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MollytheKillah

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MollytheKillah

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  • Number of visits : 432
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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MollytheKillah's page activity

Visits<b>JokerJim2013</b> - the 02/25/2013 at 11:27am

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MollytheKillah's favorite FMLs

Today, while a very cute girl was explaining the apartment's laundry machines to me, I blurted out, "It's okay, my pants are used to handling huge loads". FML

#16758524
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14724) - you deserved it (35333)

On 06/20/2011 at 3:37am - misc - by NewTenant (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while hiking, my dad decided we should take the beeline trail down the mountain to save time. We got to the bottom of the mountain when we discovered it was the wrong side of the mountain. We had to hike 13 extra miles around it to get back to our car. FML

#15956367
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26337) - you deserved it (5568)

On 04/27/2011 at 10:43pm - misc - by lostinthewoods (woman) - United States

Today, while making my son lunch, he pooped, took off his diaper, stepped in it, and then climbed to the gate to call for me. When I arrived, he had a big smile on his face and exclaimed, "Look!" Shit footprints were everywhere. FML

Today, while waiting in line for the ski lift, the lady behind me kept stepping on my skis. Annoyed, I turned around and shouted at her "Get the f*ck off my skis!" Just as the last word escaped my mouth, I noticed that my skis were crossed and it was actually me stepping on them. FML

#15127985
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6397) - you deserved it (56391)

On 02/26/2011 at 4:36pm - misc - by bitchyskier - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, it was opening night for the play where I was, for the first time ever, one of the leads. I went on stage with a loud and energetic entrance. I came in two scenes early. FML

#14468099
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10725) - you deserved it (28542)

On 01/04/2011 at 10:15pm - misc - by theatreluver (woman) - United States

Today, I took a nap because I've been sick for the past week and I was exhausted. When I woke up, my hair, shirt, pillow, and bedsheets were soaked. I threw up all over myself in my sleep. FML

#14095720
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30079) - you deserved it (2813)

On 12/05/2010 at 1:25pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Singapore

Today, while cuddling with my boyfriend in the dark, he grabbed onto a fat roll and asked, "Is this your stomach or boob?" I didn't have the heart to tell him it was a back roll. FML

#13741680
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20518) - you deserved it (23031)

On 11/06/2010 at 6:37pm - misc - by anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, there were reports of a drunk and disorderly male, and I arrived at the scene only to discover a drunk guy having explosive diarrhoea in a photo booth. He turned to me and shouted "God save the Queen!" It's then that I remembered it was my job to do something about it. FML

#13444115
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29014) - you deserved it (3022)

On 10/14/2010 at 9:42am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Reserved

Today, I had a wet dream about having sexual relations with a rubber duck. FML

#13373695
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29772) - you deserved it (8938)

On 10/09/2010 at 1:15am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, after going on a blind date with a man I had met on facebook, we decided to go back to his apartment. All was going good until he took off his pants, only to reveal that he was wearing a diaper. FML

#12929120
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38247) - you deserved it (18425)

On 09/06/2010 at 3:37am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, while casually sitting at a bar, a drunk biker with no teeth leaned over and tried to kiss me. I'm a sailor in the Navy, but I think I screamed like a little girl. FML

#12617808
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30489) - you deserved it (4783)

On 08/19/2010 at 1:16am - misc - by dentallycorrect - United States (Illinois)

Today, upon getting out of the shower, I discovered the towel I grabbed off the rack had dried poop on it. Apparently, during my sister's birthday party yesterday, we'd run out of toilet paper. FML

#12288946
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32028) - you deserved it (3631)

On 08/03/2010 at 2:13pm - misc - by missalexa - United States (California)

Today, I saw boobs, in person, for the first time. Too bad they were my mom's and I'm 27. FML

#8664737
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31158) - you deserved it (7465)

On 02/26/2010 at 2:17pm - intimacy - by sad (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I realized explosive diarrhea can happen, and at the most inopportune times, such as on the day of MY wedding. At the alter while my husband said his vows. FML

#8658648
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53519) - you deserved it (2774)

On 02/26/2010 at 5:23am - love - by pain (woman) - Japan

Today, I was checking out a gorgeous woman in spandex with beautiful flowing long black hair on the treadmill at the gym. I spent a few minutes just watching her body move and ripple under the material. She turned off the treadmill and got off, only for me to find out that it was a guy. FML

#8512491
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10333) - you deserved it (39231)

On 02/21/2010 at 10:16am - love - by anonymous - United States



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