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MollytheKillah

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MollytheKillah
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  • Number of visits : 341
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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MollytheKillah's favorite FMLs

Today, my 14-year-old step-daughter announced that she is 4 months pregnant. The father is my 15-year-old son. FML

#20111886
525 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71935) - you deserved it (8398)

On 10/11/2012 at 10:30am - kids - by wdunn69733 - United States (Georgia)

Today, at work, my buddy pulled up in his car. I handed him $40, and he handed me a bag. It must have looked like a drug deal, but he was actually just smuggling in the new Pokémon game for me. I'm 22, and a drug deal would probably have been less embarrassing to explain. FML

#20109009
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15051) - you deserved it (6495)

On 10/09/2012 at 12:03pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I have so much ass-acne that it hurts to sit. FML

#20101066
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21713) - you deserved it (4097)

On 10/04/2012 at 5:33am - health - by Chamorru (man) - United States

Today, I had to finally come to terms with the fact that I am obese when the doctor told me that my weird smell was not an infection but mold growing between my fat rolls. FML

#20089382
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7141) - you deserved it (27927)

On 09/26/2012 at 10:23am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, as a pizza delivery guy, I was forced to see yet another naked 200 pound teenage girl with a serious case of body acne. They're starting to give me nightmares. FML

#20081849
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22891) - you deserved it (2691)

On 09/21/2012 at 6:57am - work - by scarred for life - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had an ovarian cyst rupture at work, causing sudden severe stomach cramps; this caused my bowels to release everything right then and there, while on the phone with a customer, in the middle of the call center surrounded by 200 other sales reps. FML

#19991299
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26294) - you deserved it (1232)

On 07/29/2012 at 7:34pm - health - by sy123 (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, everyone found out about the strange but intense fetish I have for women physically lifting me. It all came out when my friend, a female bodybuilder, decided to grab and pick me up for a laugh. I came in my pants, in front of about twenty people. FML

#19983416
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35705) - you deserved it (7804)

On 07/25/2012 at 12:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I had a few friends over. Wanting to seem cool, I yelled at my girlfriend to get me a beer. She chucked four bottles at my head. All my friends cheered her on. FML

#19957248
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4612) - you deserved it (52895)

On 07/19/2012 at 12:55am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I sat awkwardly and pretended like I didn't notice my cousin discreetly trying to masturbate while talking to me. This isn't the first time anything like this has happened. FML

#19956706
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28017) - you deserved it (2835)

On 07/18/2012 at 10:15pm - intimacy - by Awkward - United States (California)

Today, a homeless man started to wet himself in the recliner at the coffee shop where I work. He then walked all the way to the bathroom, only to finish urinating in a puddle right in front of the bathroom door. Guess who cleaned it up. FML

#19907093
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20219) - you deserved it (1291)

On 07/07/2012 at 11:16pm - work - by cj1012 - United States

Today, I found out from her teacher that my daughter in kindergarten gets the little boys in her class to play grown-ups with her. It's basically dry humping and groaning. FML

#19822134
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27837) - you deserved it (8181)

On 06/21/2012 at 1:40am - kids - by Bad Mommy - United States (California)

Today, I was at a wedding. After videotaping the ceremony for a few minutes, my memory was full. I went to delete another video. I accidentally played the loudest video I had. No one was looking at the bride or groom anymore. FML

#19722666
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14755) - you deserved it (7468)

On 06/02/2012 at 7:28pm - misc - by dream1334 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

#19463606
582 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11629) - you deserved it (51473) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France

Today, my husband thought it would be funny to scare me by maniacally zooming in and out of traffic while we were on his motorcycle. His mood turned to anger when I nervously admitted to having voided my bowels. FML

#19350917
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17636) - you deserved it (2692)

On 03/26/2012 at 12:15pm - misc - by Shantwozzlah (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that the money my husband and I gave to my son for university courses, has instead been spent on pole dancing lessons. FML

#19160986
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20227) - you deserved it (2397)

On 02/25/2012 at 1:40pm - kids - by jj159 (woman) - United States



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