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MissahMissy's FML badges
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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
MissahMissy's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 09/08/2010 at 7:24am / United Kingdom (Gloucestershire) / Health
Today, 50,000 copies of the new edition of the town's phone book came out. I manage a pizza place and bought a full menu ad. Apparently the ad designer got confused, as they placed my cell phone number in huge bold letters at the bottom of the ad instead of the store's phone number. FML
by Anonymous / 09/07/2010 at 3:16pm / United States (Iowa) / Work
Today, I was woken up at 3:00 am to the sound of a tape recording of a baby crying, loudly. This has been going on for 3 nights, non stop. Why? because I brought up the subject of having a baby with my wife. Clearly, you can see where she stands. FML
by kfoehslfns / 08/01/2010 at 4:45am / United States (Oregon) / Kids
Today, my girlfriend was really depressed. I listed the top 50 reasons why I love her. Her response was "thanks for that but seriously, this video on youtube is hilarious." I couldn't cheer her up but apparently a 10 second video of a dog running in circles can. FML
by Samson / 02/14/2010 at 3:48am / United States (Alabama) / Love
Today, I've been unemployed for a year. For the last six months I had been trying for a good paying job at a great company, who kept saying they would hire me when the economy improves. Three weeks ago I gave up and moved 2 hours away. Guess who just called to finally offer me a job. FML
by ironorr / 01/25/2010 at 7:41pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work
by wowhoopla / 01/10/2010 at 8:10pm / Miscellaneous
Today, I got all dressed up for a New Year's party. When my parents and siblings left the house to their parties, I got undressed. I wasn't going to a party. I only got dressed up so my family would think I had plans. FML
by Shawna / 01/01/2010 at 8:19pm / United States (Delaware) / Miscellaneous
by Missyangel / 12/31/2009 at 2:39am / United States (Florida) / Kids
Today, I had one more gift to buy: a copy of Fight Club. I asked a person working at Best Buy if they had any in stock. The man wouldn't sell me the last copy because I had broken the first two rules. FML
by Anonymous / 12/24/2009 at 3:10pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I watched Paranormal Activity which is known to be the scariest film ever. After the film, I went to brush my teeth and out of the corner of my eye I saw the bathroom door closing by itself. I jumped out of my skin and stabbed myself in the eye with my toothbrush. It was just my dog. FML
by J / 11/24/2009 at 1:45pm / United Kingdom (Somerset) / Animals
by jobless / 11/10/2009 at 2:16pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Work
by poorcollegestudent / 10/30/2009 at 4:32pm / Canada (Alberta) / Money
Today, I had my 21st birthday party. My friends told me to have the party even though it had been 5 months since my actual 21st birthday. They asked me why I didn't have one originally and I jokingly told them it was because I didn't think anyone would come. Turned out nobody came after all. FML
by JimmySmoothBeans / 10/21/2009 at 8:15am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
Today, I bought a safe. I put all of my most prized possessions in it, including all of my jewelry, family heirlooms and important papers. Oh, and just before I locked it up, I put the key to the safe in there too. FML
by smarty / 10/16/2009 at 5:02pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out that my sister who is 16 years older than me is actually my biological mother. She and my parents decided it was best that I didn't know who my real mother was, and to be raised by my grandparents as their child. I've always hated my sister. FML
by dinosaurman / 10/07/2009 at 12:07pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I was getting intimate with my husband, and I tried to do a swift position-change like they… Today, my boyfriend and I were messing around in his car. I then decided I was going to give him a… Today, I woke up with a hangover and my girlfriend seemed pissed at me. It took me a while before I…