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ModernLightz's favorite FMLs
Today, my dad took me to the empty parking lot of Wal-Mart to try driving for the first time. All was well until he shouted at me for going too slow, which startled me into jerking the wheel and simultaneously stomping on the gas. I don't think Geico covers a Wal-Mart-sized dent in one's car. FML
by gilbirds / 02/06/2013 at 7:49pm / United States (Ohio) / Transportation
Today, I was out to coffee with an extremely attractive friend. A crazy man came up to the window we were facing. He took one look at her, then turned to me with a big, congratulatory smile, flashing me a thumbs-up. Then he turned to her, frowned disappointedly and gave a thumbs-down. FML
by offended / 06/14/2012 at 4:11am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by creeped out / 06/12/2012 at 2:28pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by Gabi / 02/20/2012 at 9:23am / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
by AudraRose / 09/07/2011 at 12:57pm / United States / Health
Today, I was masturbating in the dark with the door open. I thought I saw a figure outside my door, because I didn't have my glasses on. After intensely staring at the dark figure for about a minute, thinking it was my imagination, my stepdad said, "you know, I am looking RIGHT at you," FML
by danggit3290 / 05/03/2009 at 1:17pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
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- Today, I screamed so hard during a nightmare that I developed Laryngitis. I work in a call center.… Today my manager tried to force me to sign an employee contract (I've worked here a year) that she… Today, I finally went to talk to my neighbour upstairs. He is always throwing his cigarette buts on…