About MissDarkness : The devil made me do it!
Mobility
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Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Socialite
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Today, my boyfriend asked me to marry him, saying that the only thing he would change about me is my last name. I later told him that I wanted to keep my last name after the marriage. I'm now single again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16652) - you deserved it (32512)
On 05/14/2012 at 9:09pm - love - by singleagain (woman) - United States
Today, I found out where all my missing panties have gone, when my 12-year-old daughter was caught selling them to the boys at school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22437) - you deserved it (2529)
On 05/09/2012 at 6:09pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Egypt (Al Qahirah)
Today, I got tasered by a cop. It was his second day on the job. My crime? Sneezing during a sobriety test. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21852) - you deserved it (1426)
On 05/05/2012 at 7:44am - health - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I watched my boyfriend have a full on conversation with his penis. He also talks to his penis nicer than he talks to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17765) - you deserved it (2947)
On 05/05/2012 at 1:42am - intimacy - by CALIdime_15 - United States
Today, my boyfriend thought it was a good show of etiquette to answer a text message from his ex, while he was still inside me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22577) - you deserved it (2083)
On 05/04/2012 at 4:57pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)
Today, I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl, so I put an extra 30 pounds on the bar, I lowered, pushed... and pooped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10082) - you deserved it (29242)
On 05/04/2012 at 8:49am - health - by authorsubmit - United States
Today, I was working at the local liquor store. An obviously drunk girl stumbles in, grabs two cases of beer and puts them on the counter. Then she grabs a pregnancy test, pees on it right there, shows me, and says, "I'm not pregnant, I want beer." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23719) - you deserved it (1292)
On 05/04/2012 at 8:08am - work - by viviham - United States (Texas)
Today, while I was sneaking a boy out of my room at 2am, I ran into my mom sneaking a man into her room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26643) - you deserved it (7186)
On 05/03/2012 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by dentistrygirl - United States
Today, my husband informed me that he has been purposely finishing before me in bed as a form of punishment for beating him at Mario Kart. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25236) - you deserved it (5460)
On 05/02/2012 at 11:46am - intimacy - by winnerwinner (woman) - United States
Today, my boyfriend yet again unsuccessfully tried to hold in uncontrollable giggling every time I moaned or sighed during sex. He's 24. I'm terrified of his reaction should I ever reach an orgasm with him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19149) - you deserved it (1945)
On 05/01/2012 at 7:02am - intimacy - by epicsquishii (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I found out that my unemployed and very needy mother-in-law will be moving in with us soon. And during my conversation on the phone with her, she expects us to buy a house and my wife and I can "live with her." My wife agrees with all of this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19542) - you deserved it (1470)
On 04/24/2012 at 8:08pm - love - by nofrickenway - United States (Virginia)
Today, during my first day as a doctor’s intern, I attended a consultation. The embarrassed patient asked me to leave. Not really knowing my way around, I went through the first door I could find. By the time I realized it was a closet, I didn’t dare come back out. Twenty minutes is a long time to wait. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19546) - you deserved it (4304) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 04/18/2012 at 4:41pm - work - by bibou2324 -
Today, I found out my boyfriend and I have more in common than I thought. We both are sexually attracted to men. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32919) - you deserved it (2286)
On 04/18/2012 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by caitlinz5 (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, while vacuuming my new apartment, I farted a few times. After my last fart, I turned to find my super-hot neighbor standing at the door. Panicking, I asked in a "I-didn't-just-fart-my-ass" tone, "Oh hi! Been standing there for long?" She replied, "Since your initial rip." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17928) - you deserved it (4188)
On 04/18/2012 at 9:43am - misc - by Fartfail (man) - Hong Kong
Today, I had to put one of my preschool students in timeout for masturbating during nap time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28716) - you deserved it (2411)
On 04/17/2012 at 8:07pm - intimacy - by lindsaykay - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
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