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MissDarkness

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MissDarkness

5Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 11 September 1983 (31 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 7169
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About MissDarkness : The devil made me do it!

MissDarkness's page activity

Visits<b>S232Flash</b> - 5 hours ago<b>PerSueTwo513</b> - 8 hours ago<b>harlz31</b> - 8 hours ago<b>worldclassrager</b> - 12 hours ago<b>lukeshyp</b> - 12 hours ago<b>MomentoMori</b> - 12 hours ago<b>barneystinson45</b> - 16 hours ago<b>ElNeqriito</b> - 18 hours ago<b>MattBenid</b> - 21 hours ago<b>ChristianH39</b> - 24 hours ago<b>cinskeep43</b> - yesterday at 1:34am<b>terryaly</b> - yesterday at 12:50am<b>sju91</b> - yesterday at 12:29am<b>CammyGal</b> - yesterday at 12:12am<b>Garrett2818</b> - yesterday at 10:29pm<b>Drag0nb0rn</b> - yesterday at 10:22pm<b>DJisHere11</b> - yesterday at 9:05pm<b>Jeeper4Life</b> - yesterday at 8:43pm

Liked!<b>worldclassrager</b> - 6 hours ago<b>Evil20071</b> - yesterday at 6:21am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 2:37am<b>jenkelo</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 8:02pm<b>RockUntilYouDie</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 2:55pm

MissDarkness's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of MissDarkness's badges

MissDarkness's favorite FMLs

Today, my obese mother-in-law took her top off at our pool party, exposing her sagging breasts. When I told her to cover herself, she lifted her breasts, turned them inwards, and squeezed them together while staring me in the eyes. She kept doing this on and off for the next two hours. FML

#20872521
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46502) - you deserved it (4613)

On 09/08/2013 at 2:52am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through my birthday card. FML

#20871364
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61366) - you deserved it (3576)

On 09/07/2013 at 12:08pm - love - by brycepetrillo - United States (Florida)

Today, my sister-in-law pooped with the bathroom door open until my husband had to tell her to close it, then she came out with unwashed hands and started rooting through the cookies. This isn't even the most unhygienic thing she's done today. FML

#20871127
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49271) - you deserved it (3153)

On 09/07/2013 at 7:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, a week after my dad discovered Family Guy and started mindlessly repeating catchphrases from it 24/7, I finally lost my temper and told him how incredibly annoying it is. He just paused, turned to look me in the eyes, and said, "Shut up, Meg." FML

#20870528
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51538) - you deserved it (18761)

On 09/06/2013 at 6:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, the mother of one of my students bitched me out about her son's poor grades. He lazes around all day, paying no attention and being a constant nuisance. But, she says it's not his fault, and demands that I give him better grades so he won't get "self-esteem" issues. FML

#20870380
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46680) - you deserved it (3052)

On 09/06/2013 at 4:36pm - work - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, for the third time since breakfast, I accidentally walked in on my father wanking. FML

#20870154
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50443) - you deserved it (6278)

On 09/06/2013 at 12:48pm - intimacy - by jesus christ, dad (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, while working at Home Depot, I was asked to cut some wire. When I asked her how much, she said, "From my computer to the wall". After explaining for a while that I didn't know how far that is, she left. FML

Today, I had to clean human excrement at work when the fitting room turned into the shitting room. FML

#20869873
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40786) - you deserved it (2429)

On 09/06/2013 at 3:01am - work - by lifesucks0925 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was asked by my neighbor to stop jogging in our neighborhood because he keeps catching his son whacking off while watching me. His son is 28 years old and still lives at home. I'm 18. FML

#20869383
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57487) - you deserved it (4116)

On 09/05/2013 at 8:46pm - intimacy - by whatjusthappened - United States (Ohio)

Today, I came home to find my housemate cowering in the lounge corner, sobbing, hugging a bag of chips while the automatic vacuum cleaner gently bumped into him. Apparently he "mistakenly" put magic mushrooms in his sandwich instead of peanut butter. FML

#20868509
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39174) - you deserved it (2907)

On 09/05/2013 at 3:45am - misc - by down trodden (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was asked to dumb myself down so the people I was training could comprehend what I was saying. FML

#20868484
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35782) - you deserved it (6325)

On 09/05/2013 at 2:57am - work - by Retarded (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my car window got smashed, because someone somehow confused the doll my daughter always leaves strapped into a carseat for an actual kid. It's a cabbage patch kid. FML

#20867513
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46435) - you deserved it (3654)

On 09/04/2013 at 2:10pm - kids - by mother to an ugly doll - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I ended up taking a massive dump after being constipated for a while. I thought I was alone, so I pretended I was giving birth to my turd, and let out all kinds of sound effects. Next thing I know, I hear a knock at the door and my mom asking, "Should I call 911?" FML

#20866525
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23025) - you deserved it (36463)

On 09/03/2013 at 7:53pm - health - by ugh - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had to feed an elderly man in the care home in which I work while he was whacking off. Our work policy states that I have to pretend not to notice. FML

#20865686
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58822) - you deserved it (4192)

On 09/03/2013 at 2:30am - intimacy - by poolgirl789 (woman) - United Kingdom (Bradford)

Today, my husband thought it would be acceptable to watch Breaking Bad on Netflix with my 4-year-old in the room. What happened to be the only line he picked up? "Well heil Hitler, bitch!" I found out from his preschool teacher. FML

#20865525
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41430) - you deserved it (4592)

On 09/03/2013 at 12:13am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)



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