Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MmmHotWaffles

Search for a member

MmmHotWaffles

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 42734
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About MmmHotWaffles : I'm Nerdy.

MmmHotWaffles's page activity

Visits<b>matthamm83</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 11:56pm<b>accidentalsheep</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 8:27pm<b>NoNamedBrilliant</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 2:39am<b>Mrhammer404</b> - the 12/27/2014 at 2:37pm<b>grogers311</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 11:14am<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 6:02pm<b>kelseysking</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 6:04pm<b>Haglog</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 7:27am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 5:38pm<b>melinal</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 6:29pm<b>cooljak96</b> - the 03/01/2014 at 1:36pm<b>Dellira</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 9:53pm<b>Jellybellybeanz</b> - the 02/12/2014 at 11:56am<b>Katiekhalifa</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 8:49am<b>ctuan13</b> - the 12/27/2013 at 1:06pm<b>Hunter8787</b> - the 10/20/2013 at 3:48pm<b>theweave72</b> - the 10/06/2013 at 8:06pm<b>profligatesoul</b> - the 03/24/2013 at 2:31am

MmmHotWaffles's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

MmmHotWaffles's favorite FMLs

Today, I was preparing a dinner for some business associates, in hopes of closing the deal on a promotion. I emailed them with the menu, in case there were any allergies. Hours later, I checked the email again to find that instead of serving the Roast Duck I would be serving the Roast Fuck. FML

#2282414
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20903) - you deserved it (42098)

On 05/25/2009 at 5:42pm - misc - by wordmalfunction (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She told me that her father didn't approve of me and forced her out of the relationship. Her father died 2 years ago. FML

#2273679
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67938) - you deserved it (3633)

On 05/25/2009 at 12:43pm - love - by nadette (man) - United States (California)

Today, I snuck out of my house in the middle of the night. I ran into my dad carrying wine into another house. I didn't assume he was cheating until he saw me and said "I won't tell if you don't tell, please don't tell your mother". FML

#2271321
258 comments

I agree, your life sucks (81039) - you deserved it (5025)

On 05/25/2009 at 10:55am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mom was driving me somewhere. As we were driving she got mad at a motorcycle driver telling to "get the fuck off the road." In response, the driver decided to spit into my open window. His spit landed on my face. FML

#2267007
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51345) - you deserved it (3932)

On 05/25/2009 at 3:43am - misc - by hahahah111 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out my parents joined the mile high club. While I was on the plane. FML

#2257216
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66106) - you deserved it (4651)

On 05/24/2009 at 10:17pm - intimacy - by boardman (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I confronted my fiancé and told him I knew his 'little secret'. I had suspected that he had been ruining his wedding diet by eating pizza at the office. He replied that the affair with his secretary had only been going on for a couple of months. FML

#2251338
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77004) - you deserved it (7566)

On 05/24/2009 at 7:39pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was watching tv on the couch. My mom then kicked me off so she could lie down. Exhausted, I asked if I could sit at the end. She said no. A minute later she called the dog to come sit with her. As I was sitting on the ground, my mom told me to move because "the dog can't see the TV." FML

#2241699
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74082) - you deserved it (4135)

On 05/24/2009 at 2:05pm - animals - by holly (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I decided to use my mentor's advice. I told her I had been having some trouble controlling my anger, she told me to throw rocks at trees. I threw a rock at a tree, very hard. It bounced back hit me above the eye. I'm still pissed as shit. FML

#2238808
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51449) - you deserved it (18329)

On 05/24/2009 at 12:03pm - misc - by untitledentity (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, my girlfriend's dad asked me if I wanted to drive his 2008 Jaguar XKR. Excitedly, I agreed. He then spent the next hour discussing with me how masturbation is a great alternative to sex, and a great way to remain abstinent. I didn't get to drive. FML

#2235853
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54919) - you deserved it (4167)

On 05/24/2009 at 8:43am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, none of my 500 Facebook friends responded to my status about "who wants to hang out during summer holidays?" I created an imaginary person on a different account to respond and ask me to hang out with him. I had a conversation on my status, with myself. FML

#2232704
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56440) - you deserved it (43838)

On 05/24/2009 at 2:43am - misc - by ineedalifekay (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got into a huge fight with my boyfriend. I called him and started yelling at him over the phone. He told me that if I wanted to end the relationship I should just hang up the phone right then. Before I could say I still love him and don't want to break up, my phone battery died. FML

#2228533
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (102597) - you deserved it (24925)

On 05/24/2009 at 12:14am - love - by noboyfriend (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was straightening my hair when I heard this crunching, sizzling sound. Taking the flat iron away, I realized that I had just fused a spider to my hair with the heat. FML

#2207384
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62389) - you deserved it (6258)

On 05/23/2009 at 10:03am - animals - by beatricesank (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I thought I'd finally make a step towards getting over my ex-fiancé by flirting with a cute waiter. I left him a note on the bill. He comes back, says "which one of you is [name]?" and leans down close to me to say, "Thanks for your note, but your card was declined." FML

#2203706
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49397) - you deserved it (7633)

On 05/23/2009 at 2:43am - love - by Mel (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was lining a soccer field. I had the entire grid laid out, so I began to paint with a handheld cart. I finished the entire field without looking back once. I forgot to put paint in the cart. I walked around a field for an hour painting with air. FML

#2201893
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14685) - you deserved it (61413)

On 05/23/2009 at 1:15am - misc - by onlyme (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I was putting on cream and my son asked what it was for. I told him it was to keep the wrinkles away. He looked at me closely and replied, "I don't think it's working." FML

#2201363
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44420) - you deserved it (6106)

On 05/23/2009 at 1:04am - kids - by julieb (man) - United States (New York)



FML's blog

  • Angie's illustrated FML
  • Here we go again. This week I'm talking to you live from the Paris Japan Expo. I'm dressed up as Bernard from the Sailor Moon series, and I almost got kicked out because my katana wasn't the…

Friday 3 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: