Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MissDarkness

Offline (the 06/26/2015 at 2:10pm) | Search for a member

MissDarkness

31Fucked!

MissDarkness
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 11 September 1983 (31 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 16336
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About MissDarkness : The devil made me do it!

MissDarkness's page activity

Visits<b>RuBloKon</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 5:06am<b>psyjoniz</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 1:53am<b>missa8604</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 11:55pm<b>moron011</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 11:40pm<b>hardesty2904</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 8:38am<b>missmorggan</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 7:59am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 11:14am<b>omohamed</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 10:03am<b>dantee2005</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 8:37am<b>SYZ</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 8:32am<b>khoov19</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 9:56pm<b>yeatesj</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 8:52pm<b>ADBurns</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 4:38pm<b>Angel1999</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 10:37am<b>SweetSociopathy</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 2:52am<b>QueenDaniela</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 1:54am<b>marktimemark</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 12:16am<b>creeperdevon</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 12:06am

Fucked!<b>missa8604</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 10:34pm<b>creeperdevon</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 6:06am<b>tranced_</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 4:26am<b>bps315</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 3:07am<b>apcsox</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 12:41am<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 11:40am<b>Dougie_Bee</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 7:03am<b>Urpoppy</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 5:45am<b>saffy66</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 5:45am<b>cOOkiEzRgOOd</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 4:30am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 2:41am<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 1:42am<b>inowhtthefoxsays</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 1:29am<b>the_aspect</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 1:20am<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 2:17am<b>dk1991</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 3:09pm<b>dakatabg</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 7:38am<b>RealSuperSand</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 7:01am

MissDarkness's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of MissDarkness's badges

MissDarkness's favorite FMLs

Today, I attempted to break the record for the heaviest squat in my local gym. A small crowd witnessed me breaking the record as well as releasing a huge fart. FML

#21420235
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26631) - you deserved it (5013)

On 06/03/2015 at 1:36pm - health - by YuckyDuckyLucky - Norway (Oslo)

Today, I got my make-up remover wipes mixed up with my sister's self-tan wipes. I am currently watching my face slowly turn orange and there is nothing I can do about it. FML

#21420192
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25115) - you deserved it (5096)

On 06/03/2015 at 11:46am - health - by betterthanhodor - United Kingdom

Today, my 14 years old brother and 9 years old sister were fighting. My brother said "You suck!" to my sister, and she replied with "You swallow!" FML

Today, I was riding my newly trained horse. I've recently been suffering from bad gas, and ended up farting so violently, it spooked my horse into bucking me off and running away. FML

#21419654
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23830) - you deserved it (4587)

On 06/02/2015 at 11:23am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, frustrated with my very energetic kids, I told them that if they dug a hole deep enough in the backyard, they'd find China. What they really found was the previous owner's dog. FML

#21419303
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28363) - you deserved it (7093)

On 06/01/2015 at 6:45pm - kids - by pheonixxe (woman) - United States (Wyoming)

Today, I accidentally hit my husband in the face. Not 2 minutes later, while laying in bed and trying to apologize, I accidentally kneed him in the balls. FML

Today, the phone kept ringing so I picked it up and answered. When there was no response, it took a minute to realize that I was still in bed and talking to my hand. FML

#21418531
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24747) - you deserved it (4368)

On 05/31/2015 at 11:51am - misc - by Sleepy (woman) - United States (Armed Forces Europe, Middle East)

Today, my crackhead neighbour got slightly annoyed at my 2-day-old daughter's late-night wailing. Well, I think so, anyway, as she politely requested us to "SHUT THAT CUNT KID UP." or she would "BLOW BOTH OUR HOUSES UP, YOU FUCKING ASSFUCKS." But I'm not 100% sure. FML

#21417851
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29435) - you deserved it (2492)

On 05/29/2015 at 11:51pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, I was on the train going to work when my travel tea cup began spilling inside my purse, which was on my lap. It went all over my skirt, pooled at the bottom of my feet, and, yes, everyone notice that it happened to be piss-colored yellow. FML

#21417508
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25346) - you deserved it (3967)

On 05/29/2015 at 8:13am - misc - by Great (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I started my day off with a relaxing cup of coffee, the morning paper, and the sound of my mother informing me I will be going to hell for being not believing in God. FML

#21417394
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25933) - you deserved it (4757)

On 05/29/2015 at 12:16am - misc - by idonthavereligion (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, for my birthday, my boyfriend made me a coupon book. I thought it was sweet until I noticed they were all conditional. For example; "Give your boyfriend a blowjob and he'll give you a 10 minute back massage!". They're all like that and he's mad because I refuse to use them. FML

#21417382
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28433) - you deserved it (2908)

On 05/28/2015 at 11:39pm - intimacy - by shmoooopie (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that the reason why my boyfriend has been denying me sex isn't because he is scared of someone walking in on us. It's because his blow-up doll pleasures him more than I do. FML

#21417148
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29459) - you deserved it (4736)

On 05/28/2015 at 2:05pm - intimacy - by MarieAmber18 (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, one of my students tried to bribe me $200 to change his grade. When I said no and told him he was lucky I didn't report him, he went to the dean and told him I offered to change his grade for money. I'm now suspended and under investigation. FML

#21416617
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35937) - you deserved it (3087)

On 05/27/2015 at 12:25pm - work - by UN4 (man) - United States

Today, I got hit on by an attractive young doctor. After talking for a while we realized that we recognized each other but couldn't figure out how. Then he remembered. He was the one who'd delivered my 10 1/2 lb baby 7 months ago. I stood out because my vag tore worse than anything he'd ever seen. FML

Today, I waited tables for the first time at my new restaurant job. I asked a group of older men what they would like. One replied, "A slice of that ass". I'm 19 and a guy. FML

#21413610
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31620) - you deserved it (2795)

On 05/21/2015 at 4:41pm - work - by Anonymous - United States



FML's blog

  • Tania's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! How are you all doing? This week has been quite eventful for some people. Uber has been causing taxi drivers here and there to get their knickers in a twist, notable over here in France, which caused…

Friday 26 June 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: