MissDarkness

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MissDarkness

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MissDarknessMissDarkness
  • Town/Country : Kristiansand, Norway
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 11 September 1983 (32 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 20930
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About MissDarkness : The devil made me do it!

MissDarkness's page activity

Visits<b>OMGitsLexxie</b> - 19 minutes ago<b>mrlucky22</b> - 57 minutes ago<b>dmorrte</b> - 2 hours ago<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - 3 hours ago<b>michaelm1290</b> - 5 hours ago<b>james08</b> - 6 hours ago<b>zaidthunder1</b> - 6 hours ago<b>Shayn_25</b> - 10 hours ago<b>T_Rev1017</b> - 23 hours ago<b>missadell</b> - yesterday at 7:37pm<b>bugjuice1</b> - yesterday at 6:10pm<b>charrbee90</b> - yesterday at 6:10pm<b>darkniss</b> - yesterday at 5:59pm<b>tin_cup</b> - yesterday at 5:39pm<b>NateshN</b> - yesterday at 5:12pm<b>Itineranthuman</b> - yesterday at 3:14pm<b>pandasaresocute</b> - yesterday at 10:52am<b>slt36537</b> - yesterday at 9:40am

Fucked!<b>james08</b> - just now<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - 9 hours ago<b>missadell</b> - 20 hours ago<b>charrbee90</b> - 21 hours ago<b>NateshN</b> - 22 hours ago<b>slt36537</b> - yesterday at 4:28am<b>classicate</b> - the 06/22/2016 at 8:22pm<b>zaidthunder1</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 8:17am<b>Itineranthuman</b> - the 06/17/2016 at 9:28pm<b>Martinez0285</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 6:38am<b>daveyyyyh</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 2:50pm<b>dmorrte</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 1:52am<b>Cherhorowitz</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 10:24pm<b>mkmon7</b> - the 06/05/2016 at 7:36pm<b>mineller</b> - the 06/05/2016 at 5:09pm<b>sandman676</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 9:16am<b>thewickedspider</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 11:29pm<b>Dusty_Cups</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 6:38pm

MissDarkness's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of MissDarkness's badges

MissDarkness's favorite FMLs

Today, I was woken up by my wife softly kissing me on the lips. Half asleep, I kissed her back, before quickly opening my eyes and realising it wasn't my wife; it was my dog. FML

by Anonymous / 08/27/2014 at 7:04pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Animals

Today, I was watching the movie Frozen with my 8 year old daughter. I had seen it before, so I sung along with some of the songs. My daughter put a finger over my lips, said "Shhhhhhhhut the fuck up," then turned back to the TV, giggling. FML

by JackieD / 08/25/2014 at 2:05pm / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, my girlfriend of three weeks found the engagement ring I tried to give to my ex. She started crying and said yes. FML

by lentmarz / 08/19/2014 at 7:37pm / United States (Idaho) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I had some painful gas at work, so I tried to silently ease it out. It was silent all right; silent, and so deadly that someone exclaimed, "What the fuck?!" My coworkers traced it back to me. Now they're all pointing their mini desk fans in my direction to make a point. FML

by Anonymous / 08/19/2014 at 5:54pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, after having multiple dreams where I have a daughter with my boyfriend, I'm now emotionally attached to a child who isn't real, and I get depressed when I can't be with her in real life. FML

by Anonymous / 08/14/2014 at 3:50pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, I attended a family gathering. My cousin's new baby was being passed around. By way of politely declining to hold it, I meant to say that I looked forward to getting to know it better once it could talk. What I blurted out instead was, "I can't wait until it resembles a human being." FML

by marcranger / 08/11/2014 at 7:40pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my husband and I attended a funeral. After the service, my phone vibrated. It was a text from my husband, saying "I've got mourning wood like you wouldn't believe! get it? MOURNING. haha :D" I looked up and saw him across the room, winking at me. Not the place, honey. FML

by jackie89 / 08/10/2014 at 3:26pm / United Kingdom (Cornwall) / Intimacy

Today, I went with my girlfriend to the gym for the first time. I knew I was in bad shape, but I bet her that I could lift more than her. Not only did I get my ass handed to me by a 5', 115lbs girl in front of the entire gym, I also have to attend Zumba in bright pink spandex. FML

by Dancing King / 08/07/2014 at 11:36am / Norway (Rogaland) / Health

Today, my blind date turned out to be my gynecologist. FML

by Anonymous / 08/04/2014 at 10:00pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my husband was disgusted by me expressing breast milk while we were in the shower together. This is the same man who thinks it's funny to pee on my legs because, "It'll wash off." FML

by Ew?Really? / 08/04/2014 at 1:42am / United States (Colorado) / Health

Today, my husband decided to play a recording of me breaking wind in my sleep to my whole family at the dinner table. To make matters worse, it was a compilation of different noises from over a long period of time. My family was horrified and my husband seemed proud of himself. FML

by blow away / 07/28/2014 at 12:36am / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, I was so ashamed of my weight when I sat down and the suction of my thighs made a loud fart noise, I admitted to it being a fart rather than my fat rolls. FML

by ThunderThighs / 07/23/2014 at 7:24pm / United States (New Jersey) / Health

Today, I managed to punch a customer's child as he walked around the corner just as I enthusiastically pointed his mother in the direction of what she was looking for. FML

by Anonymous / 07/23/2014 at 12:04am / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, I had to check up on a 400-pound inmate who was very upset about being locked up. When I got to his cell, he threw one of his own turds at me through the bars. I took a hit. FML

by Anonymous / 07/20/2014 at 1:23am / United States / Work

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take me out on a date. He doesn't have a car, but he said he'd borrow transport from his neighbor. He showed up at my house on a ride-on lawn mower. FML

by Lisa / 07/18/2014 at 4:21pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love