapping myself on stage by accident. FML

by oxjessiiox / 10/11/2009 at 11:42am / United Kingdom (Leicestershire) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at a local club with my friends sitting at a table when some guys approached us. One of them started telling me about his recent adventures through Europe and was very interesting. Something warm hit my leg and I realized the guy was urinating on me. FML

by Anonymous / 10/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend told me she lost her phone and not to call or text her. After about three hours, I text her phone, asking if she found it yet. I got a reply, saying "Nope." FML

by dumbass / 10/01/2009 at 4:07pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to cover for my coworker who didn't turn up for work. He is always late for work and I was pissed off about having to cover for him again so I said to my colleagues "He better be either in hospital or dead." Turns out he was dead. FML

by mcdeez / 09/21/2009 at 10:06pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Work

Today, I parked in front of a grocery store and took the portable GPS system off the mount on the dashboard and put it in my pocket so no one would break into my car and steal it. When I got back, the window was smashed and someone had stolen the plastic mount. FML

by sucksforme / 09/11/2009 at 8:40pm / United States (Oregon) / Transportation

Today, my husband and I decided to take a romantic trip to the beach. We got pulled over, and shortly thereafter he was arrested. Just so happens you can't miss child support payments for your twelve year old daughter without getting a warrant. He has a daughter? We've been married for 14 years. FML

by AreYouSerious / 08/26/2009 at 8:57pm / United States (Oregon) / Holidays

Today, I realised that my glade plug-in air freshner lasts longer than any of my relationships have. FML

by heartless / 05/15/2009 at 2:14am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I was pulling my trolley luggage at the airport when I passed 2 cute girls smiling at me. Thinking I looked real cool, I kept on walking without paying heed to anything else. Then my brother shouted asking me what was I doing, only to realise that the handle had come off a few metres back. FML

by NotSoCool / 05/15/2009 at 12:41am / Singapore / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking in the kitchen with my parrot on my shoulder and my dog running around. Something freaked out my bird and she bit my ear and started flapping her wings in my face. Surprised, I took a step back, tripped over my dog, fell, hit my head on the stove, and got knocked unconscious. FML

by margretlle / 04/26/2009 at 12:07am / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, I was eating a hamburger on the street when a pigeon came down to take a bite. I ran and got 30 birds or so chasing me. My legs were burning, half of my burger was gone, and an entire office building was laughing at me. FML

by fencernick / 04/22/2009 at 6:40am / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code tattoo 3 weeks ago and thought it would be funny to scan it. I'm a $5.98 160z claw hammer. FML

by tool / 04/09/2009 at 2:03am / United States (Nevada) / Work