Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MissDarkness

Offline (the 07/01/2015 at 1:15am) | Search for a member

MissDarkness

31Fucked!

MissDarkness
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 11 September 1983 (31 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 16511
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About MissDarkness : The devil made me do it!

MissDarkness's page activity

Visits<b>jjjbrew</b> - yesterday at 11:31pm<b>creeperdevon</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 7:02pm<b>RuBloKon</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 5:06am<b>psyjoniz</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 1:53am<b>missa8604</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 11:55pm<b>moron011</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 11:40pm<b>hardesty2904</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 8:38am<b>missmorggan</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 7:59am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 11:14am<b>omohamed</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 10:03am<b>dantee2005</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 8:37am<b>SYZ</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 8:32am<b>khoov19</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 9:56pm<b>yeatesj</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 8:52pm<b>ADBurns</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 4:38pm<b>Angel1999</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 10:37am<b>SweetSociopathy</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 2:52am<b>QueenDaniela</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 1:54am

Fucked!<b>missa8604</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 10:34pm<b>creeperdevon</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 6:06am<b>tranced_</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 4:26am<b>bps315</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 3:07am<b>apcsox</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 12:41am<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 11:40am<b>Dougie_Bee</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 7:03am<b>Urpoppy</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 5:45am<b>saffy66</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 5:45am<b>cOOkiEzRgOOd</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 4:30am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 2:41am<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 1:42am<b>inowhtthefoxsays</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 1:29am<b>the_aspect</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 1:20am<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 2:17am<b>dk1991</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 3:09pm<b>dakatabg</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 7:38am<b>RealSuperSand</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 7:01am

MissDarkness's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of MissDarkness's badges

MissDarkness's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that the reason why my boyfriend has been denying me sex isn't because he is scared of someone walking in on us. It's because his blow-up doll pleasures him more than I do. FML

#21417148
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29523) - you deserved it (4741)

On 05/28/2015 at 2:05pm - intimacy - by MarieAmber18 (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, one of my students tried to bribe me $200 to change his grade. When I said no and told him he was lucky I didn't report him, he went to the dean and told him I offered to change his grade for money. I'm now suspended and under investigation. FML

#21416617
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35947) - you deserved it (3091)

On 05/27/2015 at 12:25pm - work - by UN4 (man) - United States

Today, I got hit on by an attractive young doctor. After talking for a while we realized that we recognized each other but couldn't figure out how. Then he remembered. He was the one who'd delivered my 10 1/2 lb baby 7 months ago. I stood out because my vag tore worse than anything he'd ever seen. FML

Today, I waited tables for the first time at my new restaurant job. I asked a group of older men what they would like. One replied, "A slice of that ass". I'm 19 and a guy. FML

#21413610
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31622) - you deserved it (2796)

On 05/21/2015 at 4:41pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, some guy walked into the restaurant I work at and ordered enough food to serve the entire National Guard of Texas. He thanked us by leaving a $0.50 tip and shitting on the bathroom floor. FML

#21413064
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26839) - you deserved it (1625)

On 05/20/2015 at 2:40pm - work - by kmctl - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend suggested we start using a safe word during sex - not because we're into BDSM or anything like that, it's just in case she gets bored and wants me to stop. FML

#21412386
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29229) - you deserved it (4493)

On 05/19/2015 at 2:45am - intimacy - by username - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, one of my idiot co-workers thought it'd be hilarious to "fix" my car while I was working. Now every time I step on the brake pedal, the horn goes off. FML

#21412007
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28418) - you deserved it (2310)

On 05/18/2015 at 2:41pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I bought an expensive video game and decided to show it off and post a photo of it on Instagram. When I got home to play it, it rejected my activation key. I then realised it was showing in the Instagram post. FML

#21411390
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12665) - you deserved it (43396)

On 05/17/2015 at 9:09am - misc - by PISSED OFF - Australia

Today, I stuck my hand out the car window and noticed my arm fat flapping in the wind. FML

#21409639
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22941) - you deserved it (9140)

On 05/13/2015 at 7:19pm - health - by windthroughmyflab - United States

Today, during a very stressful and busy day at work, I took a bathroom break. Unfortunately, of all the things on my mind, taking down my pants before emptying my bladder wasn't one of them. FML

#21407716
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28060) - you deserved it (7009)

On 05/10/2015 at 10:34am - misc - by pissed (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was spooning with my girlfriend. She fell asleep and spent the next 15 minutes farting on me. FML

#21407637
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29590) - you deserved it (4318)

On 05/10/2015 at 4:40am - love - by gassygirlfriend - United States (Idaho)

Today, I found out that maggots can live inside of a saxophone. FML

#21406781
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27412) - you deserved it (3723)

On 05/08/2015 at 1:40pm - misc - by McWhopper - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, at a party I got blind drunk and I gave a guy a blowjob for the first time. I'm a 100% heterosexual male. FML

#21406764
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19780) - you deserved it (36713)

On 05/08/2015 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - India (Delhi)

Today, I pulled a piece of dental floss out of my ass. How it got there is one of life's great mysteries. FML

#21403757
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31506) - you deserved it (4633)

On 05/03/2015 at 3:42am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend that me switching to "super" sized tampons does not mean I've been having sex with other men with bigger penises, and that my vagina hasn't been "stretched bigger". FML

#21403711
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31710) - you deserved it (2993)

On 05/03/2015 at 1:37am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)



FML's blog

  • Angie's illustrated FML
  • Here we go again. This week I'm talking to you live from the Paris Japan Expo. I'm dressed up as Bernard from the Sailor Moon series, and I almost got kicked out because my katana wasn't the…

Friday 3 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: