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Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, I found out that if a cop asks you if you have any weapons, and you reply by saying "only these guns" while flexing your biceps, they won't take it very well. And neither will the cops down at the station. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9239) - you deserved it (31863)
On 12/06/2011 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous -
Today, I sneezed so violently that my tampon came out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55024) - you deserved it (6663)
On 07/23/2011 at 9:06am - intimacy - by Sarah - United States
Today, my boyfriend and his bandmates were doing a live interview for a web show. Drunk off his ass, my boyfriend starts telling the internet how his ex-girlfriend is his biggest inspiration. I was standing right next to him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29081) - you deserved it (2594)
On 07/18/2011 at 9:20pm - love - by Btwigster (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I discovered that my husband is a tad paranoid after finding out that our cat has worms. He and I were in the middle of sharing a romantic shower following something of a dry spell when he bent over, spread his cheeks apart and asked, in earnest, "is there a worm sticking out of my ass?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (27844) - you deserved it (2793)
On 09/06/2010 at 12:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, my boyfriend of a over a year broke up with me. It wouldn't have been so bad if I hadn't written him a long letter about how much I love him, and that I'm so glad we're together and so glad that he promised he would always be there. He'll be getting it in a few days. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23689) - you deserved it (2934)
On 08/29/2010 at 7:41pm - love - by love_letter (woman) - United States (Hawaii)
Today, I mentioned to my dad (we have a close relationship) that my last condom had expired. Happy to buy me new ones for the sake of safe sex, he asked me "Do you need small, or extra small?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (26119) - you deserved it (18924)
On 08/23/2010 at 1:05am - intimacy - by diesel444 (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I heard my mother and father having sexual intercourse, and I found out that my mother moans the same way as my girlfriend. Guess who I now think about every time my girlfriend moans? FML
I agree, your life sucks (39270) - you deserved it (4378)
On 08/22/2010 at 8:14am - intimacy - by shawty - Australia (Queensland)
Today, my boyfriend decided it would be funny to record us having sex and me screaming his name. He set it as my ringtone without telling me. I had my phone volume on high as I was hanging out with my family. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27626) - you deserved it (7728)
On 08/18/2010 at 8:51pm - intimacy - by XxMe123xx - Sent from mobile version
Today, my boyfriend decided it would be funny to record us having sex and me screaming his name. He set it as my ringtone without telling me. I had my phone volume on high as I was hanging out with my family. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27626) - you deserved it (7728)
On 08/18/2010 at 8:51pm - intimacy - by XxMe123xx - Sent from mobile version
Today, for my mom's birthday, we went camping. At night, my mom and her boyfriend decided to have "Birthday Sex" because they thought everyone was asleep. Trying to not make it awkward for me and my friend that I brought along, I kept still. Soon, I heard my friend going to town on herself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37213) - you deserved it (3328)
On 08/16/2010 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)
Today, I had an elderly woman come up to me and tell me how well I pull off the look of being bald. She said that most women can't look attractive without hair. Then she asked me if I had cancer. I had to explain to her that I am, in fact, a man, and I shave my head because I'm a swimmer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28816) - you deserved it (3673)
On 08/11/2010 at 4:10am - health - by Jayswizzle (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I was in the car with my parents' friends. I was in the back with my window down when I felt something strange hit my ear. I then realized that the person sitting in front of me was picking their scab and throwing it out the window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21671) - you deserved it (1626)
On 08/09/2010 at 12:54pm - misc - by Scabs (woman) - United States (Utah)
Monday 17 June 2013
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