Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Mimzilla

Search for a member

Mimzilla

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 993
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Mimzilla's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of Mimzilla's badges

Mimzilla's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw Thor and I wanted to see how realistic it was to be swinging a hammer around. Wrong idea. I ended up unconscious on the ground for ten whole minutes. FML

#19753882
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5368) - you deserved it (36326)

On 06/08/2012 at 4:09am - misc - by runner2731 - United States (Ohio)

Today, during the early hours, I got hungry and went to grab something to eat. I entered the kitchen, only to see my stark-naked dad sitting at the table, eating cereal and reading the paper. He just nodded at me and said, "Son." I think I need a new pair of eyes. FML

#19751282
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21361) - you deserved it (2111)

On 06/07/2012 at 7:09pm - misc - by Rohirus (man) - Sweden

Today, I got a lecture about being lazy and not being active enough for my age, which ended with, "When I was your age, I was out every night having sex with anything that breathed." Thanks Gran. FML

#19745357
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25860) - you deserved it (3222)

On 06/06/2012 at 5:37pm - intimacy - by BrianTheLion89 - United States

Today, a man on the bus questioned my sexuality for being a male nurse. I asked him what he did and he said he worked in a garage. When I pointed out that I work with sexy nurses all day and he works with sweaty guys, he punched me in the stomach. FML

#19743527
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35759) - you deserved it (5827)

On 06/06/2012 at 10:19am - misc - by Bishop (man) -

Today, when I was ordering pizza, I got a text from my mom saying "I love you". When the man thanked me I accidentally said, "I love you too." FML

#19719938
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23473) - you deserved it (4800)

On 06/02/2012 at 8:47am - misc - by lol112 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my parents grounded me for finding their stash of weed. The irony is killing me right now. FML

#19719129
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36013) - you deserved it (2601)

On 06/02/2012 at 1:43am - misc - by ironyisabitch - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend called me, panicking. Apparently he had a headache, but wasn't concentrating on what tablets he grabbed, and accidentally took tablets for "relief of period pain". He was convinced he was going to grow ovaries overnight. FML

#19697677
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23115) - you deserved it (2454)

On 05/29/2012 at 3:54am - health - by sopheeah - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to announce to the class that I finally got a girlfriend. I received a standing ovation. FML

#19601611
9 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23961) - you deserved it (3620)

On 05/10/2012 at 7:48am - love - by JG (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I called my wife from work to check in on her because she's eight months pregnant. She didn't answer. Instead she showed up at my work hysterically crying and screaming, "You don't love me because I'm a fat whale!" She then knocked everything off my desk. FML

#19255616
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30790) - you deserved it (2919)

On 03/11/2012 at 3:36am - love - by Tristan Brantley - United States (California)

Today, I was re-watching my wedding video. As I was walking down the aisle, you could hear my grandfather mutter "Here comes the bride, all fat and wide." FML

#19250410
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35780) - you deserved it (5270)

On 03/10/2012 at 9:20am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided it was time to lose our virginity. After our clothes were removed, we spent 30 minutes trying to figure out how to actually have sex, and eventually gave up. FML

#19249528
595 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23193) - you deserved it (52970)

On 03/10/2012 at 2:23am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my friend and I were playing football in the street, when out of nowhere a homeless man sucker punches me in the gut, grabs my football, and runs away laughing like a maniac. FML

#19177249
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23233) - you deserved it (2596)

On 02/27/2012 at 7:37pm - misc - by Username (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I turned on the news to see a live report about an increase in crime in my town. One minute in, my drunk daughter appears behind the news reporter, butt naked, dancing. FML

#18845928
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37874) - you deserved it (6079)

On 01/18/2012 at 5:30pm - misc - by MakesMeLol (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, it was my first day working as a nightclub bartender. All through the evening, a really creepy bloke stood in a dark corner and leered at the girls on the dance floor. When I took the bouncer to one side to let him know, he told me the man was a coat stand. FML

#18554140
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11713) - you deserved it (29255)

On 12/19/2011 at 3:57pm - work - by Bob smith (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I drank a fifth of vodka before I took my political science final. My professor later called me to tell me that I had written "Obama is a beautiful chocolate man" to every essay question. FML

#18465913
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11014) - you deserved it (87473)

On 12/09/2011 at 1:11am - misc - by blondie101 - United States



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: