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Moemoemoe

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Moemoemoe
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 53502
  • Number of comments : 1132
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Moemoemoe's favorite FMLs

Today, I was wrapping Christmas presents for my family. I got a huge paper cut on the webbing of my fingers, the pain of which caused me to scream out loud. My whole family heard and came rushing to my room. My grandma took one look, and scoffed, "Oh suck it the f*ck up, princess." FML

#14330650
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10361) - you deserved it (24066)

On 12/25/2010 at 2:08am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was running late and rushing to a waiting bus. I made it to the doors just as they closed. I knocked desperately, hoping the driver would let me in. He hovered his hand over the button for a few seconds, then flipped me off and drove away laughing. FML

#14325917
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28531) - you deserved it (3223)

On 12/24/2010 at 5:32pm - misc - by hahahano (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I saw my first boobs ever, at 18, volunteering at a retirement home. FML

#14306986
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36441) - you deserved it (6868)

On 12/23/2010 at 3:18am - intimacy - by David H. -

Today, I overheard my husband telling my step-dad that I have the same ability to sniff out chocolate in a house as a certain animal has to find truffles in the woods. FML

#14294179
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17263) - you deserved it (5666)

On 12/22/2010 at 3:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I found out that if I try to resist a 70 pound bulldog that's humping my leg, I will end up with stitches. FML

#14294130
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22215) - you deserved it (2144)

On 12/22/2010 at 2:54am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my husband said that when we have sex he almost gets as excited as he does when he gets a chopper gunner on Black Ops. FML

#14284666
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32324) - you deserved it (7119)

On 12/21/2010 at 12:01pm - intimacy - by Hannah - United States (Kansas)

Today, I fell over on the bus. X-Rays revealed not only that I have been growing extra bones in my foot, but that when I fell, I crushed all of them. Doctors don't know how to fix bones that aren't supposed to be there, so they're just going to cut them out. Two days before Christmas. FML

#14257367
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30639) - you deserved it (2058)

On 12/19/2010 at 4:17am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Otago)

Today, I don't know anyone in the city where I just moved. I felt really lonely so I picked up my cat to try and cuddle with her. She freaked out and ripped my face apart. She ran then away to go play with the cats outside. Even my cat has more friends than me. FML

#14138227
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25083) - you deserved it (4291)

On 12/09/2010 at 12:33am - love - by owew -

Today, I was Rizzo in a production of Grease. I sang a line about needing a ring. I've been able to put up my left ring finger for every rehearsal, but today I put up the one next it. I flipped off the audience. FML

#14136007
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9868) - you deserved it (19071)

On 12/08/2010 at 9:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, at my wedding reception, I jokingly asked my aunt, who has always been convinced that I am gay despite my protests, if she believed me now. She took this the wrong way and drunkenly went around telling my guests that my wedding was a sham to convince her I was straight. FML

#14128663
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23873) - you deserved it (4175)

On 12/08/2010 at 4:40am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was messing around in my boyfriend's pants while watching TV. He was totally absorbed in the fishing show that was on. When the guy lost a fish, he got so disappointed that he became completely flaccid. FML

#14128362
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24034) - you deserved it (4821)

On 12/08/2010 at 3:46am - intimacy - by fishruinsex -

Today, I had to leave my one-night stand in my flat because I was giving a guest lecture at the local university. Halfway through, I hear someone sneaking in so I jokingly asked if they had a 'wild night out.' It was the guy I slept with. FML

#14119620
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9404) - you deserved it (33806)

On 12/07/2010 at 12:21pm - intimacy - by openmouthinsertfoot (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I got mugged. After taking my cell phone, the guy politely said: "Thanks. Have a nice evening. Be careful on your way home." FML

#14119130
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30474) - you deserved it (2615)

On 12/07/2010 at 11:09am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Guatemala (Guatemala)

Today, I got a phone call from a friend, who lives in the same neighbourhood as me, wondering if it was my father she saw walking a dog by her house, wearing only his boxers. It was. FML

#14117134
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18055) - you deserved it (1464)

On 12/07/2010 at 5:35am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Ostfold)

Today, I was on the couch, about to make out with the guy I've been dating. As soon as our lips touched, my overprotective dog ran up and bit him. He bled. FML

#14109694
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21783) - you deserved it (4319)

On 12/06/2010 at 5:50pm - animals - by Addicted2FML303 (woman) - United States (Utah)



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