About MissDarkness : The devil made me do it!
MissDarkness's FML badges
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
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MissDarkness's favorite FMLs
Today, my District Manager was impressed by all the appointments in my upcoming calendar. Bubbling with pride, I blurted out "Oh, I just love to have all my slots filled!" The awkward silence was only broken by "That's what she said!" from the next cubicle. FML
by officeditz / 06/03/2015 at 9:59pm / United States (Florida) / Work
by YuckyDuckyLucky / 06/03/2015 at 1:36pm / Norway (Oslo) / Health
by betterthanhodor / 06/03/2015 at 11:46am / United Kingdom / Health
by Anonymous / 06/03/2015 at 1:01am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by Zufallian / 06/02/2015 at 8:55pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
by lanaoftherey / 06/02/2015 at 5:30pm / United States / Transportation
by Anonymous / 06/02/2015 at 11:23am / United States (Texas) / Animals
by pheonixxe / 06/01/2015 at 6:45pm / United States (Wyoming) / Kids
by ephram17 / 06/01/2015 at 12:21pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Sleepy / 05/31/2015 at 11:51am / United States (Armed Forces Europe, Middle East) / Miscellaneous
Today, my crackhead neighbour got slightly annoyed at my 2-day-old daughter's late-night wailing. Well, I think so, anyway, as she politely requested us to "SHUT THAT CUNT KID UP." or she would "BLOW BOTH OUR HOUSES UP, YOU FUCKING ASSFUCKS." But I'm not 100% sure. FML
by Anonymous / 05/29/2015 at 11:51pm / Australia / Kids
Today, I was on the train going to work when my travel tea cup began spilling inside my purse, which was on my lap. It went all over my skirt, pooled at the bottom of my feet, and, yes, everyone notice that it happened to be piss-colored yellow. FML
by Great / 05/29/2015 at 8:13am / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation
by idonthavereligion / 05/29/2015 at 12:16am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
Today, for my birthday, my boyfriend made me a coupon book. I thought it was sweet until I noticed they were all conditional. For example; "Give your boyfriend a blowjob and he'll give you a 10 minute back massage!". They're all like that and he's mad because I refuse to use them. FML
by shmoooopie / 05/28/2015 at 11:39pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy
by MarieAmber18 / 05/28/2015 at 2:05pm / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy